A friend said that when people reach middle age, the people around you are not friends, but just "interests".
It is true that when people interact with each other, they must either benefit or empathize, and they must always have the same intentions.
People who really help you selflessly are not absent, but relatively rare. Some people who take the initiative to give red envelopes to the poor are in order to establish their "good person image" and have the intention of selling their fame and reputation.
Life is a process, and when you are fifty years old, you are already halfway there.
For the rest of my life, where do I go from here? No matter which path you take, you have to face the reality that "your own value is getting smaller and smaller". Don't lift yourself too high, or it will hurt when you fall.
Yishu said: "Really, as long as you are willing to let go, you can exchange for freedom." ”From now on, I would rather go it alone than give up the following relationships. Don't let cumbersome and useless connections trap you.
Give up the "dependence" of children on their parents and be well.
Long Yingtai wrote in "Seeing Away": "There are some things that can only be done by one person. There are some levels that can only be passed by one person. There are some roads that can only be walked alone. ”No matter how good parents are to their children, they will eventually be separated.
Perhaps, if you let go of your children and let them drift away, there will be too much reluctance. But when you keep your children around, you are only trapping their hands and feet, and you are causing them to fall frequently.
Love, if it is too passionate, becomes a rope, invisible but tightly tightened.
For example, parents rely on thrift and frugality, the demolition of their hometown, etc., to obtain a sum of money, but their children have been gnawing at the old age. If parents do not stop it in time, it can lead to a return to poverty in the family. After that, there is no way for the family to get along.
I have read such a sentence: "Parents who never teach their children to be independent are the most ignorant and cruel." They are like eagles who don't teach their eaglets to fly, but when they reach adulthood, they can't help but push them off a cliff. ”Fifty-year-olds, children should grow up, you have to be like eagles, catch them, throw them into the air, and force them to fly.
Children, when weaning, will cry for a few days, but after crying, they will laugh; Adults, without the support of their parents, will be very tired, but tired and happy.
The lonely old man, although lonely, talks about the achievements of his children, his eyes shine.
Abandon the "frequent movement" of siblings and keep your distance.
Fifty-year-olds have also taken a back seat in the workplace, and they have more time.
I often go to my siblings' house and have a meal, just like in my own home. Especially the people in the countryside are very simple and hospitable.
Don't be too self-righteous, whether the relationship between brothers and sisters is good or not is not up to you alone.
No matter who you go to, you can't go empty-handed. Giving gifts costs money. And,You often go to your siblings' houses, sisters-in-law, brothers-in-law, and brothers-in-law, most of them will gossip.
If the parents leave a lot of property, it is estimated that everyone will quarrel. Whether it's letting your family or joining the team of disputes, it's not a good thing.
If someone has a good mix, you always go to their house as a guest, and you think you want to covet some profit.
Recognizing the situation and keeping a distance from your siblings is the best policy. When I was a child, the innocence that everyone grew up with can only be remembered, not recovered.
gave up the "acting on the spot" in the workplace and gradually retreated.
If you observe carefully, you will find that the circle of friends posted by the leader has a lot of likes; The leader spoke in the work group, and the employees responded quickly and enthusiastically; The dinner with leaders is particularly lively, and there are always people who take the initiative to pour water and fill the rice.
If you like to tout leadership, how much benefit do you get from leadership?
Smart people have long stopped taking leaders seriously. What can be looked down upon by others is not "hypocritical words", but your achievements.
From another point of view, a 50-year-old person should have seen through the workplace, and he should not think about "promotion". In a few days, you will retire and face the situation of people going to tea and cooling.
Put away your "enthusiasm" and work steadily, it is enough. Even if you want to give way, it doesn't matter, you always have to give young people some room to grow.
Abandon the "eating and drinking" between acquaintances, no need to be polite.
The day before yesterday afternoon, my mother went to a class reunion.
At night, my mother came home and said very nervously that some of her classmates were drunk and talked nonsense at that time, and she was really worried.
You must know that at the dinner, no matter who has a problem drinking, everyone can't get out of it. The mother's worries are not superfluous.
My mother solemnly decided that she would never go to the class reunion again, spending money was nothing, and there were people who drank more than alcohol, and some people showed off themselves. She has been a farmer all her life, and when she goes to **, she is disgusting, and she will inevitably sit on the cold bench.
In fact, after people reach the age of 50, they really don't care about what meals they have anymore. Three or five friends get together, have a drink, and have deep feelings; There are more people, and there are more troubles.
When you are young, you may have to meet certain people because of your work and career development. When people are old, they resolutely do not go to any place that makes them uncomfortable.
Give up the "festivals" between enemies and take the initiative to reconcile.
Along the way in life, it is inevitable to offend some people. If someone hates you, you will hate someone else.
For example, in the workplace, people who compete with you for positions; In life, the people who look down on you; In the business field, people who secretly calculate.
As the saying goes, "Grievances should be resolved rather than settled." ”Don't bring hatred to the next generation. Shake hands with the "enemy" and make peace, and in the future, there will be no contact or entanglement.
Perhaps, your children and the children of the enemy family will work together, and they may even become "husband and wife, friends". Only by resolving the contradiction in advance will it not be embarrassing in the future.
A fifty-year-old person magnifies his own pattern and embraces all the ugly things. Even if the other party is not willing to reconcile, you have to show your attitude. If you have the conditions, after retirement, leave your original place of residence, keep your distance from the enemy, and let time decide everything.
When people are old, what does the best life look like?
There is an old wife by his side, chatting, and a dog with a wagging tail. Walking together between heaven and earth, carefree, under the sun, the shadow behind them seems lonely, but very happy.
A grass for a thousand autumns, a flower for a world. Life needs to return, not to go desperately to a high place all the time.
As Chen Guo said: "A friend is not a drinking buddy, a playmate, a comforter in times of loneliness, a spiritual shelter, or a network built for any utilitarian reason." It's often not friends who get together, but lonely people. ”After the age of 50, the best connection is probably - someone calls you "grandpa, grandma" and walks away.
Don't get caught up in the circle of people, maybe you want what you need.