Du Yuesheng, who has been in Shanghai for nearly 30 years, has a wise saying: "Life must eat three bowls of noodles, one is decent, the second is the scene, and the third is love." "Three bowls of noodles are combined into one bowl of noodles, which is "face".
Chinese people are very particular about face, so "give me face" is probably the most common phrase heard by every Chinese.
We have to admit that, based on a lot of reliable experience, many times relying on face can indeed accomplish a lot of things.
At the end of the Eastern Han Dynasty, the heroes rose together and fought for the world. Yuan Shu first formed a family with Lu Bu, and then sent the general Ji Ling to attack Liu Bei.
Liu Bei was besieged by Ji Ling's army in Xiaopei, and when he was in danger, he asked Lu Bu for help.
Lu Bu was worried that after Liu Bei's demise, his lips would be cold, but because he was married to Yuan Shu in front, it was not good to directly send troops to help Liu Bei relieve the siege, so he decided to mediate.
Lu Bu first led a large army to camp on the outskirts of Xiaopei City, and then gave a banquet to the generals of Ji Ling. He asked the sergeant to erect a halberd in the barracks, and then made a bet with Ji Ling and the others: "Liu Bei was originally my brother who worshipped him, and he was besieged by you today, but I don't like to quarrel with people." So that if I can shoot the sprig of the halberd, you will withdraw your troops;If you miss, then I don't care if you kill Liu Bei. ”
He opened his bow and set up an arrow, and he hit the branch of the halberd.
The generals were shocked. The so-called "Lu Bu among people, red rabbit among horses", Lu Bu was originally the first brave general in the world, plus he showed such a hand on the scene, and there were tens of thousands of troops behind him, Ji Ling and others had no choice but to quit.
Liu Bei's crisis was resolved.
The most important reason why Lu Bu was able to do this was that he had enough face.
often says "give face", often think very highly of yourself. When a person says "give face" to others, it is tantamount to saying, "I am so important, you have to listen to me!".”
However, many times, we may not be as important as we think we are.
Mr. Ying Ruocheng, an art superstar of the older generation in China, once told such a story.
He was born into a large family, and when he was a child, many people ate at the same table. One day, on a whim, he hid himself in a cupboard while eating, wanting to see if everyone was in a hurry because they couldn't find him. But until everyone finished eating, no one noticed that there was no one missing from the table. He had to crawl out of the cupboard on his own, but all that awaited him was some leftovers.
The reality is that we may not be as heavy as we think in the eyes of others.
Since it's not that important, you shouldn't always ask others to "give face".
Back to the opening story.
Later, Cao Cao defeated Lü Bu and prepared to execute him at the foot of the White Gate. Lu Buyang begged Liu Bei: "For the sake of my face in the past when I shot a halberd to save you, help me plead in front of Cao Cao." Originally, Cao Cao, out of cherishing talents, also had the intention to let Lu Bu go, so he was short of a suitable reason and step, but Liu Bei tried his best to persuade Cao Cao to kill Lu Bu.
In the end, Lu Bu was hanged in front of the White Gate Tower.
Lu Bu had enough face to relieve Xiaopei's siege, and the most important thing was his strength: the courage of ten thousand people, plus tens of thousands of elites. When he was reduced to a prisoner, the so-called face was worthless, and even the grace of saving his life was useless.
In the same way, if Mr. Ying Ruocheng hid himself during meals after becoming famous, the result would definitely be different.
Only with strength can there be face.
And the strength has always had to be won by yourself, ** is it given by others?