I didn't dare tell anyone around me what I heard from my cousin when I went home to the grave
Zhang Xin was born in a quiet village in Gansu Province. From the time she first understood the world, fate did not favor her.
In Zhang Xin's memory, her parents never seemed to love her by her side, and they became a touch of loneliness in her heart. However, behind this indifference, there is an aunt, Zhang Meifang, who is a warm light in Zhang Xin's life. Zhang Meifang cared for her meticulously, bought clothes for her, loved her taste buds, combed her hair, and told her rich stories.
Therefore, an indestructible emotional bond was built between Zhang Xin and her aunt.
However, rumors in the neighborhood came that Zhang Xin's mother had left home after the 100-day expiration of her life. The reason is that Zhang Xin's father is too addicted to alcohol, and he often hits Zhang Xin's mother after drinking. Rumors even say that Zhang Xin's mother was beaten by her father when she was pregnant, which almost led to a miscarriage. Fortunately, Zhang Meifang arrived in time to rescue her sister-in-law, thus saving a tragedy.
Sometimes, Zhang Xin feels that her aunt is her guardian angel. But deep down in her heart, the longing for her biological parents has never gone away.
Despite this, Zhang Xin understands that there are some things that cannot be forced. As a result, she has always behaved very sensible. When she was in elementary school, Zhang Xin not only excelled in academics, but was also well-behaved and sensible in housework. She silently swept the floor, did the laundry, and did her best to share the burden of the family.
When Zhang Meifang worriedly advised her to stop doing housework, Zhang Xin replied with a smile: "Auntie, aren't you also doing laundry?" But your hands look so delicate and beautiful. ”
Looking at Zhang Xin's sensibility, Zhang Meifang was both relieved and sad.
Zhang Meifang often sighs that how such an outstanding girl fell into a family like her brother and sister-in-law.
One is obsessed with liquor licenses all day long and disregards family responsibilities; The other only cares about himself when he divorces, and even entangles with other men before the child is weaned.
It's a couple who are really set up by chance.
Sometimes, Zhang Meifang fantasizes that it would be nice if Zhang Xin was her biological daughter.
That way, she would be able to educate her on her own without any worries.
But the reality is cruel, she can only do her best to take care of Zhang Xin, and helplessly face Zhang Xin's brother-in-law Zhou Jun.
Although the husband never said anything explicitly, sometimes he still had a look of displeasure on his face.
And his son Zhou Cheng is even more of a headache.
Zhou Cheng often deliberately said in front of Zhou Jun: "Dad, look at Mom, it's better for Zhang Xin than for me." Who is her biological child? ”
Every now and then, Zhou Jun's face would become extremely ugly.
Although Zhang Meifang has told Zhou Cheng many times that Zhang Xin is his sister, and her background is unfortunate.
Whenever something happened, Zhou Cheng was still jealous of Zhang Xin.
In fact, Zhang Meifang always prepares things for her two children when she buys, and the food she cooks has always been double.
Even if there was only one apple left, she generously cut it in half for her two children.
But Zhou Cheng never seemed satisfied.
Zhou Cheng always said that if there was no Zhang Xin, everything in the house would be his. Since he had Zhang Xin, everything had to be given to her in half, and he was unhappy.
Zhang Meifang didn't know how to educate Zhou Cheng, so she could only favor Zhou Cheng more later.
Fortunately, Zhang Xin never cares about these.
On the contrary, she often behaves very sensibly, saying: "Aunt, uncle, cousin, you are so good to me, I will definitely remember it, and I will repay you well when I grow up." ”
Sometimes, this kind of sensibility will make Zhou Jun moved.
Zhou Jun compared his trouble-causing son, and felt that Zhang Xin was really sensible.
As the two children grew up, Zhou Jun and Zhang Meifang both liked Zhang Xin more.
This made Zhou Cheng's dislike for Zhang Xin deeper.
Zhang Xin is in the fifth grade of primary school, and she is already able to cook for the whole family on her own.
At the same time, Zhou Cheng is still obsessed with things like digging birds' nests and hitting birds with slingshots.
Whenever she tasted the food made by Zhang Xin herself, and then looked at Zhou Cheng who was covered in mud, Zhang Meifang's anger was difficult to suppress.
Every time Zhang Meifang scolded Zhou Cheng, Zhang Xin always tried to calm the dispute on the sidelines.
The more Zhang Xin was like this, the more Zhou Cheng became disgusted with her.
Zhang Xin knows this.
But what can she do?
Zhang Xin's father, Zhang Guodong, is only at home for two or three days a month.
And in just a few days, he will also fall into the abyss of alcohol.
Sometimes, Zhang Xin wants to communicate with his father, but he can only hear him snoring like thunder.
Zhang Xin wanted to speak and stopped, and the communication with his father was always impossible to develop.
As a result, she no longer looks forward to heart-to-heart communication with her father.
The only thing I can do is try my best to please my aunt's family.
She takes on all the responsibilities she can such as cooking, laundry, cleaning, etc.
Zhang Xin understands that her aunt's kindness to her comes from family affection, and her uncle has no obligation.
Therefore, she tried not to embarrass Zhang Meifang.
Zhang Xin's life lasted until she graduated from junior high school, and then she entered high school.
Zhang Guodong paid half of the high school tuition, and Zhang Meifang paid the other half. Zhou Jun was quite unhappy with this.
Zhang Xin said to his uncle with a pitiful attitude: "Uncle, I will return this money to you in the future." ”
Zhou Jun looked at Zhang Xin's pitiful appearance, felt pity, and finally agreed to her request.
Once in high school, Zhang Xin realized that her situation had become more difficult.
In elementary and junior high school, Ms. Zhang was known for her outstanding academic performance, so no one made fun of her, even though everyone knew about her family's situation.
As soon as he arrived in high school, Zhang Xin's Xi grades began to decline.
It's not because she doesn't work hard, it's because the academic pressure of high school makes her feel overwhelmed.
In fact, Zhang Xin has been working hard for herself.
In an environment with a total of eight people in a dormitory, Zhang Xin always leaves early and returns late. While others were gossiping, she was immersed in Xi. Strangely, however, the results have not been able to go up.
As time passed, Zhang Xin gradually fell into a mood of inferiority.
As a result, when she was in high school, Zhang Xin's circle of friends became quite narrow.
In those years, she was under tremendous pressure, and her whole state was not optimistic, hovering on the verge of depression every day.
In the year when Zhang Xin was in his second year of high school, Zhou Jun found a job for Zhou Cheng in the county seat.
That day, Zhou Jun took Zhou Cheng and Zhang Xin out to dine together.
Zhou Jun said to Zhou Cheng and asked him to care more about Zhang Xin.
Zhou Cheng agreed with a smile.
After careful calculation, Zhou Cheng has been working in other places for three years.
In the past three years, Zhang Xin and Zhou Cheng have met only a handful of times.
Looking at Zhou Cheng's sincere smile, Zhang Xin's heart warmed.
After all, they grew up together, how could there be too much resentment?
In other words, Zhang Xin has always been grateful to her aunt's family, including Zhou Cheng.
Therefore, on that day, Zhang Xin thought that Zhou Cheng had long forgotten the trivial matters of quarreling when he was a child.
In the days that followed, Zhou Cheng did often find Zhang Xin and buy her food, like a considerate big brother.
Zhang Xin's life is full of joy.
Soon, the tense moment of the third year of high school came.
Zhang Xin's pressure has become even greater.
During that period, Zhou Cheng asked Zhang Xin out to eat more and more frequently.
In the first monthly exam of the third year of high school, Zhang Xin's grades were quite bad.
In the face of such results, she could not enter the second book, so she could only choose to go to junior college.
Thinking of her aunt's kindness to her, Zhang Xin silently shed tears.
On that day, Zhou Cheng found Zhang Xin again.
He saw Zhang Xin's eyes redden, so he asked her what had happened.
Zhang Xin poured out her anxiety to Zhou Cheng, rolling out like beans.
After hearing this, Zhou Cheng said indifferently: "I thought it was a big deal, but it turned out that I just didn't do well in the exam." Look at me, my grades have been bad since I was a child, and now I'm not doing well. ”
As he spoke, he handed Zhang Xin a glass of wine.
Afterwards, Zhou Cheng picked up the wine glass and said, "Come, how to solve your worries, only Du Kang." Have a drink and wake up and you're still a good student. ”
That night, Zhang Xin drank a lot of beer, so much so that she couldn't remember that two more people came in Zhou Cheng's rental house.
That night, Zhang Xin felt unwell in her dream, but she was drunk and hazy and couldn't wake up.
When she woke up the next morning, Zhang Xin realized that she had been violated the night before.
She was ashamed and angry, but she didn't know how to vent.
got dressed aggrievedly and found Zhou Cheng angrily.
After Zhou Cheng saw Zhang Xin, he said as if nothing had happened: "You wake up, today is Saturday, you don't have to go to school." If you want to eat something, I'll take you there, I was unhappy last night because I didn't take the exam, it's not a big deal. ”
Zhou Cheng looked calm, as if he didn't know anything about what was happening.
Zhang Xin looked at him, his heart was full of hesitation, and he couldn't ask directly.
Just when Zhang Xin was helpless, Zhou Cheng took the initiative to speak. He told Zhang Xin that last night after she fell asleep, two of his friends came and he put her on the bed, and then the three of them drank freely, and eventually he also drank too much. When they left in the morning, Zhang Xin and his two friends had not yet woken up. He asked Zhang Xin if he had seen them when he got up.
Zhang Xin was shocked in her heart.
It turned out that that day, when she returned to the rental house to help Zhou Cheng change the sheets, something like this happened.
This is an extremely shameful thing for her.
She couldn't confide in anyone, so she had to bear it in silence.
Since then, every night, Zhang Xin has woken up.
In order to make herself sleep, she had to work harder to devote herself to Xi.
Exhausted, only then can she fall asleep while she goes to bed.
That experience became a secret that Zhang Xin was reluctant to talk about.
In the end, the third year of high school was over, and Zhang Xin was admitted to a decent university.
College tuition is not an easy burden for rural families.
In order to help Zhang Xin, Zhang Meifang helped her apply for a student loan.
On the day she sent Zhang Xin to school, Zhang Meifang said to her: "You study hard, my aunt will rely on you in the future, and I can't count on your brother." ”
As soon as Zhang Xin mentioned Zhou Cheng, he couldn't help but get nervous.
The events of that day came back to her mind again.
Zhang Xin could only barely hide the sadness in her heart, and she nodded lightly.
Zhang Xin chose to study at a university in Suzhou, and when she first arrived in Suzhou, she seemed to have stepped into a new world and felt new about everything.
After gradually getting acquainted with the school environment and life, Zhang Xin began to look for part-time opportunities.
The first time she got a part-time salary, she happily bought a beautiful cheongsam for her aunt.
Seeing her aunt wearing this gift and displaying it in **, Zhang Xin's mood was like a blooming flower, full of happiness.
Little did she know that this would be her last gift to her aunt.
During the winter vacation of her freshman year, in order to skip some fares and save some pocket money, Zhang Xin decided not to go home.
At the beginning of the second semester, she received the sad news of her aunt's sudden death.
In the car home, Zhang Xin's mind was full of thoughts of her aunt.
Zhang Xin was often sick because of malnutrition when she was a child, and her aunt silently guarded her every time. Every holiday, my aunt will buy new clothes for Zhou Cheng, and Zhang Xin always has a share.
Her aunt's handmade cool skin is Zhang Xin's favorite, and although the production process is cumbersome, as long as time permits, her aunt will always make a copy for her.
When Zhang Xin experienced her first menstrual period, she felt very scared, and her aunt taught her to use sanitary napkins correctly in a gentle way.
Zhang Xin's physical development is slightly faster than her peers, so her aunt bought suitable underwear for her early.
At that time, her aunt also told her: "Girls, you can not be particular about anything, but you must choose underwear well, otherwise you will be easy to get sick." ”
Zhang Xinwan never expected that her aunt, who was only fifty years old, would leave so suddenly.
The day after Zhang Xin returned home, her aunt was buried.
After her aunt's funeral, everyone in the family returned to their respective residences, but Zhang Xin was the only one who stayed.
An old woman walked up to Zhang Xin with concern, took her hand and comforted: "Child, come home with me, how scared you are at night when you are alone here." ”
Zhang Xin responded in a hoarse voice: "My aunt is here, what do I have to be afraid of." ”
So, that night, Zhang Xin quietly stood in front of her aunt's grave.
The moonlight sprinkled on the earth, and the frost shone brightly in the reflection of the moonlight.
In this soft moonlight, the ** on the aunt's tombstone is clearly visible, and the aunt's face is still kind.
Due to her sudden death, Zhang Meifang did not leave any last words.
Since then, Zhang Xin has only returned home once a year during Qingming Festival.
Because of the loss of Zhang Meifang, for Zhang Xin, home is no longer home.
During the Qingming Festival this year, Zhang Xin still brought a bunch of things home as in previous years.
Before leaving, she carefully checked her father's wine, her uncle's clothes and shoes, and Zhou Cheng's cigarettes and shoes.
Looking at this pile of items, Zhang Xin felt empty inside. Now, she has the ability to be good to everyone, but she can't be good to the people who once loved her the most.
In previous years, when she got off the bus, Zhang Xin would go to visit her aunt first.
The things she brought back this year were too heavy, so she decided to put down her belongings first and then visit her aunt.
Because Zhang Guodong is not at home all the year round, the house has already become a dilapidated house.
Zhang Xin went straight to her aunt's house.
The acacia tree in front of Zhang Meifang's house has grown very tall, and Zhang Xin remembers that the tree was planted when she was in elementary school.
At that time, my aunt said that when this little tree grows up, Shin Shin will be able to make money.
Today, the trees are tall and lush, and Zhang Xin is able to earn money on her own. However, the man who planted the tree is no longer alive.
Zhang Xin, who was a little tired from walking, decided to take a break under the tree. As soon as she sat down, she heard the sound of conversation coming from the room behind the tree.
On this day, Zhang Xin accidentally learned the truth about an unknown incident in his junior year of high school.
It turned out that the key person turned out to be Zhou Cheng.
Zhou Cheng seemed to be responding to the person next to him, claiming: "She has enjoyed the benefits of my family for so many years, why should I get some sleep." ”
Zhang Xin's heart was shocked.
Thinking back to that time of helplessness and fear, she felt as if her heart was being clenched.
Zhang Xin relied on his remaining sanity and turned on the recording function of his mobile phone.
When the conversation and laughter in the room ended, Zhang Xin angrily opened the door curtain.
The people in the house, including Zhou Cheng, were all taken aback, and then said with a smile: "Xinxin is back." ”
Zhang Xin angrily revealed to Zhou Cheng that she had just heard what he said, and that she had recorded it and was about to call the police.
The person next to him was busy mediating and said that he could have a good talk.
But Zhang Xin was already angry and refused to give up.
Seeing this, Zhou Cheng seemed a little indifferent, and said lightly: "If you have something to say, you can say it." ”
Then call the police and let the police arrest me to see if my mother can rest in peace under Jiuquan. "
You're going to take my mother's kindness to you all those years as air?You want to send her only day to prison. "
These words made Zhang Xin fall silent.
Naturally, the aunt did not want to see her son in prison.
Zhang Xin, who was in a mess in her heart, did not go to worship her aunt, but went back to Suzhou by car.
During this time, Zhang Xin was in a depressed mood, and friends around her asked her what happened and why she was so depressed.
She really couldn't tell anyone about it.
She couldn't tell what she had heard in her hometown.
She couldn't even say what her cousin had done to her.
When the May Day holiday came, Zhang Xin received a ** from Zhou Jun. At that end, Zhou Jun told her an important news: next month, Zhou Cheng will enter the palace of marriage, and he strongly asked Zhang Xin to go back to participate in this special moment.
Faced with this request, Zhang Xin felt in a dilemma. She didn't know how to politely refuse Zhou Jun. After all, when she was once helpless, her uncle did not stop her aunt from caring for her. Her uncle played an important role in her life and was her benefactor.
Therefore, for Zhang Xin, this request carries a mixed emotion. She thought about how to refuse Zhou Jun and keep her choice without hurting her feelings.
To Zhang Xin's surprise, the son of the benefactor she once regarded as an angel actually spoke disrespectfully to her.
Faced with this unbelievable development that seems to be the plot of a TV series, Zhang Xin can't help but feel sad and funny.
For the last few nights, Zhang Xin has been tossing and turning, unable to sleep, and she is at a loss as to what attitude to take.
For Zhang Xin, her aunt has always been an angelic existence in her heart. However, who would have thought that this angel would actually give birth to an unexpected demon.