Watching a play with my mother-in-law.
In this TV series, a young couple who are about to get married discuss whether they want to live with their mother-in-law after marriage.
The daughter-in-law means that she doesn't want to live with her mother-in-law, and the mother-in-law means that she wants to live with her son and daughter-in-law, and the husband is in a dilemma and doesn't know what to do.
There are differences between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, two people are uncomfortable, and men who love each other together are like the insoles dilemma in the middle, which is the norm in married life.
But now, as people's cognitive level is getting higher and higher, a new type of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship has quietly become popular, which can make the relationship between three people reach a balanced state.
First, do a good job of separating disciplines and not interfere in life.
The rent for the studio was due at the end of the month, and I didn't know how to adjust it.
Next year's plan needs to change a room, and there is no suitable one near my home, so I want to rent a room in the community directly.
To be honest, I really didn't want to pay this money, such a entanglement has been in my heart for a long time, but I didn't expect that at that moment, my mother-in-law took the initiative to talk to me about this matter and gave me advice to solve the big problem that had been bothering me for months.
I asked her why she hadn't told me about it earlier.
What my mother-in-law meant was that she didn't know what kind of measurements and plans I had in mind, and it was inconvenient for her to interfere too much, but seeing that I didn't act, she couldn't help but say it to see if I adopted it.
But in the end, I still have to make the decision, and whether I choose to accept it or reject it, she respects it.
The reason why we were able to live together for five years without quarreling was mainly because we did not interfere too much in each other's lives and reduced the generation of conflicts.
The reason why there is a conflict between people is that one person wants the other person to listen to him, and the other person does not want the other half to control too much.
If you find the root of the problem, you will find the answer to the problem, do a good job of categorization, do what you should do, and reduce interference in other people's affairs, and your feelings will not be affected.
Second, put yourself in someone else's shoes and don't be self-centered.
The girlfriend complained about her mother-in-law more than once, thinking that the other party's concept of life was too weird.
Girlfriends advocate a healthy eating lifestyle, and every time they eat, as long as there are leftovers, they choose to throw them away.
But my best friend's mother-in-law ate leftovers for days on end, so much so that they often quarreled over these things.
In fact, no one is wrong, the reason for the disagreement is that the two people have different growth backgrounds, as well as different experiences in the first half of their lives, so that two fundamentally different aspects of people intersect together and have a mutual understanding.
If you can put yourself in the other person's shoes and speculate about the other person's life, all problems will be solved.
A large part of the conflict between people comes from the hope that others will obey you 100%.
Habituation becomes the center of a family, and habituation allows everyone to listen to their own opinions and see themselves as important.
In fact, this is a fundamental paradox because the most important person in everyone's life is themselves.
Therefore, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along, to put it bluntly, it is a confrontation between two forces.
If you want to maintain harmony in the relationship between your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, you can't blindly stand on your own side and desire everything that the other party is 100% suitable for.
It's more about putting yourself in the other person's position to understand the principles and reasons behind the differences between two people.
There is no relationship in the world that cannot be solved, even if the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a difficult problem, there are also people who manage such a relationship very well.