On Tuesday afternoon, Zhang Xin (not his real name) received another text message from his mother.
He was working and didn't want to reply, and he found that his mother didn't dare to call him, only texted, which was even more interesting.
The screen lit up every ten minutes, and Zhang Xin felt funny.
After getting off work, he picked up his mobile phone and saw the last text message from his mother and asked, "Son, which room will I live in for the elderly in the future?"”
Without the slightest hesitation, he replied to his mother:"Mom, you can't pick the rooms in the nursing home, they are all according to the price, we bought them at a medium level, and the room facilities are the same. ”
The mother was silent.
Zhang Xin returned home and mentioned it to his wife, but his wife Wang Xuehan (pseudonym) smiled and didn't say anything.
The couple knew about this matter, and there was no need to discuss itBecause of what happened back then, it made everyone unhappy to mention it at this time, so they simply didn't mention it.
But Zhang Xin's mother refused to give up, and sent a message in the evening: "Son, my mother doesn't want to go to a nursing home." ”
Zhang Xin was a little impatient and replied, "What qualifications do you have to make requests with me?"It's better to pack up and move to a nursing home, at least someone to take care of, or don't bother me. ”
The mother was completely silent this time.
In fact, Zhang Xin's attitude, in the eyes of ordinary people, will think that he is outrageous and unfilial.
But Zhang Xin did this entirely because his mother did not fulfill her obligations at all.
He has known his mother as a fun-loving person for as long as he can remember, and when he was a student, he often went out to play and went to nearby attractions with colleagues and friends on weekends, spending a lot of money every time.
A few years ago, Zhang Xin got married, his wife gave birth to a child, and his mother was obviously retired, but she refused to help. Wang Xuehan is pregnant, confinement, and when the child needs to be taken alongThe mother-in-law never showed up from beginning to end.
Why did she go?Of course it's a tour!
Zhang Xin grew up from childhood to adulthood, and then got married and had a baby, his mother was always at ease, not accompanying her son much, and the money was not in place if people didn't come. Asked why she was so cold and selfish, she said that she was not obliged to give so much to her son.
Zhang Xin repeatedly asked his mother to come to the house to help take care of the baby, and her mother kept saying: "You are an adult, I don't need to continue to help you, don't bother me!."”
So, Wang Xuehan's mother helped her daughter bring a 6-year-old baby.
Zhang Xin made up his mind at that time that he must honor his mother-in-law well.
The couple has worked hard for 6 years, and some time ago they just changed to a big house, which has not yet been renovated, and they are ready to live with their parents-in-law as a family of three, but Zhang Xin's mother frequently sent messages asking her where her room was arranged.
Zhang Xin didn't need to discuss with his wife at all, so he rejected his mother indifferentlyHe knew that he couldn't ignore his conscience and couldn't be ashamed of his mother-in-law.
Besides, he himself didn't get his mother's love, and he was still on fire, how could he let his mother move in?
Zhang Xin thought that his mother would retreat in the face of difficulties if he was so resolute, and his mother had been so cold to herself and his wife for so many years, she should have known it in her own heart, and in the end, it was a big deal to quarrel, and she really didn't want to go to a nursing home, so she gave 1,000 living expenses every month, and this matter would be over.
But his mother didn't know anything about it, so she came to the door and had a big fight with Zhang Xin's wife and mother-in-law.
At that time, the couple was at work, the children were in school, and there was only a mother-in-law at home.
After Zhang Xin moved to a new house with his family, he completely cut off contact with his mother.
He didn't want to give his mother a penny, and he wanted his mother to lose face, so he waited for his mother to sue him.
It's a big deal, let relatives and friends know what your mother has done over the years, and then, according to the law, give her a corresponding amount of maintenance money every month, which can be regarded as a return for her "nurturing grace".
As a mother, it is definitely a very outrageous practice to push her son to the end of the road.
In a normal family, when children need help from their parents, parents always give support without hesitation, even the most cautious parents will help their children as much as possible after verifying the situation.
Parents who treat their children as cash cows to extract benefits, and think that they can reap benefits by raising their children.
The imbalance between responsibility and reward leads to the destruction of the parent-child relationship
The improvement of cognition has made some people's ideas more extreme, even a little extreme.
Like the mother of the male protagonist in this story, she is complacent about her opinions and thinks she is sensible.
She thinks that as a mother, she has raised her children, and the grace of raising them for more than 20 years can already make the children grateful for a lifetime. She feels that according to the law, parents can stop helping their children after they turn 18.
As a result, whether it was financial support or operational help, she did not do it.
This is the lack of awareness of responsibilityBut she thought she had seen through the truth and found a blind spot.
The mother didn't understand at all that what she paid was only to assume the "basic responsibility", and correspondingly, she could only get the "basic feedback" given by the child.
Parents only raise their children until they are 18 years old and give a small amount of care, so correspondingly, the children only need to bear the basic pension expenses of their parents, and do not need to be too filial.
But is Zhang Xin's mother willing to accept life in a nursing home?
Apparently, she wanted more.
What she wants is a lively and warm life like other old people, and she wants to live with her son, daughter-in-law, and grandchildren, hoping that they will take care of herself and receive their meticulous care when she is sick.
But in all fairness, is she worthy?
When her daughter-in-law gave birth to her most exhausting moment, she went out to play in the mountains and rivers;She was sick in bed in her sixties, but she wanted her daughter-in-law to bring her tea and water.
As a man, you can't be too greedy, let alone greedy for what you don't deserve.
Zhang Xin's mother doesn't understand what real responsibility is, and she doesn't even understand the logic of exchanging hearts for hearts, and she blindly wants to be cheap.
But her son and daughter-in-law are not fools, the era of foolishness and filial piety has passed, and parents like Zhang Xin's mother should wake up!
They can't get the old age they want, don't blame their children for being unfilialIf you want to blame yourself, why you are not willing to pay for your children in the first place, why you distort the family relationship like this with your own hands.
The relationship between family members is far from being as easy to repair as they imagined!
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