In the process of growing up, we will encounter many problems that we cannot solve by ourselves. When we were young, we had elders to help, and most of that help was done with kindness. But once we ourselves reach middle age, things change. Human beings belong to a social species, and they cannot survive without the power of the group. In other words, people need to communicate with other people in order to be integrated into society. Once the communication activities are carried out, it means that there is a problem involving human feelings. When you become an adult, there is no need for others to uphold the principle of respecting the old and loving the young to help you for free, only if you help me and I help you, can we form a good relationship with each other. In order to make our own life path smoother, it is necessary to leave multiple relationships, which may not be necessary now, but it is too late to conclude a relationship when the problem really arises.
We must know that problems should be prevented in advance, and these favors are an additional layer of protection when facing hardships in the future. And this has led to different views on human relations, and some people's views on human accidents are very one-sided. They believe that the sophistication of human affection is a dinner, and if you treat yourself a few more times, this favor will naturally exist. As the saying goes, "eating people with a short mouth" is not unreasonable, but this is by no means the whole picture of human affection, and real human relations are by no means just about eating. Many things are negotiated at the dinner table, and this result may make many people misunderstand that eating is the main body of interpersonal interactions, but in fact, this view is too one-sided and ignores the real subject. The most important thing to build a good relationship is to make other people owe you something. Since ancient times, personal debts have been the most difficult to repay. If you invite someone to have a meal, there will be no such thing as "the grace of a meal", so the effect is very small.
What we need to do is to analyze what our friend wants or is facing, and provide meaningful and necessary help, for example, if his parents are sick and can't queue up to go to the hospital, this situation is urgent. If you can help solve this problem, he will think of your benefits, and when you ask him to help later, he will not refuse, this is a human accident, not a fundamental purpose of eating. Again, this is the first point we want to make, to provide meaningful and necessary help. If the other person can easily solve the problem, then the value you create is very small, and even if you ask others to help, it is easy to be rejected. Only when a friend can't solve a situation or a situation that is difficult to solve in the short term, you have a solution, so that others can owe you favors, and a good cycle of borrowing and repaying can be formed in the future. As for the second type, it is not to talk about the rights and wrongs of friends.
For interpersonal relationships, giving face to friends in front of people and not talking about the shortcomings of friends after people is a great plus for the other party. Each of us expects to meet such a friend, and for friends who often spread rumors, we will lack a sense of trust in our hearts, and if you can do this, you will have a high affinity, and friends will naturally cherish the relationship more. Because the relationship you create through this will be very harmonious, so once you face any problem, friends will basically provide some help, and those who can do this are usually very good friends, and many times can think from the other person's point of view. Once you have friends who can come to this level, you must cherish each other's fate and maintain your interpersonal relationships, which is a powerful guarantee in the face of hardships in the future, and will definitely provide you with unexpected surprises.
The last kind is that we make friends with others, the most important thing is feelings, making friends with the idea of interests, and in the end almost all of them are friends with wine and meat, making friends first and making hearts, which is the most basic and most important point. For us, a friend should be a group that can listen to the troubles and share the victory. They have independent thinking and awareness, and they may have a rift in our relationship because of some small things, and we need to mend it carefully. In a friendship, we are the listeners of each other's troubles and the sharers of each other's joys. Many times these favors will not come in handy in the end, and since this is the case, it is actually better to go with the flow. The purpose of our friendship should be pure, we want to share our joy and tell our troubles, this reason is sufficient, human favors are left unconsciously, and the deliberate human favors often turn out to be unsatisfactory.
Therefore, in daily life, we must pay attention to the establishment of interpersonal relationships, but we must pay attention to the compatibility between the other party and ourselves.