After my friend Xiaojie gave birth to her second child, she was often asked if she was stressed or regretted. Some people are also worried about what will happen if her first child is a son, and her second child is still a son. There are also people who envy her for having both children and daughters, and her future life will be happier.
Nowadays, second-child families often become the focus of heated discussions, and Xiaojie's friends believe that although second-child families need to pay more, they will also get double the return. First of all, raising a second child requires a lot of time and effort, but at the same time, it will be doubly emotionally rewarding. When Xiaojie's eldest son was three years old, she began to think about having a second child. Although her friends advised her not to give birth, worried about financial pressure and future fatigue, she decided to have a second child.
Despite the increased financial pressure, Xiaojie still chose to give birth to a second child, a lovely daughter, to complete the family. Taking care of her children was deeply exhausting and she spent almost all her time with them, but she felt that it was not enough. By the time the daughter is born, the older child is already in middle school and is cared for and picked up by grandparents. Despite their busyness, the children are healthy and happy.
In a second-child family, Xiaojie not only has to deal with a busy schedule and exhaustion, but also pays attention to the growth of her eldest son. Because her youngest daughter needs to be with her at all times, her love and time for her eldest son gradually decreases. At a Children's Day event, the eldest son longs for his parents to attend his performance, but Xiaojie is unable to attend because he needs to take care of his younger sister. The son went home and cried about his grievances, which made Xiaojie heartbroken and helpless.
When we talk about the challenges of raising a child, we usually think of the effort and time required. However, this task becomes more complicated when it comes to two or more children. In addition to doubling down on effort and care, parents must balance each child's emotional needs to ensure that each child feels equally cared for and loved. If parents do not treat their children fairly, this can affect the relationship between siblings.
Therefore, we must admit that those parents with two children are under tremendous pressure. They must think through all possible challenges before they start so as not to collapse under pressure. But for parents who truly love their children, are willing to endure hardships and enjoy the joy of accompanying them as they grow up, this effort can also pay off greatly.
Secondly, the financial burden is undoubtedly an insurmountable mountain for families with two children, and although money is not everything, the importance of money cannot be ignored when raising a second child. In today's society, the cost of raising a child is quite high, from milk powder, diapers, clothing to medical expenses, etc.
Taking milk powder as an example, a child needs about one bucket per week, and each bucket** is about 200 yuan, which means that the monthly expenditure in this area is close to 1,000 yuan. In addition, the cost of diapers should not be underestimated, which also requires nearly 300 yuan per month. Therefore, in these two aspects alone, a child's monthly expenses can easily exceed 1,000 yuan.
If children go to kindergarten, it is difficult to enter public schools, and the annual cost of private schools is as high as thousands or even more than 10,000 yuan; And after going to school, various interests and tutorial classes are also a lot of expenses. As children grow up, college education, marriage, and buying a house and car are even more of a heavy financial burden. Therefore, the cost of raising children is indeed high for the average family.
For parents with better financial conditions and stable jobs, having a second child may not be a problem. However, for those families with average financial conditions and low incomes, it is necessary to seriously consider whether to have a second child, as this may reduce the quality of life of the family and have an impact on future life.
My cousin accidentally became pregnant again when her eldest son was one and a half years old, and was faced with the choice of whether to keep the child. Although her elders advised her to give up, she was hesitant because of her reluctance and affection for her second child. Eventually, she decided to keep the child, and luckily, the second child was indeed a girl and fulfilled her wishes. Although the two children brought financial and caregiving pressure to the family, with the help of both parents, the cousin managed to get through the most difficult period.
When asked if she regretted giving birth to her second child, the cousin admitted that she did regret it when her youngest daughter was just one year old. At that time, she was exhausted by the burden of caring for her children. However, over time, she gradually adapted to such a life and realized that she did not expect much from her two children. She only hopes that they can grow up healthy and happy, and that their families will be happy in the future.
Regarding the question of whether to have a second child, my cousin believes that the key lies in personal choice. If you don't want to be under too much pressure, then a child's life may be more suitable for you. However, if you genuinely love children and have the ability to cope with various challenges, then having two children is also a good option. In any case, it's important to think carefully before making a decision and make sure you've thought through all possible issues.