In this era of looking at faces, we may inadvertently take "looking at money" as a by-product of our interactions.
Especially between in-laws, it is inevitable that there will be a psychological war of comparison. But when wealth becomes an appetizer on the table, we may be falling into a misunderstanding.
You see, in those TV series, as soon as the in-laws sat down, they turned on the competition mode: "My Xiao Ming works in a foreign company, and his monthly salary has exceeded 10,000 yuan!" Then the other party immediately counterattacked: "What's that, our Xiaohong's year-end bonus can buy a car!" ”
Doesn't that sound funny? But such a "boldness" is actually putting a golden hoop on your own childrenIt has invisibly increased the burden of their lives.
Excessive disclosure of the family's financial situation may not only cause jealousy and unnecessary comparisons among the in-laws, but also allow the children to silently bear the expectations and pressures of the outside world. After all, not everyone wants to live under the label of "rich second generation".
In the process of building trust with in-laws, sincerity and respect are the hard currency. There is no need to talk about the account balance and prove your worth with your child's achievements.
So, what do we do when family gatherings inevitably touch on sensitive topics? For example, when your in-laws ask where your family bought a new house, a witty response might be: "Oh, we've been looking at houses lately, but the most important thing is to find a loving home, isn't it?" ”This does not give a direct answer, but also leaves room for the imagination of the other party, and at the same time subtly emphasizes family values. After all, happiness is not about size, but about mentality.
So, how do you say goodbye to those irrelevant comparisons without being rude, and at the same time not let your in-laws think that you are perfunctory to them?
When the in-laws sit together and the conversation turns to their precious children, the atmosphere often becomes subtle.
Making complaints and comparisons the main content of communication is like cooking with sand, which seems to be enough, but in fact it is difficult to swallow.
Complaining about the behavior of the other party's children is undoubtedly dropping a ** bomb in the relationship between the in-laws. It may inadvertently blow up an otherwise harmonious relationship to pieces.
Worse still, it can also affect the marriage of the children, because no one wants to hear their parents speak ill of their partner behind their backs.
Respect and understanding are indispensable glues in family relationships. Try to put yourself in the other person's shoes and understand their struggles and challenges.
It is also necessary to be cautious in dealing with the problems in the marriage of children. In the face of the flaws in the marriage of their children, they should not immediately become "educators" and "teach a lesson" to their in-laws.
Instead, you can offer some constructive advice or work together to find a solution to your problem. For example, when there is a dispute in the marriage of children, you can work together on how to cultivate communication skills between husband and wife, instead of blindly accusing each other of having problems with family education.
In this uncertain world, there is no perfect child and no absolutely correct parenting method.
Every parent is busy for the happiness of their children, and the mutual understanding and support between relatives and families can sometimes create miracles more than alchemy.
But if the understanding and respect between the in-laws and the family no longer exists, how will we create a healthy marriage environment for our children?
Finding a boundary between in-laws that is neither overly intrusive nor indifferent is like making a psychological balance beam: if you are not careful, you may change from an angel of concern to a devil of interference. Of course, no in-laws would blatantly declare: "I'm here to interfere in your life today!" ”
Sometimes, however, an unintentional inquiry or a well-intentioned suggestion can be interpreted as an invasion of private life.
Inappropriate interference can not only make people feel on pins and needles, but it can also put a good relationship in jeopardy. If you don't respond inappropriately, it may lead to endless shortcomings in parents and even affect your children's emotional life.
Maintaining proper boundaries while maintaining a parent-child relationship is an art. The key is how to skillfully draw a circle that does not make the in-laws feel excluded or snooped.
For example, when your in-laws are curious about your family's financial situation, you may want to change the subject: "How about we talk about the children's education another day?" ”Such answers are tactful and funny, and can effectively avoid sensitive topics without hurting the peace.
The communication between relatives should be like watering a plant, neither too much water and drowning, nor too little water and making it thirsty to death.
For example, if a child has an argument with his partner, he can ask: "When two people are together, friction is always inevitable, have you tried some kind of communication skills?" Such an offer not only shows concern for them, but also avoids direct intervention.
In this process, creating a harmonious relationship between family and family is like cooking a delicate dish, which requires patience and wisdom. Because everyone craves respect, every family wants to maintain their own intimate space.
The family is a magical little universe, and sometimes the stars in it collide with each other, shining with dazzling but dangerous sparks.
In this small universe, every family has one or two things that are not so glamorous, like old antiques at home, which people love and hate. However, when these things are brought to public, it is like showing your underwear on social **, which is embarrassing and unnecessary.
The key to how to deal with internal problems without damaging the image of the family is to turn "family ugliness" into "family rules".
At the same time, the transmission of positive energy is crucial in shaping children's positive attitude. In the face of difficulties and challenges, if parents can show an optimistic attitude, then it is easier for children to learn to face the twists and turns of life.
In in-laws or social situations, emphasize the positive aspects of the family, such as a child's small achievements or happy moments in the familyIt can create a positive family image and also send a positive message to the children.
In this uncertain society, the family remains the safest haven. Whether it's protecting financial privacy, building trust between parents, handling children's issues, and maintaining family dignity, all these are the cornerstones of building a harmonious family relationship.
Through clever conversation skills and maintaining appropriate boundaries in our private lives, we can find a balance between respecting and being respected, while also being able to transmit positive energy to our children.
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