Hello everyone, I'm "he said", and welcome to the "Joke Collection".
When I first entered the school, the class introduced myself. A male classmate stepped onto the podium: "My name is Wang, I am from a certain city, I like to play chess!" After saying that, he went down, and the next one was a girl, who shyly walked up to the podium and introduced herself nervously: ".I....My name is Xia Qi...
Teacher: "Students, if you think you're stupid, please stand up." ”
The classmates looked at each other, but they didn't dare to stand up, only one stood up bravely, and the teacher: "This classmate, do you think you're stupid?" ”
Student: ".No, teacher, I just don't want you to stand alone!
When I was hungry, I saw a bottle of yogurt on my colleague's table, and I drank it without thinking about it. After a while, a colleague came and shouted, "Mine."Facial cleanserHow is it gone! 108 pieces! ”
Brother didn't speak, just walked to the toilet silentlyDesperately spitting。When I finally threw up, when I returned to my seat, my colleague hugged a bottle and said, "I'm scared to death, the facial cleanser just rolled under the table, but why is my yogurt gone." ”
Ni Mei!
In the third year of high school, the language was not good, and it was basically a countdown, and it was rare to get one in an exam89 pointsAt this time, the Chinese teacher began to take class: "Everyone did well in the test this timeThe whole class has a score of 90 or less
What a painful realization!
There is a big mirror on the wall of the bedroom, and there is a bag on the buttocks of Lao Zhang in the bedroom, and after taking a shower, he turns his back to the mirror and opens it with his hand** to see what kind of bag is on the bottom buttocks, and he was bumped into by his roommate Xiao Zhang, and Xiao Zhang said: ".Wow, there is such a Yaxing, I don't sleep alone at night to enjoy chrysanthemums here! ”
In the afternoon, between classes, a petite beauty in the class was wiping the blackboard. Because he is not tall, there is a large area that cannot be wiped on tiptoe. The way she worked hard made me protective! Without saying a word, I walked up and said to her kindly, "Let me help you." She was very touched and said, "Thank you." ”
Then I put my arms around her waist and lifted her up.
A male classmate, one day in class, the pen ran out of water, asked a girl not far away to borrow a pen, only to hear the girl shout".Silly comparisons?
This man suddenly felt aggrieved, rub, I was scolded by you and a woman because of this trivial matter? His anger was mixed with grievances, and he shouted: ".Won't I just borrow a pen on my day, why are you scolding me?
The girl said weakly, "I, I didn't scold you..."I ask you to useWhat a pen
8. Examinations. The cheating in the final exam was discovered by the invigilator, and the teacher did not take away my test papers after the exam, I thought to myself what to do, I went to the toilet in a hurry, and when I came back, I found that the teacher was already handing out the test papers, I had an idea, and handed the paper to the teacher: "Teacher, the invigilator of the last exam missed a copy, and I don't know whose it is?" ”
The teacher said, "Okay, I'll take it back later."
Not surprisingly, I took the first place in this course.
Basketball court fun facts.
The school rules prohibit playing basketball in the morning, but I have a clever plan.
Unexpectedly, once I couldn't help but go to the court to play basketball, but I didn't expect the education department to find out, the teacher asked us to stand in a row, criticized the education, and we also wrote down the class and name one by one, and when I was asked, I told the teacher that I was Li Ran, a sophomore (7) class, hehe, in fact, I was a sophomore (4) Zhang Dong.
Unexpectedly, a teacher came up to me and said, "Come with me to the office."
After I went, I found that it was on the steel plateIt turned out that this teacher happened to be the head teacher of Class 7.
In a cooking lesson, the teacher asks the students, "Please answer."What makes a chef?
The students all replied, "Someone who is a great culinary".
"It's not enough," the teacher said. ”
The students looked at the teacher curiously, and the teacher said, "You must also have the skill of giving your food a nice name, such as bean sprouts and cabbage soup, you can't call it three fresh soup, but call it a golden hook and a jade plate."
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