Text October.
Now there are a lot of people who have it"Fear of marriage"., when it comes to getting married, ah, it's terrible to not get married.
When I asked where I came to this conclusion, everyone said that the lessons of the past are not everywhere, my aunt, my second aunt, and even my mother, which are all typical examples of marital disasters.
The question is, why do so many people, especially women, always feel unhappy in their marriages?
Actually, most of them are related to one word, and that word is:Busy!
1 Busy to the point of losing oneself
Many wives are particularly susceptible to this in their marriageFrustrated, anxious, frenzied, and these emotions are often not understood by others.
These are actually the after-effects of being overly busy:
You will graduallyConfusedI don't know why I have to do these things.
It will also be gradualBipolar disorder, I really want to strike, but because of the responsibility on my shoulders, I have to persevere, and I am more and more painful in this contradiction.
I have a client and she's very busy.
Although it is a 9-to-6 job, the commute is not far, and ten minutes is enough.
But because her children had to go to school, she had to get up at six o'clock to make breakfast.
Go home from work for the last day, cook, clean up, help the children do their homework, this time, it's just.
It's nine or ten o'clock.
As soon as I touched **, I felt that people were almost tired and paralyzed, not to mention her husband, she didn't have the heart to be sweet and love.
Not only weekdays, but also rest days are rare.
Maybe driving to see the elderly, maybe taking the children to the mall.
In total, there are less than five hours of time left for yourself in a week.
If you don't encounter anything extra, it's okay, at most it's like an assembly line worker, just spinning, although there are not too many turbulent interests, life is calm and peaceful, and you can barely get by.
I'm afraid of encountering some unexpected situationsBecause according to the tired state of wives, their ability to control their emotions is very weak.
To put it simply, as soon as something happens, she is easily depressed, anxious, and angry, and as long as her family can't catch her emotions, then wait for a fight.
Busy and tiring life, coupled with quarrels, this kindEmotional warsSpiritual non-support, how can wives be happy?
So this wife always has a few voices in her heart:
I give so much, no one knows how to be grateful!
Do these things have to be done? Do I have to do it?
When will these days come to an end?
Why was she so miserable? It's because she's busy and loses herself.
And without ego, it's terrible.
We can see that this itinerary is down, as if this wife has been circling in various roles.
In the morning, she is a wife, during the day is a worker, at night is a mother, and on weekends she is a daughter.
If you don't give yourself time and space to breathe, and you are on the road one after another, your unhappiness will definitely happen.
This is not only tired, but also a question about the meaning of life, and a hopelessness for beautiful things.
It seems that you have been paying for the happiness of others and sacrificing yourself for the happiness of others, which is unfair and wrong for the "self".
In the process of being busy, many wives always have a thought: I am so miserable.
This "miserable" is actually the cry of the "self" after being squeezed with high intensity, and it is calling for attention and release.
This also shows that wives need to stop once in a while, put down their work, and take a look at themselves.
And this is not in conflict with your desire to be a good wife, a good worker, a good mother, and a good daughter, we just need to pay more attention to the reasonable allocation of time.
How? 2 Magical Cave Time
People always need to squeeze out some time to spend with themselves, and this is how you love yourself, recharge yourself, and settle yourself.
This wife told me an episode.
One day she was cooking, there was no soy sauce, and there was no helper at home, so she went downstairs to buy it.
As a result, she saw that her husband lied that he was working overtime, but was actually sitting in the car, listening to songs, smoking, and brushing up on **.
This made her angry, she didn't just think her husband was lyingIt is a kind of "betrayal" of responsibility, selfishness!
She is busy at home, her husband is fine, hiding outside, this family is not her alone, why is she the only one doing practical things.
On this day, including the next few days, the two of them were arguing about this matter: they couldn't even pick out the time to quarrel, they could only store each other's cruel words, and continue to quarrel after work the next day.
But if we take this out and look at it completely in combination with the cause and effect, it seems that we can come to a different understanding.
This husband is also very busy, running business, overtime is commonplace, occasionally getting off work early, tutoring children also has his part, parents are in the city, not in good health, often have to visit.
He also juggles a variety of roles.
But he obviously knew very well that sooner or later he would break down if he continued like this: I should find a time, find a good place, and let myself recuperate.
He is very clever and can always find the right time to let himself rest quietly, for example, he will lock himself in the toilet and brush **, and lie about working overtime to sit in the car and play games.
Indeed, this is irresponsible behavior for the wifeBut thanks to these piecemeal breaks, he was able to adjust his mentality as soon as possible, so as to avoid more conflicts between husband and wife
After all, if both people are tired, who would willingly tolerate the other?
It can be seen that the necessary solitude is very important.
Wives can try to devote 70%, or even 80%, of their time to fulfilling the responsibilities and obligations of these roles.
You can also make a plan based on your original lifestyle.
For example, from seven o'clock to eight o'clock, this time period is the time of good wives and mothers, the next time period is the time for children to interact, and then the time for husband and wife to love, and the weekend plus a time for parents to fulfill their filial piety, so that it can be flexibly arranged according to the actual situation.
But I hope you can set aside some, and leave some time for yourself, no one cares, no one bother, and get along alone.
No matter what you use to do it, whatever you use it for, just remember one principle and make yourself happy, and that's enough.
That way, you don't get crushed and let yourself relax, then when you're in those roles, you areTravel light, it will not be so repulsive to do things.
There are two great wisdoms in life, one is calledJoy in suffering, another calledTake a break in the busy, which is the main point of this article.
Wives, when you feel unhappy in your marriage, too busy and tired in life, and unhappy in your life, these two tips of wisdom are our saviors.
Learn from the husbands who hide in the toilet and play with their mobile phones, and we can also be selfish once in a while.
What can't be thrown off will never be delayed, but the work that can be thrown off will be thrown out.
As long as I have time and opportunity, I must treat myself, have fun, and relax myself.
In this way, try to find a balance between the many characters and the "self".
You can fulfill the responsibilities and obligations of each role, and you can also please yourself and keep yourself energized.
Adjusting a few simple small satisfactions in a cramped life is actually enough to make you happier, more nourished, and more aware that life is meaningful and valuable.
**10,000 Fans Incentive Plan