1 was beaten by a twenty-year-old in the game hall that year, and he was too young to be beaten at the time.
When I got out of the arcade, I saw the guy's motorcycle. I decided to go home and take off the big lock of my father's motorcycle and lock the guy's car, and it didn't take long for me to laugh when I saw the guy with a saw.
When I got home, I cried, my father's motorcycle was stolen, and the community surveillance looked at the lock I opened, and my father beat me violently.
2 I ate a lot of meat during the Chinese New Year and was a little constipated, and I told my mother to find some laxative medicine to eat, and my mother immediately handed me a jujube. I put the jujube in my mouth, or my mother knows more, I don't know that jujube can still be laxative. Mom said that it was not, the jujube had just fallen to the ground, and it would definitely make you diarrhea after eating.
3. A beautiful woman participated in a dating activity and filled in her personal information as required.
After returning to the dormitory, the beauty complained: "Oops, I wrote the occupation and zodiac sign backwards!" ”
The friend comforted him: "What's the big deal, most people can understand it." ”
The beauty said with a slight cry: "The key is that I belong to the chicken!"
4 The first time I went to his house with my boyfriend, I just saw his mother, I hurriedly said hello: "Hello Auntie" His mother took my hand and said kindly: "What is it called, Auntie, call Mom." I shyly called out, "Mom." His mother said happily: "Hey, I will recognize you as a daughter, and I will have the opportunity to introduce you to a better partner in the future." ”
5The teacher found that Xiao Ming always talked in class, and said to him angrily: "Xiao Ming, if you are not honest again, I will tell your father." Unexpectedly, Xiao Ming said very calmly: "Teacher, in fact, I am not satisfied with you, but I have never told your father." "It directly made the teacher angry.
6 buddy Xiao Zhang owes me money, and I haven't paid it back for a year, and every time he says that he is waiting for me at home, and the door is always locked in the past. On this day, Xiao Zhang called me **, saying that I had plenty of money, let me go and get the money, I was skeptical: Brother, think about the words you said when you borrowed money, don't let me pigeon this time! My son, who was playing on the sidelines, heard me and grabbed me: Daddy, where are your pigeons? Don't know if pigeon meat is good or not? I looked at my son, and this guy was drooling.
7. My niece usually likes to watch emotional TV dramas with me. One day I caught a cold and kept coughing while watching TV, and my niece suddenly put a handkerchief in front of me. I was puzzled and asked her: What is this for? The bear child said: Auntie, it's been a long time to cough, it's time to **!
8Yesterday my son told us a shocking secret, and at dinner yesterday, my son told us that he had a girlfriend, and the girl liked him very much, and he liked the girl too, and said that he would give him another 5,000 ...... after marriageThis bride price is indeed not expensive, but son, it's only the second grade of primary school, why are you in a hurry?
9 It's snowing, we went out to eat hot pot with friends, along the way your buddy warmed his girlfriend's hands, I turned my head and glanced at my husband affectionately, but the two goods called up directly with a handful of snow, and laughed: "My daughter-in-law washed her face like this when she was training in the cold!" Can you still have this product?
10Two young children were playing together. The boy asked the girl, "When you grow up, will you marry me?" ”
No" why? ”
I can't marry you because people in our family only marry relatives. You know, my grandpa and grandma, dad and mom, uncle and aunt were like that, even my brother had to marry my sister-in-law. You say, 'How can I marry you?' ”
11 You boy cow, it's only been a few days, and you have changed your wife again.
I went to my husband's unit, the first time I went to his colleague with long hair, he praised his good looks, and after a short time, he cut his short hair, and went to find his husband again, and I saw him and his colleague pointing at me from a distance, and when I came to the front, his colleague smiled a little abnormally, so I asked my husband what he just said to his colleague, and my husband said that his colleague said: You kid Niu, it's only been a few days, and I changed my wife ......
I ......Fortunately, my husband said that it was just my wife who changed her hairstyle.