Laugh pulls classic hilarious jokes, specializing in all kinds of unhappiness!

Mondo Entertainment Updated on 2024-03-06

The funny joke is coming:

Hello everyone, Welcome to the collection of 100% funny jokes to make you (high) laugh for a day!

no.1、

The family was watching a ball game in the living room, and the child's aunt farted in the house, making a loud noise, and then stiffened her mouth, saying that it was like this after cutting the hemorrhoids, and she wouldn't let out a dumb fart, it was all loud....

Then the child's father answered: "What's the matter, it seems that the doctor has good skills, and he cut a whistle for you......."“

Immediately, everyone laughed!

no.2、

After the holiday to play games at home, my mother came in to clean up the room, and saw that it was too messy, so she said while cleaning up: "This house makes you so messy, like a pigsty......“

Without looking up, I said, "What do you know?".This is called the ...... of heroes out of chaos“

Mom laughed and said, "Hero?".If you've been in the house all winter, you're a hibernating bear!“

Oops, my mother, I'm laughing to death!」

no.3、

Bao Zheng wanted to name his daughter and asked Gongsun Ce for help: "My mother named me Bao Zheng because she wanted me to save the world. Later, the world called me Bao Qingtian, which also contained bright and beautiful wishes. Hopefully, my child's name will reflect a similar determination to benefit society. What do you call it?”

Gongsun Strategy groaned and said, "Free shipping." ”

no.4、

A buddy came to the recruiter and excitedly asked, "How much salary can you give me after I come to work in your company?"”

The recruiter replied, "We are giving you 1,500 yuan a month now and 2,600 yuan a month after three months." ”

He said happily, "Great, then I'll be on time in three months!".”

no.5、

Standing in line for breakfast, someone slapped me from behind. I looked back and saw that it was two girls, and one of them smiled shyly and said

I'm sorry, I recognized the wrong person. ”

I looked back, and then I vaguely heard one of the girls say, "What a handsome, so ugly, what a look ...... eyes."”

no.6、

There is a woman who is bold, and she has a very good relationship with her husband. Once a friend talked about Xiao San at dinner, someone asked her: "If your husband has an affair, will you divorce him?"”

She squinted at his husband and said lightly: "I have not been divorced in my life, only widowed!."”

no.7、

A couple quarreled on the street, and the girl slapped her boyfriend hard.

In order to save face, the man shouted to the girl: "If you have the ability, you can slap me again!".”

The girlfriend did not hesitate to slap him again.

The man paused and said, "Since you are so obedient, I will spare you." ”

no.8、

My wife and I quarreled again over a trivial matter, and she couldn't listen to what I said, yelling at me: "You shit!".”

I felt my wife go up, but I couldn't let it go. So I had an idea and said, "No wonder we are both presidents."

Quarrel, you keep making such unreasonable and harsh demands!”

no.9、

My wife said, "Do you know why there are more divorces in Western countries than in China?"”

The husband said: "This is not simple, because Cupid, the Western goddess of love, is a little doll, while the old man under the moon in China is of course much more experienced!."”

no.10、

My wife said to me:"If one day, we really quarrel, can you hold back your anger and hug me, we are lovers, not enemies.

I was so angry that I said:"Hug?At that time, you were harder to press than a pig for the New Year!”

---end--- This article is a plain text funny joke, only for entertainment, if there is bad guidance, please understand!

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