Hello everyone, I'm "he said", and welcome to the "Joke Collection".
My husband took me on a motorcycle, and I grabbed his clothes. As he walked, he looked down at my hand and said, "Put it in my pocket." ”
I said suddenly, "Yo, you still know that you feel sorry for me, afraid that I'm cold?"”
The heartless husband replied, "I have a cigarette in my pocket, and I'm afraid of it." “
I had just finished arguing with my wife and was about to go to work, when I went out, I found that my bag and keys were locked in the house. I know that at this time, it is even more difficult to get my wife to open the door than to ascend to the sky.
So, he had an idea and shouted, "Look at me locking the door, so you can't get out!."”
You dare!!The door slammed open, and my wife rushed out violently.
My wife and I quarreled again over a trivial matter, and she couldn't listen to what I said, yelling at me: "You shit!".”
I felt my wife go up, but I couldn't let it go. So I had an idea and said, "No wonder we are both presidents."
Quarrel, you keep making such unreasonable and harsh demands!”
I was so moved that I was about to cry!Excitedly replied: "You can."
Do you want to stop eating me?"I look forward and happily await the next sweet sentence, less than ten seconds.
I received a reply: "It's too oily to eat." ”
His wife always chattered before going to bed, which made him very unhappy. One night, after chattering for a while, the wife asked her husband, "Are the doors and windows of the house closed?"”
The husband replied: "My dear, except for your chatterbox, everything that should be closed is closed." ”
My wife said to me"If one day, we really quarrel, can you hold back your anger and hug me, we are lovers, not enemies. “
I was so angry that I said:"Hug??At that time, you were harder to press than a pig for the New Year!"[tears] [tears].
Husband: "Believe it or not, I killed 10 flies, 4 males and 6 females."
Wife: "I don't believe it, how do you know your mother-in-law?".”
Husband: "It couldn't be simpler, the male is killed on the drinking utensils, and the female is killed on the mirror." “
Wife: "Husband, I think your lucky color is purple." “
Husband: "Why?".
Wife: "Because every time I beat you, it turns purple, so I won't fight...
Just now I told my wife that I had bought her a house in Beijing, and she grabbed my hand and said, "Oh my God!".Is this true?Husband, I'm so excited. ”
To be honest, I'm also very excited, after all, this is the first time I've cheated on my wife. Hehe.
It's been 5 days since I got married to my wife, and now it's more than 10 o'clock in the evening, and my wife hasn't come home yet, so I asked: Hey, wife, are you working overtime?
The wife hesitated for a moment, and then said, "I forgot to marry you, I'll go back to my parents' house." ”
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