Many parents are complaining that their children are becoming more disobedient and difficult to manage as they grow older, especially after entering adolescence.
As soon as they got home, they locked themselves in their rooms, did not communicate with their parents, and did not allow their parents to enter their rooms.
Zhao Liting, a teacher from Kyushu Jinbang Family Education, said: "The door of an adolescent child is the most difficult door in the world to open. A door that closes borders, and what is needed is respect." Only when parents read the signal can they better break the game.
First: the mind begins to be independent and needs its own space.
The closed door is actually a signal from the child to the parents. "I have grown up and have my own sense of independence, I want my own space, and I want to be understood and respected by you."
If parents do not understand and regard their children's independence as rebellion, then the only thing that awaits them is their children's confrontation.
Second: Evade parental supervision and do whatever you want.
Children are naturally curious about the outside world, especially in adolescence, when the child's sense of independence begins to awaken, and the curiosity is even stronger.
As soon as they get home, they focus on everything they are interested in, and they don't want to be disturbed, especially by their parents.
What to read, learn Xi, and write homework, it's not that they don't know the importance, but that they are weak-willed during this period, and they are more greedy for frolicking and having fun than the brain-squenging Xi tasks!
Third: Use the space to do what you love.
Although learning Xi is a big event in life, there are still many children who do not let go of their hobbies and hobbies, and use the time they should have Xi to develop their hobbies, which can not only improve the efficiency of learning Xi, but also educate and entertain.
Some parents are very supportive, thinking that cultivating hobbies can not only cultivate self-cultivation, but also develop children's amateur talents. But there are still many parents who can't understand it, thinking that it will take up their children's Xi time to learn and criticize their children's behavior.
How to break the game?First: don't ask for help, respond to requests.
Parents should respect their children's needs for self-development and give their children more trust and space. Don't force your child to approach when she doesn't need it, and don't ask for help, which means that she can solve it on her own.
However, this does not mean that parents completely ignore it, parents should convey to their children that you are there for them at all times. On the basis of respect, give the child a sense of security, so that the child can go through adolescence smoothly.
Second: Respect children and establish a sense of boundaries.
After the child enters adolescence, parents should change their education methods, especially to establish a good sense of boundaries and respect the child's sense of independence.
Children are not allowed to touch their things and enter the child's room at will, so they know how to show weakness to the child, so that the child can put away the hostile spikes.
Third: Accept reality.
The separation of children from their parents is a necessary process and a sign of their maturity. Instead of confrontation, it is better to calm down and accept the facts.
Your child is not your child!They are the children born of life's desire for itself. They came to this world through you, but they did not come because of you, they are with you, but they do not belong to you!You can give them your love, but never your thoughts.
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