Hello, my name is Zhu Dabao!
Why are bad habits such as playing on mobile phones and overeating so hard to quit? Although there are many ways to quit bad habits online, none of them seem to be particularly effective, and some of them can also provoke a sense of grooming. For example, I have seen a very high amount of reading method, is to wear a rubber band on the wrist, if you play with the mobile phone to play yourself as a punishment, this method is very ridiculous, if you have been so self-disciplined, abide by the rules of making mistakes, then whether to play the mobile phone is something that the will can control, and you will not fall into the addiction of playing mobile phones. Some people try it but find that they don't comply, they don't play themselves and don't stop playing their phones, but it arouses a lot of shame, they feel that they are very bad, very undisciplined, others can, why can't they themselves? More inferiority, more self-abandonment, broken jars.
A lot of success learning and inspirational chicken soup are actually driven by shame, such as advocating how a certain celebrity is excellent and learning from him, which is a routine for parents of toxic giant babies to say how other people's children are excellent, and may be able to play some chicken blood in a short term for a day or two, because these inspirational chicken soups stimulate shame and insecurity by contrasting suppression and hidden humiliation, and your subconscious starts the survival mechanism in order to find a sense of security, which is a mechanism that quickly consumes yourself to save your life. But letting shame and insecurity flare up for a long time can deplete one's self-esteem and self-love, which is the spirit of long-term hard work**, which makes people more depressed.
Then the business opportunity of successful learning comes, you see that you can't do it, hurry up and buy my membership course, balabala. Shame comes up, and you may impulsively place an order in order to get rid of the grooming.
Let's talk about how to quit bad addictive habits such as playing with mobile phones, in fact, most people know that these bad habits are not good for them, so why do they do self-destructive things when they know it? Because of nature, quitting these bad habits against nature may be even more confused, is our nature self-destructive? No, it's in your nature to live well, but if something forces you to engage in an addictive behavior like playing with your phone, it means that there is something in your situation that destroys you more than playing with your phone, isn't it more confusing?
Don't worry, listen to me explain to you a very important knowledge point, dopamine. As I said in previous articles, dopamine is an important brain chemistry that stimulates human long-term efforts, in addition to making us happy and happy, dopamine is also an important chemical substance for the human brain nervous system to maintain balance and stability, if there is a lack of dopamine imbalance due to some factors, the brain nervous system will be unbalanced, such as inattention, emotional instability, logical confusion, hallucinations, uncoordinated actions and other problems, the brain in order to strive to return to a balanced state, urgently need to supplement dopamine, However, due to the unfavorable situation and environment you are in, you can only tend to demand a way to get dopamine quickly and at a low cost, so playing with mobile phones and overeating is a fast and low-cost way, so it is your brain and body that are saving themselves, recovering a little imbalance in the brain and nervous system, so that the brain will not collapse, and the result of collapse will be more serious, which may be a mental breakdown.
At this time, you should sit down and think about whether there are some bad people and bad things in your life that continue to bring you negative energy, such as narcissistic giant baby parents are always suppressing and humiliating you, plastic couples or plastic friends treat you as emotional trash cans, or your boss is a villain and will have no future with him, or you really don't like your career path, etc., these things in life that make you feel painful continue to consume your energy. Even wear down your physical and mental health, in the long run your dopamine will be out of balance and scarce, recall these consumption and wear out of your bad people and bad things when they appear, it will make you unhappy for a long time, this is the manifestation of a drastic drop in dopamine.
Unhappyness is really an extremely important signal, but your family of origin or social culture has always misled you and neglected to cover up your unhappiness.
For example, an Internet addicted teenager is often the least sick in the family, the parents of the Internet addicted teenager are generally narcissistic giant babies, performing perfect parents outside, suppressing and humiliating the child for a long time, hypocrisy, suffocating control of all aspects of the child, or indifference and ignorance, which is a great mental and even physical pain for the child, but the child has not escaped from the original family, and the ability to survive independently can only escape reality by playing games, relieve the pain, and the brain is struggling to support in this pitiful way, Fight against suffocating negative energy, barely maintain the spirit and not collapse.
But we have also seen some social news that some children are too unfortunate to support themselves, and finally have a nervous breakdown, severe depression, and suicide. So your muddy bad hidden behavior is a huge system given to you in your destiny, you have been consumed and worn out for a long time, your situation is very unfavorable to you, you need to make major life adjustments, this is an opportunity for you to calm down and observe your environment, if you feel pain, then pain is a signal for you to make changes.
When you readjust your social circle and work life, and your dopamine returns to normal, you will naturally no longer seek to use these bad habits to stimulate dopamine production, in fact, you don't like to play with your phone or eat junk food in the first place, do you?