Recently, a hot news has attracted widespread attention: a 70-year-old grandmother bravely embarked on the road to divorce. From the detailed accounts shared by netizens, we know that behind this belated relief is full of twists and turns.
According to the poster, this resilient old man has endured hardships on the road to freedom of marriage. In order to be able to go through the divorce process smoothly, she had to turn to her eldest son-in-law to obtain the key document of the household register.
However, her decision was not understood and supported by her family. When she stepped into the door of her eldest son-in-law's house, she was greeted not by sympathy and respect, but by a scolding that she was denounced as "crazy".
Faced with such a predicament, the old man was depressed and wandered alone in the community garden, and the pain in his heart was indescribable. After the owner found out, he gave his grandmother calm and rational comfort in time, and encouraged her to pour out her pain and true thoughts that had been hidden in her heart for many years.
In the sincere conversation, the grandmother revealed the torment she had endured for many years, and even revealed that she had the idea of suicide many times, but out of selfless maternal love for her two daughters, she chose to live strongly.
These heartfelt words touched the heartstrings of the second son-in-law, and after some silent thinking, he resolutely stood on his grandmother's side and decided to support her choice. So, the second son-in-law, the owner and the grandmother went to the eldest son-in-law's house together, and finally succeeded in obtaining the vital household registration book.
The next day, although my grandfather showed obvious resistance, he seemed to be at a loss in the face of law and morality, so I had to accompany my grandmother into the Civil Affairs Bureau. They made an appointment for a cooling-off period for divorce and officially started the legal process of moving towards a new life.
In the latest updated post, a grandmother holding a divorce certificate is particularly eye-catching. ** In her, her face is filled with long-lost happiness and relief, this hard-won freedom, as if it is the brightest smile in her later life, indicating that she has finally broken free from the shackles and realized the return of self-worth and dignity.
When the poster revealed that after successfully obtaining the relevant certificate, the grandmother quickly shared this landmark ** with all the family members, which sparked heated discussions.
The popularity of the post soared, and the comment area was full of blessings and emotion.
In this story about the divorce of a 70-year-old grandmother, we get a glimpse of the endless depth of women's selfless dedication. According to the poster, grandpa is suspected of cheating, but grandma has always been as tenacious as a man to bear the burden of life.
Faced with the pain and unhappiness in the marriage, and even fell into despair for a while, the grandmother did not choose to end the marriage early, but stuck to the children's side and did her best to create a normal growth environment for them.
It wasn't until the daughters got married and didn't need her to worry too much that Grandma decided to live bravely for herself.
It can be said that grandma's life is a true portrayal of the lives of many women in China: in a long married life, although she is tormented in her heart, she is willing to sacrifice herself and suffer silently for the happiness of her children.
Let us recall that 56-year-old aunt Su Min began to travel alone by car, in her decades-long married life, she was like a meticulous nanny, taking care of the trivial life of the whole family, but she endured her husband's domestic violence and verbal insults for a long time, and was finally diagnosed with severe depression.
Even so, she never mentioned the word divorce, and when she was young, she felt that life after divorce was unsustainable, so she could only choose to endure.
This notion is not uncommon in Chinese society, and the deep concern for children and the fear of uncertainty about the future have led many Chinese women to prefer to maintain the status quo rather than take the step of divorce.
It wasn't until she was 56 years old that Aunt Su Min finally mustered up the courage and chose to escape from the shackles of marriage. She drove an RV on a road trip that lasted more than two years, and after returning home, she resolutely decided to go down the road to divorce.
Recently, the "original match Yongjie Xiaosan"** originated from a real incident in Shijiazhuang, Hebei Province.
When a resilient woman discovers that her husband and a third party are sitting in her car, she resolutely stands up and exposes the betrayal.
In tears, the woman complained about the hardships of life: she shouldered the burden of her family, and she had to work hard in the workplace and set up a stall in the night market to support the whole family.
The car that her husband drove was bought by her frugality; The two children were also raised by her single-handedly, and she poured countless efforts and maternal love.
However, her efforts were not rewarded with due respect, and her husband enjoyed the peace of mind that her hard work had brought about and enjoyed the success of the family, and never provided any financial support for the family's expenses.
When the wife finally lifted this veil of hypocrisy, when she tried to open the car door for questioning, her husband ruthlessly dragged her dozens of meters away, if it was not for the timely intervention of passers-by to stop her, the consequences would be unimaginable, and even her life might be endangered.
Many viewers can't help but have a question in their hearts after **related**: Since she can live so wonderfully independently, why do she have to endure the bullying of scumbags again and again?
Perhaps the answer lies deep in the concern for their children, or the fear of social pressure, which makes them hesitate in front of the threshold of divorce and delay in taking that decisive step.
In one of his in-depth articles, counseling expert Kewen introduced an insightful concept – "divorce shame". This concept is like an invisible barrier that restricts many women's steps towards freedom.
Many women who are trapped in unhappy marriages are trapped in endless struggles, entanglements and pains under the influence of this force, and are unable to break free from the shackles of marriage.
Take 55-year-old netizen @雨中仙子 as an example, when she was young, in order to maintain her family and take care of her young children, she had to grit her teeth and persist in difficult days, and she had no time to take care of the idea of divorce. Despite the torment of her husband's alcoholism and domestic violence, she believes that this is the norm because everyone around her seems to be going through similar difficulties.
However, when the netizen entered retirement and joined the community square dance team, her perception was influenced by a divorced teammate who was four or five years younger than her.
This sister lives a comfortable and happy life after the divorce, often traveling with a group of sisters, leaving their laughter all over the world.
She once sighed that in the past, she was limited by time and energy, but now that the child has grown up, she has more time for herself, if she is not brave enough to pursue true love at this time, I am afraid that she will always miss the opportunity.
Inspired by the lifestyle of this divorced teammate, netizens also began to yearn for the return of single life.
However, whenever the idea of divorce swells in her heart, she can't help but admonish herself: "At this age, what kind of romantic love does it seem a little out of place, or even a little embarrassing?" ”
Among the many reasons that prevent women from bravely ending a relationship, "for the sake of children", "worrying about parental disappointment" and "fear of other people's comments" are the most common.
However, among these reasons, we do not see any of them being for the well-being and happiness of women themselves.
Many Chinese women have become accustomed to silently enduring all kinds of injustices and grievances in marriage, and struggle to maintain this broken relationship.
There is no more difficult challenge in life than to be brave enough to let go of the elements of life that no longer fit.
Previously, I read an affectionate post from a female netizen who chose to divorce at the age of 28, a decision that caused widespread confusion and criticism among her relatives and friends, who thought that she seemed to ignore the beauty of life.
The contributor recalled that when she was 28 years old, despite her ex-husband's outstanding appearance and casual personality, the two fell in love at first sight and spent seven years of long-distance love together, from falling in love in college until entering the palace of marriage.
In the eyes of everyone, they seem to be a match made in heaven, and they did have times when they loved each other deeply and were inseparable.
However, the two years of married life revealed the unknown side of her ex-husband. When the electrical circuit, water pipe blockage and even the refrigerator were damaged, he dealt with it hastily with the sentence "find a property to solve it", completely ignoring his wife's feelings;
When she encountered a setback in her work and burst into tears, he passed by indifferently and poured water to quench her thirst; Occasionally, he would do some housework, but if his wife was not able to work side by side, he would put on a gloomy face for a long time;
Once, she woke up from a nightmare and called him for comfort, only to get him to turn his head and say coldly: "I have more hours to go to work, don't disturb my sleep ......."”
These seemingly trivial and ordinary little things accumulate over time, like a drizzle of raindrops, gradually eroding her belief and expectations for love.
Finally, on her 28th birthday, when she found out that her ex-husband had forgotten this day that meant so much to her, and recalled the well-planned surprise when she celebrated his birthday, the grievances in her heart came like a tide.
At that moment, she deeply realized that the fiery love between them had completely cooled and disappeared.
Finally, one day, the author started a conversation with her ex-husband in an unprecedented calm: "I don't covet the garage, I just want to end this marriage." ”
Faced with such an unexpected proposal, the ex-husband was instantly shocked, and his first reaction turned out to be to question whether she was having an affair. After a day of intense arguments and communication, the two finally reached an agreement that afternoon and decided to divorce.
Since then, the author has been single for three years. When she first returned to her parents' home, her father angrily accused her, believing that his daughter's actions had brought shame on the whole family. However, the author, who was determined to live a good life for himself, successfully refuted his father's accusations with a firm attitude, leaving him speechless.
Time flies, and three years later, the author met love again, and her boyfriend launched a persistent pursuit of her for more than a month, and he didn't mind her divorce experience. The charm of her boyfriend's personality gradually melted the ice in the author's heart like a warm sun, making her regain her sense of happiness.
She said frankly that if she hadn't taken that step bravely, she would never have been so happy now. As a deeply rooted saying goes: marriage is to pursue happiness, and divorce is also a way to happiness.
Divorce is not the bleak beginning of life, but the end of misfortune and the starting line of a new life. As shown by the highly regarded concept in the Intensive Reading Jun General Knowledge Dictionary, the number of thumbs up is as high as 10 times.
In fact, neither marriage nor love should be regarded as a woman's final destination. A person's primary responsibility is to live a wonderful and fulfilling life.
This is reminiscent of the American scholar Macmillan, who has experienced three divorces, and shared eloquently in a TED talk: "If I don't learn to love myself, I will never be able to experience a full life." If I choose to get married, then the first thing I want to marry is myself. ”
Instead of being trapped in the marital quagmire that consumes each other and blocking your life path step by step, it is better to let go of meaningless persistence, withdraw in time, and seek relief. In the world of feelings, there is no more beautiful gesture than to settle one's mind before caring for others.
Once we find our self-consistent self, we will find that the right people and the right things are on the way to come.
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