List of high-quality authors Sa Beining's secret experience**, I understand what is the greatest unfilial piety 5,000 years of Chinese civilization history accumulation, among which the virtue of filial piety seems to be the endless warm current in our national blood.
From ancient times to the present, the story of filial piety passed down by word of mouth and practiced by people is like a bright star lighting up the land of China, which is a value that we have inherited from generation to generation and is deeply rooted in our hearts, urging every descendant of Yan and Huang not to forget the respect and love for their elders.
But recently, the well-known host Sa Beining shared a reflection in a public occasion that caused widespread heated discussions, and he put forward a point of view: taking your parents to live by your side is not necessarily the same as filial piety.
The story goes like this, at that time, Sa Beining and his sister were both in Beijing, and they each achieved certain career achievements.
In order to let the old father and mother, who have worked hard for most of their lives, enjoy the care and companionship of their children, they are full of filial piety to take the second elder from Wuhan to the prosperous capital Beijing.
It was originally envisioned as a warm family reunion, but the reality did not turn out as expected.
Due to the pressure and busyness of the siblings, they often go out early and return late, and even the time to have a good meal with their parents has become a luxury.
Although the two elderly people have left their familiar hometown in Wuhan, it is still difficult to see the children in Beijing.
In this city, which is completely unfamiliar to the elderly, they don't even dare to go out for a walk easily, for fear that they will get lost in this huge labyrinth and can only spend most of their time at home.
In order to spend their old age with their children, they gave up their familiar living environment, many years of social circles, and the rhythm of life that they had long been accustomed to.
In exchange, it is not the expected family happiness, but endless loneliness and confusion.
This made Sa Beining deeply reflect, it turns out that sometimes, taking his parents to his side may not be so much to make them happy, but to add invisible troubles and pain to them.
As a result, Sa Beining realized that true filial piety is not only a simple physical proximity, but more importantly, understanding and respecting the needs and living habits of parents, and ensuring that they are spiritually satisfied and comforted.
Bringing your parents to your side will not make up for the emptiness that comes from being away from their familiar surroundings if you don't really care about their inner world.
Then this so-called "filial piety" may be more of a kind of self-satisfaction out of our own emotional sustenance, rather than a manifestation of actions that really think about our parents.
When I first heard Sa Beining say this, many people were afraid that their hearts would be tense and they wanted to refute a few words immediately.
However, when everyone calms down and listens to Sa Beining's personal experience and chews on the truth in it, they will find that these words do have a profound connotation.
I think back then, when we were children, we were often bored with our parents' meticulous care and all-encompassing behavior.
Even though we know that there is love behind those disciplines and arrangements, we are still resistant to their approach because of our desire for independence.
As the years passed, we grew up** and began to take on the responsibilities of the family, wanting to give back to our parents in our own way.
No matter how hard we try to provide them with the best living conditions, sometimes what we get is not the heartfelt joy of our parents, but their incomprehension and confusion about our "good intentions".
In our opinion, the facilities and convenience of life in the city are far better than those in the countryside, but in the hearts of our parents, the familiar streets and alleys of their hometown, the cordial neighborhood relationship and the deep local complex may be their deepest yearning.
Even if the city is full of flowers, if there is no sense of belonging, no matter how tall the building is, it will not be able to fill the gap in the soul.
On the contrary, even if the environment of their hometown is simple, it carries their memories and roots.
Between family affection, the most important thing is not the formality, but the tacit understanding of mutual achievement and mutual respect.
If your parents like the pace and convenience of city life, go all out to create conditions where they can enjoy the joy of family life around you.
If parents love every plant and tree in their hometown, why should we force them to leave their comfort zone?
After all, for parents in old age, material enjoyment is less important than spiritual pleasure and physical and mental peace.
At the end of the day, the core of the issue is not whether parents are there for them, but understanding and respecting their choices so that they can enjoy their old age in the environment where they feel most comfortable and comfortable.
On the premise of ensuring adequate medical care, a good quality of life and adequate physical health, as children, we should learn to conform to our parents' wishes rather than try to change them.
The conceptual gap between the two generations exists objectively and cannot be easily crossed, and only through understanding and tolerance can we truly realize the beautiful vision of harmonious coexistence between family members.