Speak to the heart
In order for a child to be approved by his parents, he can only do what his parents teach. If you are disobedient, I don't want you anymore, and for me to want you, you must be obedient. What can a child do?He was too young to run away from home. As a result, he can only lose himself, he can only compare. Even if you walk down the street now, you will see a child who will say to his parents: Look how obedient I am, I don't eat ice cream, and the disobedient child should have a stomachache.
1. Comparison is a phenomenon of the whole human race, and if there is comparison, there will be criticism
Seeing how ignorant that child is, he has to cry to buy toys, but in fact he wants to buy them, but he doesn't dare to say it, so he can only express it around a corner. She means I'm obedient, can you buy it for me. If parents always say that my child is smart, then the child will not dare to show his stupidity. If parents always say that the child is mature, he will not dare to express his childishness. If parents always say that the child is strong, the child will not dare to express his weakness.
We are all taught to compare, from childhood to adulthood. Someone learns Xi well, a certain child is filial, next door buys a big house, a more exclusive car, a colleague has more money, someone has a more charismatic personality. Compare, others are better than me, I will be jealous, if you don't compare, the jealousy will disappear, and you will be able to allow others to be others and be yourself. How can a child do it without comparison?If you are happy with yourself, your parents will say that you are an unmotivated child. Why don't you compare yourself to that good kid?Why do you have to compare yourself to those bad boys?Compared with those who are not good at learning XiWhy is it so easy to satisfy?
So today's scarcity is the result of the early teachings, otherwise there is no one who is not satisfied, and there is no one who is in need. Comparison is a very stupid attitude, because each person is unique, all are incomparable, once you have this understanding, the jealousy disappears, each person is unique, you can only be yourself, everyone has different genes. A child never says to his parents why aren't you the richest man?Others can become the first in the country, why can't you?
Second, if there is a comparison, there will be a disguise, and if there is falsehood, the truth will be lost, and it will fall into pain.
Everybody is jealous of others, and because of jealousy, we create suffering, we create hell, and because of jealousy, we become very humble. One of the things we often hear is that if you hate you, you don't, and if you have something better than me, or do better than me, I will resent it. If you are not as good as mine, I will dislike it if you are worse than me. If a friend fails, she's suffering, it's painful, you feel good. If your friend is successful, happy, and happy, you will feel very uncomfortable and miserable.
Deep down, you may know that you don't have any special value. You see someone who looks happy and smiling, but how do you know for sure what their true emotions are?Perhaps their hearts are also in joy. You know that your smile may be disguised because instead of true joy in your heart, it may be filled with sadness. Only you know your heart, this is your unique world, and no one else can reach it.
In this competitive and stressful society, people tend to look good and try to show their best side. However, these outward manifestations are often just to cater to the expectations of society, not the true self. Because of the existence of jealousy, we often feel bitter because of it, and even become mean and hypocritical. In order to satisfy our desires, we begin to disguise qualities that we do not have, or to exhibit unnatural emotions.
3. Give up comparison, and jealousy will disappear, meanness will disappear, and hypocrisy will disappear
Over time, we gradually lose our true selves and become more and more mechanical, starting to imitate and compete with others. What else can we do?In this seemingly bustling world, we gradually lose ourselves and forget the true needs of our hearts. Faced with this situation, do we need to re-examine our values and life pursuits? Shouldn't we learn to cherish what we really feel inside?No longer be swayed by outside judgments. By knowing ourselves, we can find our true happiness and fulfillment.
Give up comparison, jealousy will disappear, meanness will disappear, hypocrisy will disappear, and only when you begin to cultivate your inner abundance and become an increasingly authentic individual, loving the real you, no matter how bad, is the real you. No matter how good it is, it's all a fake you, a desperate disguised you, a cowardly one, a person without dignity. Only by respecting yourself can you respect life. Otherwise, I am inferior to others, and I will not live. We're always comparing, I can't win, I don't go out, I don't see anyone.
What kind of world would it be if there were only wins and losses, only competition, and only comparisons in your world. Even if you have a close friend, you will think that he will compete with you, that he will compare with you, because the outside world is a reaction of the inner world. I have to win, I have to be good, it's a road of no return to the dark. If you don't compare, live your own life, and only color your own life, then the gates of heaven will open for you immediately, they are always open, but you don't pay attention to it, you just look at hell.
Teacher Sanqing is a national second-level psychological counselor, an international hypnotist, a contracted author, the teacher is good at looking at problems from different angles, analyzing problems and solving problems, in the teacher's heart, no one is abnormal, no one is sick, the heart changes and the world changes. If you like the teacher's article, you can follow me.