First of all, let's talk about the widespread phenomenon of "grandma with baby" in society. According to a survey, the highest proportion of candidates with babies in the family is grandma, as high as 439%, while Bao Ma and Grandma accounted for 27 each5% and 147%。The reason behind this phenomenon is also very simple, on the one hand, the daughter is worried about the conflict between her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, so she takes the initiative to ask her mother to come over, and on the other hand, it is also because the grandparents are naturally happy to see it happen when they see someone helping to take care of the child. Grandma has gradually become the "main force" with children, and they can often be seen in activities with children in the community, and it is also because many grandmothers say that their daughters and sons-in-law are busy with work and pay off the mortgage every month, so they help take care of the children out of peace of mind. In addition, some grandmothers said that when they were pregnant, their daughters asked them to come over to help with confinement and take care of the children, so they also felt that they could not live up to their daughters' expectations. Looking at it this way, we can understand why grandma has become the first choice of mothers.
Next, we want to ** why Bao Ma put forward the reason of "conditions permit, don't let grandma take the baby". First of all, the direct communication between mother and daughter leads to emotional damage. When communicating with her mother, her mother often speaks too directly and lacks understanding and respect. The mother may not be aware of the psychological damage caused by her words. The old man left his homeland and came to the city to help take care of the children, and he was very lonely in his heart, coupled with his daughter's direct reprimand, which made the old man feel aggrieved and didn't know who to go to complain to. Secondly, the mother may treat her mother as a nanny, completely entrusting her to take care of the children and do housework, and she does not care about the psychological thoughts of the elderly. Treating the mother in this way for a long time will make the old man feel very aggrieved and unhappy, and if he meets a soft-hearted old man, he may bear it silently. Third, grandma is more worried and tired with the baby. As a mother, I don't want to live up to my daughter's expectations, so I will be very careful when taking care of my children, but when I am older, my physical energy is limited, and I will feel powerless. In the end, the grandmother paid a lot, and it was difficult to please her son-in-law. Bao's mother usually has high requirements for her mother, but she has some scruples about her mother-in-law, which makes her son-in-law want her mother to come over to help. Some grandmothers work hard to take care of their children every day, but their sons-in-law are not even willing to call "Mom", which may make the elderly feel sad.
In short, many grandmothers now help to take care of the baby out of concern and help for their daughters. But mothers should also care more about and understand grandma, be more tolerant and less emotionally confrontational. It is not easy to take care of children, whether it is the in-laws or the parents, they are all paid for our good. As children, we need to learn to be grateful, and at the same time, we need to readjust our roles and responsibilities to make the whole family more harmonious. Mothers can consider sharing some housework and parenting responsibilities with their husbands to reduce pressure on grandma and give themselves and their children more time to spend with them. At the same time, Bao Ma can communicate and communicate with her grandmother more actively, understand her mood and needs, and respect her choices and wishes. If the financial conditions allow, you can also consider hiring some professional childcare helpers or nannies to help share the workload of your grandmother, so that your grandmother can have more rest time and personal space. Most importantly, we should be truly grateful for our grandmother's dedication, express our love and gratitude to them, and make them feel important and valued. Only on the basis of mutual understanding and concern can families be more harmonious and happy.