The ancients said: "The most treacherous is also the human heart." ”No matter how many pixels your eyes have, you can't see through people's hearts. People who are good to you are not necessarily really good, and people who are bad to you are not necessarily really bad.
During the Warring States Period, there was a military strategist named Wu Qi, although he was extremely smart, but the ending of his life was not very good, he played with villains many times, there were successes and failures.
Linking the experience of the ancients with the reality of today's life, it is not difficult to find that when you encounter a villain's bullying, don't turn your face immediately, but learn the following ways to fight back, pursue advantages and avoid disadvantages.
First, learn to "escape" and distance yourself so that the other person can't hurt you.
Lü's Spring and Autumn Period records that when Wu Qi was in Wei, he had many confrontations with the Qin army, and they all won victories, occupied a large amount of land, and established Hexi County.
In order to win the battle, he endured hardships with his soldiers, sleeping on the ridges at night, using leaves as quilts to avoid cold dew.
Wu Qi has been in Hexi County for a long time, and his troops are strong, which caused the dissatisfaction of the minister Wang Cuo. Wang Cuo was worried that sooner or later, his position would not be guaranteed and he would be replaced by Wu Qi.
In front of Wei Wuhou, Wang said bad things about Wu Qi many times. Wu Qi became the object of suspicion, so he left Wei and went to Chu.
There is a saying: "One mountain cannot tolerate two tigers." ”
When you are slandered and excluded by the villain, it is not that you have done anything wrong, but that you have done a lot of things right, and you have slowly decapitated your head, attracted the attention of the villain, or shook the interests of the villain.
The philosopher Hall said, "Profit is all the driving force of human action." ”If you are a gentleman, you should know how to give profits to villains. Therefore, to stay away from the villain, let him be out of reach, and from then on the well water does not interfere with the river water, which is to actively and effectively fight back.
A villain can rule a city or a piece of land, but he cannot rule the whole world. If you go to a place that the villain can't control, he won't see you as a thorn in his side.
Just like Wu Qi, it is a wise move to leave Wang Cuo.
Second, learn to "self-cross", your strength is the best revenge.
After Wu became the state of Chu, he was promoted to Ling Yin, and he has always sought progress and advocated changing the law. For example, the customs were unified, the laws were made public, and the nobility was abolished after three generations.
Historical Records:"Baiyue in the south, Chen Cai in the north, but three Jin, and Qin in the west. ”It reflects the merits of Wu Qi and the strength of the Chu State.
At the same time, the Xihe Prefecture of Wei was taken away by the Qin State. King Wei was remorseful.
"The Ferryman" wrote: "If life is a lonely river, who will be the ferryman of your soul?" ”Neither in the past nor in the present, there is no one who crosses your soul. If anything, it's yourself.
Many people are terrified when they meet villains. As everyone knows, villains just want you to become confused and weak step by step. You have to do the opposite – make yourself strong and impress.
For example, Wang Yangming, a thinker in the Ming Dynasty, made a lot of contributions, but was slandered by the villains Zhang Zhong and Jiang Bin in the officialdom and relegated to Longchang, Guizhou, and his life was very hard. He did not care, but concentrated on reading, and put forward the theory that "the more difficult it is, the more time to cultivate the mind", laying the foundation of "the unity of knowledge and action".
Being a man should be "indomitable", and the villain bullying you is the best time to witness your tenacity. Don't miss it.
Third, learn to "use strength" to let more powerful people crush the villain who bullies you.
Dealing with villains, if you keep dodging and don't have an effective confrontation, then the villain will have nothing to fear.
Therefore, it is not impossible to choose the right opportunity to let the villain suffer a little loss, and know how powerful he is.
When Wu Qi was in Chu, Wei united with Qi and Wei to attack Zhao. The state of Chu decisively sent troops to rescue Zhao. Wu Qi, as the main general, was ashamed of the snow, beat the Wei State to the ground, and forced it to the edge of the Yellow River.
The Zhao army also took advantage of the situation to counterattack and occupy Wei's Thorn Pu and other places.
Although no one directly pointed out that Wu Qi was concerned about the "villain" of Wei, he told the people around him with his actions that he was a person he could not be provoked.
With the help of the strength of Chu and Zhao, he achieved his prestige. This move is obviously a lever of strength.
There is a passage in "The Power of Others": "Interconnected people can make full use of each other's strength, take advantage of the situation, and realize their maximum potential even in the most desperate circumstances." ”No one can live as an island. When you are bullied, it means that you are ostracized and isolated. It is difficult for you to fight back against the villain, but as long as you take the opportunity to store energy, over time, you can reverse the opponent.
For example, in the workplace, you work in obscurity, and when you become a boss, you should clean up those villains who are secretly doing bad things, and don't be overly tolerant.
Interpersonal communication also has a process of eliminating the advantages of the other. If you don't grow, you will perish. The way to prove your growth is to show your abilities appropriately.
Fourth, enlarge the "pattern" of life, stop when you should stop, and let go of others is to let go of yourself.
Wu Qi's fame is great, but his ambition is also great, and he does not take into account the retreat in life.
After the death of King Chu Mourning, he lost his biggest backer, and the princes and ministers who had been deprived of the rights of the nobility showed their hatred for him immediately. His life has also begun to decline, and there is no perfect ending.
Later generations sighed: "Greedy for fame laughed at Wu Qi, and said that the country sighed at Su Qin." ”In economics, there is an effect called the "crocodile effect". In other words, if the crocodile bites your foot, you have to use your hand to relieve it, and the crocodile will bite your hand again. The best way is to "make a decision on the spot" and give up your feet. That is, the wisdom of "abandoning the car to protect the handsome".
The villain, many times, is as difficult as a crocodile. And his ability is not to be underestimated.
Wu Qi was in Wei and met the villain, but he could get out of the way; But he met the villain in the Chu State, but he did not get rid of it. Because he overestimated his own abilities too much, and did not make correct judgments, he did not see problems enough, and he did not have enough foresight.
There is a term called "retirement". That is, things are pretty much the same, forget it, don't continue.
As ordinary people, it should be thought that we will all retire, and it is impossible to keep dealing with villains. When you retire, you will really land safely, and the villains in the world will have nothing to do with you.
Professor Yu Shiwei said: "Character determines fate, and temperament affects the pattern." ”When you meet a villain, you have to have a long-term plan and change your words and deeds. On the premise of protecting yourself, grow yourself and counter your opponents.
Confronting the villain, turning the other cheek is a direct contradiction and is not advisable. You have to learn to fight wits and courage and win with wisdom and mentality.
Good is rewarded with good, and evil is rewarded with evil. In everything, you must watch the after-effects, don't be impulsive.
The villain is strong, sweet first and then bitter; Good people are weak, first bitter and then sweet.
May you and I, good people be rewarded, and all evil will not be done.