Many people spend their entire lives without confronting their true vision and needs, and end up living in a state of aimless confusion. As interlocutors, we always have a tendency to be confused by the problem at hand. When bothered by a problem, we are used to recognizing it first and then figuring out how to solve it. But the human mind is complex, and the causes of problems are often more than one. Once we only focus on what is in front of us, we are likely to lose ourselves.
Therefore, it is also a good choice to start with the other person's vision, if we don't even understand the other person's life goals, then it may be the opposite, and the other person's vision can show you the way. Here's an example of what I practice a lot. I told the other person, "Imagine a concrete and beautiful scene where you feel happy and fulfilled when you are immersed in it." ”
If you are a person with a high sensitivity trait, imagining such a scenario will be easy for you, but you should also be aware that it may not be so easy for others, or even an impossible task. If the other person is having a hard time completing the task, you can use your empathetic expertise and try to give her some advice on how to imagine the following scenario:
Your husband has told you that it is a great honor for him to marry you.
You sing in a chorus.
From morning till night, you have a whole day at your disposal.
Your boss praises you for a job well done.
Mother caresses your hair.
Let your imagination run wild and give your advice based on the other person's specific situation. If the other person agrees with one or more of the proposals, then the real needs of his heart are clear at a glance.
If this exercise doesn't work and the real needs of the other person's heart remain an unsolved mystery, then perhaps feelings of jealousy can help you solve the mystery. For example, ask him about scenes that evoke jealousy, and perhaps the answer to the puzzle is hidden.