The end of the year is approaching, and the question of which side to return to celebrate the New Year has become a hot topic for many people.
Especially in the case of long-term work abroad, the vacation is usually only a few days, and if both parents are far away from home, it is obvious that time is not enough to take care of both.
On this topic, some scholars have given this advice: when the woman returns to her parents' home alone, the man takes the child for the Spring Festival.
There are three main reasons for this.
First of all, women also need the company of their families.
In many cases, women live their lives around the family.
We are accustomed to women's giving, but we often ignore their desire for family affection and their deep longing for their parents.
Encouraging women to go home and spend time with their parents during the Chinese New Year can also provide emotional support for their inner longing.
Secondly, the man showed his paternal love during the Chinese New Year.
The man was too busy with his daily routine to find time to play with his children.
If you don't work during the Chinese New Year, you can't say that you don't have time, you should spend time with your children, experience the hard work of your wife taking care of your children every day, and learn to understand and empathize with your wife's feelings.
Some men especially like to participate in parties during the Chinese New Year, either to drink or to play cards. With the child by his side, he can't be overly indulgent and can control his behavior a little.
The third point is to let the child enjoy a few days of freedom and unfettered life.
Children are often restrained by their mothers, who have good intentions, but can also make children feel uncomfortable at times.
It is also a good option to have children live with their fathers, which can give them more freedom to do things they dare not do on a daily basis, spend more time playing outdoors and enjoy a free-range lifestyle.
After listening to the experts, the debate in the comment section became extremely intense.
Some netizens asked: "If the child does not walk with the woman, will it be better to follow the father?" In addition, if a woman returns to her parents' home alone, it will not be long before there will be rumors that she is divorced and that it is better for her to return with her husband and children. ”
Some netizens commented: "Now that my mother has returned to her parents' home, won't my sister-in-law return to her parents' house?" Grandma also returned to her parents' house, and now she can cook for herself with a surname. ”
Some netizens expressed this opinion: "In our hometown, married daughters can't go back to their parents' homes for the Spring Festival. Even if I go back to my parents' house, my brother and sister-in-law will not have a good impression of me, and I don't want to go back to my in-laws' house. If we can't come to a consensus, why insist on going home and not having a good time in my own little family? ”
We can say all sorts of things, but only when we stand on our own feet will we realize that the opinion of experts does not really help us much.
In daily life, not all parents expect their daughters to return to their parents' homes for the Spring Festival.
One blogger shared her experience by saying she felt hurt when she returned to her parents' home for the Chinese New Year.
The blogger ended her marriage and took her 4-year-old daughter to run an online ride-hailing business in Shenzhen, and although her income was acceptable, she missed her hometown very much.
Every Spring Festival, she would take her daughter back to her parents' home, thinking that this would be a joyful New Year's celebration and let her daughter experience the joy of family reunion.
Unexpectedly, the mother pulls her aside and tells her that her daughter should not spend the Chinese New Year's Eve in her maiden home, and that it doesn't matter, if your brother is not doing well, it may put the blame on you.
Observing that the attitude of her brother and sister-in-law was neither salty nor light, the woman finally understood the truth. On the thirtieth day of the Chinese New Year's Eve, she drove out with her daughter, originally planning to find a hotel to stay, but unexpectedly received an order, so she decided to take her daughter to the sports car, and made a lot of money as a result.
She said that she overestimated her parents' love for her, thinking that her daughter had no home after marriage because she was too persistent, but in fact, as long as she was with her daughter, it was home in **.
It's true that families are always full of joy, but if you think too much, you may not feel happy together.
The reason why I mention this issue is actually to hope that everyone can understand and understand women's emotions.
Women have a deep nostalgia for returning to their parents' homes, but they don't have too many obsessions.
In fact, many people understand that the most important thing after getting married is to return to your in-laws' house, because you are a member of your in-laws' family, and when you return to your parents' house, you are a guest.
However, this is not something that men can understand. As men, we should understand our wife's feelings more during the New Year, rather than leaving all the housework to her, and take the initiative to take responsibility for taking care of the children. I believe that even when I go back to my in-laws' house for the New Year, women will feel very happy.
There is a view that there may be many conflicts and contradictions after marriage.
In fact, the deep-seated cause of the contradiction lies in our position.
It is an indisputable fact that women feel homesick, and if their husbands show understanding and understanding, women will feel that they have found a suitable partner and will be willing to go with them wherever they can.
On the other hand, if a husband and wife have a dispute, even if the wife returns to her maiden home, she will still feel uncomfortable inside.
The true value of marriage lies in mutual understanding and consideration, not simply fighting for oneself. We only need to listen to the advice of experts, and we also need to make the right choice for our family according to the actual situation.
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