Parents have different attitudes towards their children's "crying" and "not crying", some parents feel that their children cry at every turn, weak and incompetent, while some parents are worried that their children will not cry and hurt their hearts. However, there are three distinct gaps between these two types of children when they grow up: emotional management, psychological preparedness mechanisms, and physical and mental health. This article will discuss the differences between these three aspects and how parents can reasonably guide their children's emotional expression to promote their healthy growth.
Children who cry at every turn, such as Xiao Ming, are able to express their emotions normally. He will tell the teacher or parents in time that he has been bullied or wronged, and ask for help and justice. Xiao Ming is sensible and good at communication and expression, his emotions are relatively stable, and he even acts as a teacher's assistant in the class.
In contrast, children who endure and don't cry, such as Xiaoyue, often hide their grievances and sadness in their hearts, and are not good at expressing and communicating with others. As a child, she was reprimanded for frequent crying, which caused her to be afraid of tears and unable to release her emotions and pain. However, crying is a way for children to vent their emotions in the face of difficulties and setbacks, and proper crying can release negative emotions and avoid them from accumulating in their hearts.
Xiao Ming is a kind and sensitive little boy, but he is also a person who is vulnerable and wronged. Whenever something unfair happened to him, tears would involuntarily remain. Each of these crystal teardrops represents the pain and dissatisfaction in his heart. However, Xiao Ming's tears are not a symbol of weakness and incompetence, on the contrary, they are part of his healthy growth.
When Xiao Ming finds himself being bullied or wronged, he learns to react reasonably to it. He will find a teacher or a parent to be honest about his feelings and ask for help and support. He doesn't keep problems in his heart and let them ferment inside, but actively works with others to solve them. This positive way of managing emotions has made Xiao Ming highly appreciated in the class and has become a powerful assistant to the teacher.
In contrast, Xiaoyue is an introverted and silent girl. Although she has also experienced many unfairness and grievances, she never sheds tears, and she does not even confide in her parents and teachers. The reason is that when she was a child, when she cried frequently, she was severely reprimanded by her mother, which caused her to have a fear of crying in her heart.
However, not crying does not mean that you are strong and brave inside. On the contrary, Xiaoyue carries the pain in her heart every day, but she can't talk about it. She always suffers silently by herself, and is not good at expressing her emotions and needs. This emotional inhibition can cause her to feel insecure, feel alienated from others, and find it difficult to build deep relationships. Inner depression will also gradually accumulate, negatively affecting her physical and mental health.
When it comes to building friendships with others, people are more inclined to choose people who are cheerful and sincere. These people have a high degree of affinity, are able to open the hearts of others, and are willing to make friends with others. In contrast, reticent people tend to appear lonely, and it is not easy to understand their personalities and preferences even after working with them for a long time. They protect themselves through a psychological defense mechanism and keep a certain distance from others.
Children who cry at every turn are often good at releasing their stress and negative emotions. They express their emotions without reservation, liking or hating is liking or hating, and there is no defense. In contrast, children who don't cry since childhood are accustomed to hiding their emotions and rarely show joy and sorrow on their faces. They are always mentally vigilant, not easy to contact with others, and lack a sense of security.
Xiao Ming is a cheerful and sincere child, he always shines in the class with energy. His carefree personality and optimistic attitude have earned him many friends. Whether it is classmates or teachers, they are melted by Xiao Ming's enthusiasm and are willing to become good friends with him.
Ming's friends love to share their joys and troubles with him because he is always willing to listen, understand and support. He is interested in the people around him and likes to take the initiative to communicate with them, thus building sincere friendships. He doesn't need psychological defenses to protect himself because he believes that sincere communication with others can lead to more happiness and growth.
In contrast, Xiaoyue is a lonely and introverted child. She always does things silently by herself and doesn't like to communicate with others. Whether it is a classmate or a teacher, it is difficult to understand her inner world. Although she behaves sensibly in her class, she always maintains a certain sense of distance and does not easily form deep friendships with others.
Xiaoyue's psychological defense mechanism makes her feel alienated from the people around her. She is not good at expressing her emotions and needs, and as a result, it is difficult for others to really understand her. Her isolation may have left her feeling lonely and insecure, unable to enjoy the joy and support that comes with being around others.
Children who cry a lot and are allowed to cry are emotionally accepted by their parents. Every time they cry, parents will soothe their children in time and meet their needs. This allows children to learn to release their emotions without letting negative emotions accumulate in their hearts and negatively affect their physical and mental health.
In contrast, children who endure not to cry or are even allowed to cry do not mean that they are obedient and sensible. In fact, these children don't know how to release their emotions. When they encounter sadness, grievance, or sadness, they tend to suppress their emotions and accumulate in their hearts. As negative emotions accumulate, their physical and mental health can be compromised. They may even have an emotional breakdown when they face greater difficulties.
To sum up, parents should treat their children's emotional expressions rationally, neither too permissively nor too harshly. Reasonable guidance of children's emotional expression is conducive to their good emotional management, healthy psychological defense mechanism and healthy physical and mental growth.
First, parents can support their children's emotional expressions by listening and understanding. When a child is in tears, parents should first give the child comfort and comfort before listening to their feelings and needs. This can help children feel accepted and understood, reducing the backlog of negative emotions.
Second, parents should teach their children positive ways to manage their emotions. They can encourage children to find their own ways to vent their emotions, such as journaling, drawing, exercising, etc. At the same time, parents also need to be role models for their children's good emotional management, and lead by example, so that children can learn to cope with and release their emotions effectively.
Finally, parents should also pay attention to nurturing their children's emotional intelligence. They can teach children to recognize and understand their own emotions, learn to communicate and communicate with others, and problem-solving skills. By improving children's emotional intelligence, they are better able to cope with challenges and adversity and maintain physical and mental health.
In short, it is essential to guide children's emotional expression reasonably for their healthy development. Parents should respect their children's emotions, understand their needs, and guide and educate them in an appropriate way. Only in this way can children achieve all-round development in emotional management, psychological preparedness mechanisms, and physical and mental health.