In a love relationship, duplicity is like a ** knife, quietly piercing the distance between the hearts of both parties. We often encounter such a situation: the words and actions expressed by the other person seem to match, but there are different thoughts and emotions hidden in the heart, and they pretend to be free and easy when they care. How to reject such hypocritical expressions in love and establish authentic communication and relationships? In this article, let's explore together, eliminate duplicity in love, pursue sincere relationships, and don't miss the right person because of screwing.
1.1. Insecurity
In love, most duplicity is divided into two types: 1. Obviously need each other, but show that he is good alone. 2. I obviously like each other, but I don't care. I do this because I don't want the other person to think that "he is important" and "you need him". For insecure people, letting the other party grab their handle is undoubtedly handing over the end of the blade to the other party with their own hands.
1.2. Fear of being in a vulnerable position
On the complex chessboard of intimacy, no one wants to be the emotionally weak pawn. In their eyes, emotions seem to be a game, and the game is always accompanied by winning and losing, strength and weakness. In order to avoid being the one who is eliminated from the competition, they skillfully hide their weaknesses and skillfully develop their own emotional strategies.
1.3. Fear of being disliked
In infancy and early childhood, when we are not able to cope with the world on our own, whether our needs are paid attention to and responded to by adults in a timely manner affects our attachment patterns in the future. If the needs of infancy and toddler years are ignored or criticized, grow up. In a relationship, you will fear whether your needs will be accepted and answered.
1.4. The tangle of both wants and wants
This occurs most often in "fearful attachment people", who crave stable intimacy, but are overwhelmed when they are in an intimate relationship and desperately want to escape. I don't know how to respond to the love and enthusiasm shown by the other party.,When the other person's behavior causes you to feel uneasy, you instantly become indifferent and alienated.。 Even if you try to lighten the mood, the other person may just say "it's okay" and respond with indifference, not wanting to say how they really feel.
2.1. Unclear attitude
Duplicity people often do not express their thoughts and feelings directly, but in a suggestive or indirect way. For example, I want to be with you, but I keep saying "I don't care, I don't care", which makes you scratch your head. With this unclear attitude, it is easy for the other party to feel confused and helpless.
2.2. Deliberately create obstacles
Duplicity in love sometimes deliberately creates obstacles to test you. For example, being late or no-show for an appointment can make you wait. This deliberate act of creating obstacles often overwhelms the other partner, who can easily feel tired and disappointed, and even doubt the sincerity and reliability of the partner.
2.3. Frequent lying
Duplicity people tend to lie easily. In order to protect themselves or cover up the truth, they often choose to lie in silence, and they often lie not to hurt others, but to protect themselves. This kind of lying will make the other half feel incomprehensible and unacceptable, and it will also destroy the trust and affection between the two parties.
3.1 Self-honesty
Acknowledging your feelings and becoming aware of your true emotions and thoughts is a crucial first step. Don't hide or distort your feelings, be brave enough to face the truth in your heart. Learn to communicate with the other person with sincerity and don't choose to hide or lie because of fear or avoidance.
3.2. Respect the feelings of others
In communication, we should listen attentively to each other's voices and understand them deeply. The other person's feelings should not be treated as trivial matters, let alone dismissed. We should respect the will of the other person and not try to manipulate or impose our own will on others. Understanding and respecting each other is an important cornerstone of a good relationship.
3.3 Build trust
Remember, walking the talk is the cornerstone of building trust. Your every word and sentence should be in line with your actions, otherwise, you will lose the trust of others. In order to maintain that trust, it is important to be honest. Let the other person feel your sincerity and sincerity, and establish an atmosphere of honesty and honesty.
4.1. Communicate openly and honestly
Create a safe communication environment where lovers can feel respected and honest, like flowers blooming in the soft light of the morning light, freely showing their true inner world. Be honest with your lover about your awareness of those insincere actions and how they affect your relationship like the fog of the night. Use sincere language to dispel doubts and misunderstandings in the hearts of lovers.
4.2. Look for the roots
* Reasons behind attempting to understand duplicity, which may be due to fear, insecurity, or other emotional issues. By understanding the cause, the problem can be handled better. Solve problems together, work with lovers on how to solve the troubles caused by duplicity, and find solutions together.
4.3. Set boundaries
Be clear about your expectations, tell your partner what you want to be honest and truthful, make it clear that you don't want duplicity in the relationship, and set boundaries and rules together. Stick to your principles, and when your lover shows duplicity again, stick to your principles and don't passively accept or acquiesce to such behavior.
4.4. Improve communication skills
Listening and understanding are the cornerstones of our communication with our lovers. We must not only listen to the simple words, but also go deep behind them to feel the hidden emotions and needs. In the ocean of communication, accusations and criticisms are like sharp reefs, which are easy to break the boat of love. Learn to express your opinions and feelings in gentle language, and let love flow in understanding and tolerance.
In love, duplicity can have a negative impact on the relationship and even destroy an otherwise beautiful relationship. Rejecting duplicity is not only a respect for a lover, but also a responsibility for oneself and the relationship. By communicating honestly and authentically, and building mutual trust and understanding, we can work together to create a healthier, stronger loving relationship. Let us perceive and interpret with action on the road of love, let sincerity and frankness become the background color of our love, and write a beautiful story that belongs to us together.