Hello, my name is Zhu Dabao!
Stay away from miserable sellers, because it's too unlucky! In particular, implicit NPD narcissists not only like to sell miserably, but also like to be miserable, and are keen to create their own miserable personas to attract sympathetic human beings as blood bags, and then suck the other party's spirit and even wealth dry.
Today, let's discuss the underlying logic of selling miserably, to help you improve your skills and avoid these unlucky ghosts.
First of all, "to sell" is a verb, here the emphasis is on the word "sell", "sell" refers to exchange, the person who sells miserable wants to exchange this unfortunate thing for other people's time, energy and money.
No one wants something so obscure as "miserable" that makes them purely suffer, unless "miserable" is a prop that can be exchanged for something worth the best value of others, then this person will keep the label of "miserable", rather than keeping the essence of miserable, and then keep using this label. BecauseHis purpose is not to make himself miserable, but to use it to ask for something worthwhile.
Therefore, the miserable person who sells the miserable can be exaggerated or fictional. Even if it's real, you can exchange it for selling miserably and get something more valuable, but in fact, you don't have to be miserable, and your bad luck changes hands.
Let me give you a common example, I like to complain about the unfairness of fate to my children, and I married a resentful old mother with a bad husband, this kind of resentful old mother generally maintains a marriage relationship with her bad husband for decades, but she is reluctant to divorce for a long time, but likes to put the responsibility on the child, saying that it is all for the good of the child, in order not to lose the face of the child, in order to give the child a complete home, she endures humiliation and maintains a bad marital relationship.
The child is also very helpless, because who the old mother marries and whether to divorce or not is indeed not within the jurisdiction of her own rights, and she has no right to speak, and she does not enjoy rights, but she is forced to bear responsibility for no reason, which is really being played by hooligans. Even if the child occasionally puts forward some opinions, saying "If you don't love you anymore, or you will leave", you will be scolded by the old mother and labeled as an unfilial son.
Let's break it downWhat kind of value exchange is hidden behind this resentful woman-style selling behavior。Not to mention whether the bad husband in her mouth is really as bad as she describes, and whether her unhappy marital status has the element of her death, even if her husband is really bad, she chooses not to leave, there are many mysteries.
As a creature with survival instinct, there is no reason to choose to stay in a place where she loses a lot of blood for a long time, because this will not live long, and she will either leave or have a way to regain blood in order to continue her life for many years.
Then some people will say that people with depression will also have a state of dementia and will not leave. But depression is often the result of an inward self-attack, rather than an attack on others to hunt for blood. Many people with depression even endure the pain and laugh to please them, and still choose to burn themselves and illuminate others during their illness. Depression is severe to a certain extent, and choosing to cut oneself off is also an extreme way to leave.
Of course, we can't advocate this extreme way, and depression is a long-term compression of brain nerves, brain chemistry imbalance, and hope that people with symptoms will go to the hospital in time to receive **.
And selling miserable is for the purpose of sucking blood, which is often a manifestation of low mental health, and people with implicit narcissistic personality disorder especially like to sell miserable. The way of returning blood to the old mother is often to suck the blood of her relatives and friends, especially her own children, to make up for the blood she lost in the so-called bad marriage, she will sell miserably to relatives, friends and children, accompanied by hidden or obvious asking actions, so that relatives, friends and children give her special care, give her time, energy and money, she will be bitter and bitter and bitter to say how miserable she is, she needs her children to share the housework, saying that she has worked hard to raise her children, and requires her children to read at night or work hard outside. Then the success will come back to repay her nurturing grace, that is, to use the child's youthful sweat to create wealth to support her.
If you look closely, you are likely to find that these miserable old mothers are often very lazy and idle, if her husband wants to work outside to make money to support the family, and the children have to go to school, then she has a lot of personal time in addition to completing some housework, but she chooses to play mahjong and gossip and watch TV, but she does not choose to engage in side hustles, learn to study, improve skills, devote herself to her career, and even do housework is not very attentive, often dumping her hands to her children and family. So she got your special care for her by selling miserably, she got your time, energy and money, and she could exchange it for something of ** value through a mouth, and the cost performance of this exchange was very high for her, to put it bluntly, she could get it for nothing.
So why did she tear off the label of tragic character? This is obviously a prop for her to make a profit, and you exchange your time, energy and money as a stupid child or a stupid family, in exchange for full of negative energy, she was humiliated and accused by her openly and secretly, got a sense of guilt and inferiority, took on the responsibility and burden that fell on your head for no reason, did a task that did not belong to you, and carried the unfortunate fate that she herself was too lazy to carry.
As an adult, as a person in the modern society of New China, no one really restricts her personal freedom, she is not without a way out, she can choose to divorce, bring her own children, be self-reliant, and create living conditions for herself and her children.
I believe that friends in the comment area can cite many examples of ordinary or extraordinary strong women around them, but this road is indeed difficult to walk, full of hardships and sweat, but it is an upward way to live. And those who rely on self-pity and self-pity, you will find that these people often do not lack the physique and ability to be self-reliant and self-reliant, but lack the independent personality and subjective initiative of adults, and their mental level stays in the "waiting, relying on, and asking" stage in infancy, waiting for others to comfort and feed, relying on others to live, and reaching out when they need something, rather than acting on their own.
It is very normal for babies to have the behavior of "waiting, leaning, and asking", because babies are real weakling, they have not completed development, they have difficulty doing basic actions such as turning over and crawling, they do not have independent survival ability, and need to be taken care of by adults. But as an adult, you obviously have hands and feet, you have freedom of movement, you can stand and run, but you have to lie down and kneel, and then reach out for food, this is the choice. They have chosen a low-level survival mode, a survival mode that is easier than self-reliance, pays less for themselves, and can also claim resources through a mouth.
If you put forward an opinion to make her change, for example, she is unhappy in her marriage, you persuade her to divorce, she loves to pretend to be sick, and you take her to the hospital, but she is anxious with you, and in turn blames you, because she is unwilling to *** miserable label, a bloodsucking prop that she relies on to survive.
Speaking of which, I have to mention,People who like to sell miserably often hide an extremely narcissistic mentality。The narcissistic person feels that he is the most perfect in the world, that he deserves all the best and best things in the world, and that he still wants to be offered to him, and that he should not do anything with his hands, just like the gods who are worshiped in the temple.
At the same time, he is the most innocent. Many people don't understand what is the most innocent, that is, they don't deserve to suffer any hardship. It's not so much that these people are selling miserably, it's better to say that they're complaining about why others aren't kneeling and giving them good things. And you will find that some narcissists, especially implicit narcissists, like to be miserable. When someone mentions their misfortunes, the narcissist will proclaim that they are going to be worse, as if he is going to compete with someone for the main role of the United States.
Note that he is not using his past experiences to empathize with you, because the narcissist does not comfort other unfortunate people, and he even wants to deny the unfortunate experiences of others, so that everyone can focus on his tragic story and let everyone focus their energy to comfort him. The narcissist is trying to defend his position as the worst, that is, the most innocent, in the world.
The most innocent meaning is that there will be no hardships and sufferings. If he suffers, it must be someone else's fault, the fault of this world, he is always perfect, there is nothing wrong, and he should not be responsible. He wants to emphasize that he is not to blame and that other unfortunate people are not as innocent as he is.
Because they are not innocent, others are not perfect, others deserve their suffering, so others deserve their misfortunes. In fact, in the final analysis, it is extremely unempathetic, extremely self-centered, full of malicious attitude towards others, and behavior is also asking and plundering.
In addition, I want to talk about another dirty underlying logic of selling miserably, that is, he is obviously the perpetrator, but he wants to confuse the public through acting and selling misery, and get rid of responsibility and punishment.
Let's take a look at Lao Rongzhi's case, even if the evidence is conclusive, she is a frenzied serial murderer, she will still sell miserably in court with a clip sound, saying that she was only 21 years old at the time, too young, but she herself had a hard time. This kind of empty and ridiculous miserable rhetoric is still observing the judge with sinister eyebrows to see if anyone has been fooled by her acting skills.
Therefore, when you encounter a very miserable person, especially when it comes to responsibility and punishment-related incidents, you must be more sober and collect evidence from multiple parties. Selling miserable is a common trick used by criminals and NPD narcissists to dump the pot
I'm not saying here that complaining and complaining must be worse than miserable, but we have to distinguish between normal emotional outpouring and miserable behavior. People with a relatively healthy mind and personality will have negative emotions that need to be dealt with when something bad happens, and they may complain to relatives and friends.
But after the emotional processing, after the emotional mourning period is over, they will take action, solve the problem, get themselves out of the unfavorable situation, will read, study, review, summarize, do self-improvement, learn from failure, become a better self, and are not willing to hold on to the identity of the victim, and will not cling to the label that they are innocent.
Because people with a relatively healthy mind and personality will admit that they are not perfect, such as admitting that their previous cognition was too low, that they could not control their emotions before, that they were easily impulsive, that they were easy to destroy interpersonal relationships, etc., and then self-reflection and self-innovation. Instead of emphasizing that he is too kind and pure all day long, he uses this hypocritical and useless way to boast to himself and the people around him.
Narcissistic people sell miserably endlessly, stubble after stubble,, bad luck like a plague god, and ghosts often act as demons.
If you have such a person around you, you should clean up your circle of friends.
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