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Hilarious and exciting, I am "little him", welcome to watch "Joke Collection".
no.1、
Before going to bed at night, my wife sprinkled some toilet water on herself and her 3-year-old son.
I said, "Sprinkle some on me too." ”
Son: "All three of them are sprinkled, who are the mosquitoes biting!" ”
Hey, you kid! Before I finished speaking, my wife gave me a pillow, "Our son is right. ”
no.2、
One day, Snow White escaped from the castle and came to the forest, and saw a small cabin, and when she went in, she saw seven small beds and went to sleep, and when she woke up, she saw seven dwarfs standing in front of her and asked, Are you the seven dwarfs in my fate, and then the dwarf said, "You have gone wrong, we are gourd babies."
no.3、
One day, the two sisters were sleeping. My sister said to my sister, "Sister, there are a lot of mosquitoes today."
Sister said:Turn off the lights and the mosquitoes won't be able to see us
Later, my sister really turned off the light, and suddenly there was a pairFirefliesflew in, and my sister said nervouslySister is miserable, mosquitoes come to us with lanterns
no.4、
My son was pinched by another child in kindergarten today, and when asked if he was in pain, he said it hurt a lot, and asked him why he didn't fight back, and he said that he couldn't outrun the person who pinched him......I looked at him and sighed: "You are hurt every day like this, I feel distressed!" “
He blinked his eyes and said seriously, "Mom, it's okay, it hurts for a while."It was a girl who pinched me, and the boy should have let the girl, so I didn't fight back!
no.5、
Tell your daughter the story of "The Wolf Comes".
I conclude by asking: What does this story tell us?
Daughter:Mom, the lamb must be delicious!
no.6、
Hearing the conversation between my 5-year-old little niece and my 5-year-old son, I couldn't hold it anymore!
Little niece: "I got a certificate last month. ”
Son: "I got two last month. ”
Little niece: "I have two boyfriends".
The son sneered: ".I've talked about more than a dozen girlfriends so far!
no.7、
On a whim, I wanted to test whether my daughter could sort out the relationship between family members, so I asked her:
Who is Mom and Dad? "— Grandma".
What about Mommy's Mommy? "—Grandma".
So who are you grandma? "—Auntie and Grandma".
Who are you grandma? "—Little Ancestor".
I think it's necessary to talk to two old people.
no.8、
One starry night, mom and son playing in the yard.
The mother said to her son, "Baby, how many stars are there in the sky?" ”
The son looked up and counted carefully, and after a while, he said, "Mom,It was too dark to count. Wait until dawn to count.
no.9、
Dad was driving away mosquitoes in the room, and the son said, "Daddy, get the mosquitoes out and bite Mommy." ”
The mother said, "The son who has no conscience wants mosquitoes to bite his mother." ”
The son said, ".Mom, you want to donate blood, don't mosquitoes just help you?
no.10、
A little boy went to the obstetrics and gynecology clinic with his pregnant mother, and the mother covered her stomach and moaned from time to time, and the little boy asked in horror: "Mom, what's wrong with you?" ”
The mother explained, "Your brother kicked me, he is getting more and more naughty." ”
The boy said, "Why don't you swallow a toy and give it to your brother to play with?" ”
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