1 I was in a bad mood, I went out for a walk, and before I knew it, I walked a few streets, and I was tired of wanting to go home. I saw a shared bicycle on the side of the road, and I was ready to ride home! At this time, a handsome guy held down the car, and I said: I came first, you know how to come first and then come, right? The handsome guy was silent, lowered his head and took out **: Mom, I complain that you bought me a yellow bicycle, I don't have to play this afternoon, just looking at the car, I was almost ridden away several times!
2 In a market in Guangzhou, an uncle who sells fruit begins to sing pop songs in Cantonese in order to attract customers. Although his singing skills are mediocre, he is full of enthusiasm. Passers-by were attracted by his performance and stopped one after another. A passing child also joined in and sang along with the uncle. This impromptu ** meeting attracted a lot of customers, and the uncle's fruit was quickly sold out.
3 One day, Xiaojun wrote an essay in the classroom: "My Home".
Xiaojun wrote: "My family has three people, my father and mother, and I, as soon as we go out every morning, the three of us go our separate ways, go our separate ways, and end up the same way in the evening.
Dad is an architect, and he points fingers on the construction site every day; Mom is a salesperson, and she doesn't refuse anyone to come to the store every day; I'm a student, and I'm stuck in the classroom every day.
The three members of my family smell the same, and the family is harmonious, but when my grades are not good, my father also fights in the same room, and beats me cruelly, and my mother stands by and watches, never seeing righteousness and bravery. ”
4 Today, I took an 8-year-old son to the orchard to buy cherries, tasted a cherry and said: "This is a cherry, it doesn't smell like a fart!" I haven't responded yet, and her son said, "It's not spending money to buy fart, of course it doesn't smell like a fart."
5 There was a man who left a guest to drink tea, because there was no tea, so he went to the neighbor's house to borrow it. For a long time, the neighbor did not send it, and the water was boiled, but it was not brought, so I had no choice but to keep adding cold water to the pot. After a long time, the water in the pot was full, and the tea was not delivered, and the wife said to her husband, "The tea is not ready, so it is better to leave him to take a bath." ”
6 Once I went to take a nap at a classmate, and she asked me if I wanted a quilt.
I said I could cover my belly button.
Unexpectedly, she took a piece of glasses cloth from the glasses case and handed it to me.
7 The naked man ran to the parking lot, and the uncle who guarded the door stared at the naked man intently, and the naked man said shyly: Don't look at me like this, everyone is a man!
The janitor: Oh, I have bad eyes, and I haven't seen if you're a man or a woman after looking at it for a long time!
8 I took my son out to play, my son was too naughty, and the people next to me said that he was a child without a tutor, and I was very angry when I heard it: "Why do you say that he has no tutor?" ”
Man: "What did I say?" You're his father, aren't you? I'll talk to you about it! ”
I didn't see that it was right, so I quickly replied: "No, I am the tutor hired by this child's father." ”
9 In the subway, I heard a girl calling her boyfriend **, and she said this: "I'm already in xxx, you come out and go to the subway station." If you arrive and I haven't arrived yet, you can wait. If I arrive and you haven't arrived, just wait. ”
10My dad has always been very talkative and loves to eat snacks. I remember one day when I was in elementary school, I was left late by my teacher. Halfway through, I saw my father coming to pick me up from a distance, still nibbling on a sugar cane in his mouth. When they saw me, they didn't say a word, silently folded the sugarcane into 2 sections, and then our father and daughter gnawed on the sugarcane and went home, without saying a word all the way. Now that I think about it, it's very loving.
11 Heroes don't ask where they come from, and they don't care about their age.
Just now I was walking down the pedestrian street, and there was an old woman on the other side, and when I passed her, she grabbed my arm and slowly lay down, and I thought to myself: It's over.
After more than ten seconds, the old grandmother suddenly stood up by herself, patted the ashes on her body, and said: "The child's thorns are not exciting, life is full of surprises, help you relieve the pressure."
After saying that, the old grandmother left, hey, I'll go, the hero doesn't ask where he comes from, and he is greedy for fun regardless of age!