Netizen @Mengqian left a message saying: I am a person with a strong sense of inferiority, but no one has ever believed it.
I remember when I first went to school in Jinan, I was not familiar with life. Many people choose to carefully adapt to their new environment, but I do the opposite.
Participate in the class committee election, participate in the orientation party, participate in the debate competition, and show off again and again.
My classmates were a little envious of me: "Where do you get your confidence, you dare to do anything." ”
I say, it's not self-confidence, it's inferiority.
Gu Long wrote in "Heroes Without Tears":"If a person's heart is full of inferiority, he will often become the proudest person. ”
Only by constantly working hard and constantly gaining the approval of others can people with low self-esteem cover up their inner cowardice and fear.
In the past, because of his short stature, he was always alone. There are no partners to play with, and no friends to go home with. The attitude towards any challenge is "don't dare, won't, can't be".
Afraid of being laughed at and looking down on me, I always resist dealing with others. But the less I contact people, the lower I become, and the stronger my inferiority complex becomes.
I've also asked myself, is this really good?
Gradually, I let go of myself and tried to be good. Study hard every day to get good results and be praised by others; I learned guitar in my spare time, just for the envious eyes of my classmates when I was at the party.
In everyone's eyes, I became more confident, and there seemed to be a glimmer of light on my body. But only I know that there is still a humble self behind the light.
Because of low self-esteem, I want to express myself, to be recognized by others, to get the attention of others.
On the evening of the 19th, Yi Yang Qianxi, who had just attended the opening ceremony of the Golden Rooster and Hundred Flowers Film Festival, was interviewed.
After hearing some praise, Yi Yang Qianxi said: "I have always had an inferiority complex, and it will be easier to be satisfied when I get praise." ”
When putting self-confidence and low self-esteem in front of him, he will not hesitate to choose inferiority. He said:"Because low self-esteem makes me want to improve. ”
Inferiority and Transcendence" mentions: "Inferiority complex is the original determining force of behavior, and inferiority complex itself is not **, it is a normal development process of a person in pursuit of superiority." ”
Zhang Ziyi, who is now dazzling, is also a child with low self-esteem.
When she was a child, she learned to dance, but because she wasn't that material, she has been living in inferiority.
At the age of 17, he was admitted to the ** Drama Academy, but was almost persuaded to quit because his performance was not up to par.
My Father and Mother" was a big hit, but countless doubts and rumors made her unable to raise her head.
Ang Lee's "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" gave her hope of proving herself. But she has been afraid in her heart, afraid that her name will not be right, afraid that someone will replace her, so she tried her best to cover up her cowardice.
Hanging Weiya is a day, when he hits the wall, he always hits hard, the whole nail is cut off, and after putting it in the snow to stop the bleeding, he continues to act.
Half of Zhang Ziyi's fame comes from her perseverance, while the other half comes from her inner fear and inferiority.
It is that feeling that makes her always in a state of desperate struggle, even if she pays the biggest price, she has to fight for the final victory.
The more inferior you are, the more you have to get ahead; moreLow self-esteem, the more we must strive for progress.
Psychologist Alfred Adler argues:"Everyone is born with an inferiority complex, and the inferiority complex makes the individual need to strive for excellence, and in order to meet the needs of the individual, it is necessary to seek to overcome their own defects by means of compensation. ”
He divides this compensatory psychology into negative compensation and positive compensation.
People who choose negative compensation will become timid and afraid of things in their low self-esteem, not close to the crowd, sensitive and suspicious in their inner world, and even begin to be negative and misanthropic.
The stronger the inferiority complex, the greater the desire to prove oneself to the outside world, and the more motivated to achieve one's career.
Zeng Guofan, a famous minister in the late Qing Dynasty, also has an inferiority complex in his bones, in the words of Li Hongzhang, "Confucianism".
Zeng Guofan knew that he would not fight, because he understood that he was a Confucian scholar and was not good at giving advice. Helpless to bear a heavy responsibility, I can only take one step at a time, not to rush forward, not to grab credit.
By fighting "stupid battles" and "stupid battles", he made the Hunan army step by step, and finally wiped out the entire Taiping army, thus establishing immortal miraculous feats.
His experience allows us to see another possibility of an inferiority complex life:
They are good at looking into their own hearts and understand the gap between themselves and others, so they are willing to spend more time and energy to achieve themselves. This down-to-earth attitude has become their biggest advantage.
When I was a child, I watched Jin Yong's martial arts, and I always felt that the heroes were all for the country and the people, and they were heroic.
When I grew up, I realized that all those who are strong have an inferiority complex.
Guo Jing was inferior because of stupidity, and Yang Guo was not upbeat because of a broken arm; Wei Xiaobao refused to talk more about his life experience, and Di Yun was named a wicked person. But they didn't limit themselves because of their inferiority.
Low self-esteem is never an enemy, it can be the best friend of growing up.
Maleonn said in the "Confessions": "All my conceit comes from my inferiority, and all my heroism comes from my weakness." The words in his mouth are full of doubt, and the affection is because he hates himself for being ruthless. ”
In fact, countless people who work hard for their dreams, on the surface, look positive and sunny, but in private they still feel lonely and inferior.
But they don't admit defeat, and their inferiority complex has been spurring them forward, getting closer and closer to their ideal goal.
Everyone has more or less low self-esteem, maybe because they see others better than themselves, or maybe they don't meet their expectations. But so what?
It is precisely because of low self-esteem that we have to work hard, to change, to run desperately, to surpass one after another who has laughed at us.
Low self-esteem is the best gift that fate has given us.
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