When I grew up, I found that those good practitioners ended up being synonymous with weakness. In this society, being too modest will only make people feel that you are being bullied. It's only when we become nasty that we get the respect we deserve. People who are easy to be bullied, others think they are easy to be bullied, especially when they are bullied by bad people, they will be bullied all the time, which is really bad.
What kind of people are easily bullied?
In life, there is a bottom line for everyone or what everyone does, and never overdo it. If this line is exceeded, then the consequences are very serious, just like in life, when a car crosses the street, it cannot cross the red line and cannot run a red light. And some people don't know the danger of the bottom line, often go their own way, and in the end it's too late to regret it.
As the saying goes, there are no rules, and there are insurmountable bottom lines in life and work. If you cross this line, it means that you will lose your family, friendships, and love. In life, those who have no bottom line are often easily bullied by others and framed by others. Therefore, as a person, everyone should have a set of guidelines for being a person and stick to this bottom line, then it will be difficult for others to bully you. After Zhu Yuanzhang became the ruler of the world, a childhood friend who shared weal and sorrow came to visit him in the palace. In order to show his credit, this person was embarrassed by Zhu Yuanzhang's childhood. At that time, Zhu Yuanzhang's family was very poor, so he took a broken jar to the ground to cook beans, climbed to the ground to pick up beans to eat, and accidentally ate a blade of grass stuck in his throat. This friend saved him. Zhu Yuanzhang's friend is an honest man who has no heart, but he said Zhu Yuanzhang's words in front of the court. Although he owed Zhu Yuanzhang, he made Zhu Yuanzhang angry and ordered someone to drag him out and behead him. Not knowing how to understand people's hearts is a characteristic of honest people who cause trouble for themselves. You have to be vigilant.
Around us, there are some timid people who can only swallow their pride in the face of other people's injuries, and their doubts are privately complained, but they never dare to face them. Timid and honest people are the easiest to lose, because they don't say anything, and in the end, they turn themselves back. Ask, when your belongings are stolen, honest people must not even have the courage to call the police, because they are full of concerns, worried about this, worried about that, and the more you accommodate him, the more you will hurt yourself, which is a manifestation of helping yourself to torture yourself. Not to mention losing one's own interests, the other party will be even more arrogant.
We usually say that an honest person will say that he is "wooden", clumsy, and does whatever you ask him to do, without his own ideas, and is not flexible. They are often bullied due to their submissive nature. To say that you're asking them to help you is actually telling them to do things, those people get a good deal but still sell themselves and look down on people who are used to being honest. People who are too soft-hearted are often seen as easy targets for bullying. Such people do not know how to say no to others. They often want to help others, but sometimes they are too kind, thus putting themselves in a vulnerable position. Here are some of the reasons:
The first reason is due to the softness of the heart. These people often find it difficult to say no to someone else's request. They are afraid of hurting other people's feelings, usually say yes, and invest a lot of time and energy in satisfying other people's requests. But in doing so, they risk becoming "makers" who sacrifice their own interests for the benefit of others and disrupt personal plans and schedules. There is a saying that if you ask someone, you will definitely be controlled by someone else. When your own ability is not enough, you need to help others, rely on others, you will be led by the nose by others, others tell you to go west, you can't go east, even if you know that you want to be manipulated and used by others, but because you are not capable, you can't rely on yourself to achieve your goals, you can only succumb to others and compromise. After all, the essence of interpersonal communication is the exchange of values. When you ask for help, you owe a favor, and sooner or later, you will have to pay for it, no matter how big or small.
The so-called low self-esteem is not believing in one's own worth, habitually valuing oneself negatively, believing that oneself does not deserve to have good things, and having a pessimistic attitude towards many things. If a person has such an opinion of himself, and everyone who comes into contact with him can feel that he is looking down on himself, then in the eyes of others, this person must be really bad, otherwise he will not look down on himself. Therefore, others will not respect such a person from the bottom of their hearts. If there is a trade-off, it will sacrifice its own interests first.
Life is like a fish drinking water, and it knows both cold and warm. Although the ancients said that loss is a blessing, the sadness and sadness after loss cannot be experienced by others, and all the bad is left to themselves. "Fu" is in **, no one can tell. In today's society, if a person is too easy to speak, has no opinions, and is always guilty, then most of them will be repeatedly kneaded into "soft persimmons" by others. Life can't be too easy to talk about, if you don't care about it equally, then just give up. There is no need for us to compromise in order to please a cold heart. Swallowing your pride will not help you get along well with others, but will make you a good person who is bullied by others.
Anger is the bottom line and measure of principle. When we feel angry, it means that we have touched a red line in our hearts, and to cross the past is to violate the ego. So anger is a signal that we need protection. It's true that anger sometimes doesn't translate into the results you want, but giving up anger means giving up your bottom line and your right to protect yourself. The next time something like this happens, you'll still compromise, pretend to be cool, and say nothing. In the long run, you will blur your principles and become a person who can be challenged and violated at will.
Lack of self-confidence is the main reason for being bullied. When a person lacks self-confidence, his lack of self-confidence will be reflected in all aspects, and his natural "aura" will be weak to the point, so it is easier to be in a weak position in interpersonal relationships and become the target of bullying.
Honest people are bullied not only because of external factors, but also because of internal factors. Honest people have character traits such as pedantic, sluggishness, dullness, and stubbornness, but they don't like change, don't dare to take risks, and like to stay in their comfort zone. When they encounter things, they never think about solving them, but habitually avoid them, always living in their own spiritual world.
Honest people like to put themselves on others, think too well of others, and trust others easily. When we were young, the elders around us always told us to be a "good person". However, when this so-called "good person" idea is overly misunderstood and distorted by people, a kind of person will appear, that is, a good person who is "full of kindness". In modern parlance, such a person is a person who is "overflowing with virginity." When they see someone in need, these people don't have to wait for someone to ask, they just rush over to help. As we all know, this "busyness" is most likely the beginning of bad luck.
In the workplace, there is a saying that good people don't waste. This kind of "good old man" character, to be honest, is the embodiment of people's blindness and simplicity, and the ugliness just shows people's innocence and unreality. We often say this phrase, "Shoot the bird". No matter what kind of occasion, people who are too pompous will attract the attention of many people at the first time, and at the same time, they will also cause many people to be dissatisfied. If you like to express yourself too much, it is easy to cause dissatisfaction with others and bring disaster.
When their interests are violated, some people choose to suffer in silence rather than actively fight for their rights. The reason why this is the case is that one is too concerned about what others think of him and thinks that he is calculating, and the other is that he is timid and afraid of things and does not dare to fight back. But in fact, only you can fight for your personal interests, if you don't fight for it, who will help you? When people see you being so cowardly, they will think that you are easy to bully.
Honesty should also have limitations, methods, and means, rather than being blindly used by others, which will only bind oneself and break one's heart. Those who let themselves be wronged often have the characteristics of being sensible, but if they are too sensible, they are easy to be bullied, so don't be stupid and don't be honest. Kindness and honesty must also have their own edge, otherwise you will be an honest and good person all your life but have long been excluded by others, the interests are not in you, and the opportunity will always be far away from you.