The ancestor said: "Parents are here, don't travel far, there must be a way to travel." ”As long as the parents are alive and the children go out to study and work, it is best not to go far. After all, the ties of the family are difficult to let go, and the parents are old and need to have someone to rely on.
With the development of the times, more and more young people go out to work, and some people go to distant cities to pan for gold.
We always think that as long as we make money, we can honor our parents. In the eyes of parents, when their children are rich, they are face and income.
From traveling far away to marrying far away, everything is logical. Perhaps, it was opposed by the parents, but in the end, the parents chose to forgive and reconcile.
When a woman chooses to marry far away, she is often ignorant and immature enough.
My classmate Xiaoyan (pseudonym), born in southern Shonan, grew up in a ravine and ravine, and has never seen the world.
After graduating from junior high school, Xiaoyan went to Dongguan to work, and later went to Huizhou to marry Chaoshan.
In a flash, twenty-eight years after graduating from junior high school, the old squad leader Ah Kun Xingshi mobilized the crowd, convened several class cadres, and organized a party. After two weeks of preparation, the group of students was formed.
However, Xiaoyan did not join the group. One of her cousins said: "Don't contact her, even if you blow up, you won't come." ”
Only then did I know that when Xiaoyan was working part-time, she met a man from Chaoshan. After getting married, he has been living in Chaoshan and rarely goes home.
Ah Kun inquired for several days through his fellow villagers, and finally contacted Xiaoyan.
Xiao Yan was in ** and whispered: "Squad leader, don't embarrass me." My mother-in-law is seriously ill and needs to borrow money**, how can I have the money to go back to my hometown? ”
Ah Kun said: "Then you should come back, and the classmates will find a way to get together some money and help you." ”
Before she finished speaking, Xiaoyan hung up**.
Goodbye Xiaoyan, it was in the month of the previous year, at the dinner organized by Ah Kun.
Xiaoyan said that after 20 years of marriage, she only went back to her parents' house twice, and when her father passed away, she did not come back.
This marriage made Xiaoyan suffer a lot. At the beginning, she thought that with true love, her husband was intimate, and his wife was sincere, everything would be easy to do. As everyone knows, her husband's family is too poor and her life is difficult, so she has forced herself to become a long-term worker, and her parents' hearts are broken.
The daughter is the little padded jacket of her parents", when the women around her happily returned to her parents' house, Xiaoyan was still worried about the travel expenses, and her "little padded jacket" was no longer warm. Women always have to pay for their original naivety.
When a woman chooses to marry far away, she needs to think more backwards and assume more.
Love mentor Tu Lei said: "Age is not a problem, height is not a distance, but distance is really a problem." ”We always think that the power of love is particularly great, and it can overcome all suffering. As everyone knows, there are times when love is beyond the reach of the whip.
A woman, from the first day she chooses to marry far away, means that everything can only be carried by herself.
First, marrying far away is like an unfair gamble, winning or losing in the hands of the other party.
What is the husband's family really like? Who are the parents-in-law and will they accept themselves? What should I do if my marriage fails and I am bullied?
A series of questions, women can only guess, not sway. Perhaps, the word resignation is the most suitable for a woman's nervous mood.
There is no one around the woman, and the strength is particularly obvious.
Second, after marrying far away, the grievances are one's own, and I can't find a shoulder that I can really rely on.
Not all women are strong and can rely on their aura to suppress their parents-in-law.
When you are bullied, there should be a lot. The woman cried and asked her husband for comment, but the husband was also helpless and unreliable.
There is a good question: "If the daughter-in-law and mother fall into the water at the same time, who should be rescued first?" The heart-wrenching reply was: save the mother first, because the mother is the only one.
The implication is that wives are like clothes, which can be changed at any time, and there are many unique. It's chilling.
There are also differences between cities, which can make it difficult for women to live well. Maybe for years, I can't adapt to the new environment. I can't taste the taste of my hometown, and I can't understand other people's local dialects, which is very uncomfortable.
Third, the confidence of a woman who marries far away needs to be supported by money and her husband's love.
Whether life is good or not is not only about money, but also about the husband's willingness to spend money. Some men, after getting married, treat their wives as "outsiders" and are always on guard.
From time to time, a woman from outside may "flee back to her parents' home" at any time, and her husband will inevitably have such worries.
Fourth, marrying far away may mean "unfilial piety", and it will also make parents particularly worried.
No matter how far the daughter goes, she can't get out of the concern of her parents.Whoever says an inch is careless, and he will be rewarded with three springs. When parents send their daughters to distant places, their hearts must be mixed.
When the daughter does not come home for several years, the parents' hearts will feel very cold, and then they will also be very warm, desperately trying to be better for their daughter.
Conclusion. Of course, we can't desperately oppose long-distance marriage, after all, everyone has the right to pursue happiness and has different three views. It's just that before you make a decision, you have to see the truth and have a plan for your life and family.
After all, marriage, for a woman, is equivalent to a second reincarnation, and it can't be too hasty.
Generally speaking, a woman who chooses to marry far away needs to meet these conditions: she is very independent and has a great aura; Very adaptable, contradictions and grievances can be digested by themselves; Parents have other siblings to take care of, don't worry too much; The economic level is good, walking between the in-laws and the mother's house, and you can afford to pay the fare at any time.
"Raising a Girl" reads: "Parents are mentors and allies in a girl's development, and only by understanding the different characteristics of a girl's growth stage can they use their experience and resources to provide her with the necessary help." ”As a parent, if you have a daughter, you should tell her the truth about marrying far away earlier. When my daughter is becoming an adult, take her to see distant places and learn the skills of love.
Whether it is poor or rich, the key is to cultivate the heart - a family, the heart is connected, and there is more discussion in case of trouble.