Hello everyone, welcome to "Couple's Daily Funny Dialogue":
It is said that there is no horse spoon that does not touch the edge of the pot, and the flirting and quarreling between husband and wife are like storms in nature, looking at it from another angle, it is also the spice of the family, and the joy of life can also be understood as the unique mood between husband and wife.
A newlywed couple returned from their honeymoon, and before the husband went to work, his wife asked him what he wanted to eat when he came back, and the husband said gently, ".I just want to eat you.
When the husband opened the door after work, he found his wife running around the room in her underwear, and the husband asked in surprise, "What are you doing?" ”
Mrs. smiled and said, ".I'm in hot dishes.
The husband of the second goods
When I quarreled with my husband and the quarrel was very strong, I couldn't help but shout loudly:Can you stand in my place and think about it!
My husband was stunned for a moment, then pushed me aside, stood where I was just standing, thought for a while, and saidYou have to change positions after a fight, you are so special!
Walking in the square with my husband one after the other, a pigeon flew by, and a stall of pigeon poop fell on me impartially, so I called my husband: "The pigeon is pooping, get the paper!" ”
My husband looked up and said, "It doesn't pay attention to hygiene and pulls casually, why are you calling me, let me catch up and wipe its buttocks?" ”
I ......
The girlfriend said: "My first boyfriend was a Chaos Seller, and I won't eat Chaos anymore after we break up!" The second boyfriend opened an Internet café, and I stopped using the Internet after the breakup! The third is ......”
Without waiting for my girlfriend to finish, I said, "Then you can't leave me." “
The girlfriend asked curiously, "Why?" “
Me: "Because I'm a seller of clothes!" “
Hahaha, you can only follow me for the rest of your life! ）
There is no rest time at work every day, and my wife complains: "Everyone else has paid leave, why don't I have it!" ”
I comforted and said, "Wife, if you are tired, ask for leave to rest and rest!" ’
The wife said, "No, I want to divorce you and remarry, so that I will have paid leave." “
I'll go, you think it's a child's house.
I've gained a lot of weight recently, and my husband always teases me, saying that I'm about to get fat into a lump of meat.
On this day, my husband began to complain that I was too fat again, and I slapped him in the face when I was angry, saying that I was too much, and I didn't give a good face and said: "Who is too much, you say that I am fat first." He actually replied: "I said it because you got fat first!" ”
Well! I said it when you got fat first! It's kind of interesting. ）
At night, my wife was lying on the couch watching TV while I mopped the floor. Suddenly, she ordered me to give her my phone, and I glared at her and said, "Won't you use the word 'please'?" ”
My wife said, "Hurry up and bring my mobile phone." ”
I resigned, "Yes, wife."
A bearded man wanted to surprise his wife, so he shaved his beard and quietly hid under the covers at night.
His wife woke up in a daze, touched his head, and said in surprise, "Honey, you are still there!" My husband is coming back soon, so let's go! ”
Brothers, what's going on! I heard you right! 」
My wife asked me, "Husband, do you know what is the strongest in the world?" ”
I shook my head to say I didn't know!
The wife smiled and said, "It's your beard." ”
I was full of question marks and asked in surprise, "Why?" ”
The wife laughed and said, "Because your skin is so thick, it can still break through the skin." ”
One word, absolutely! 」
My husband usually never drinks under my teaching, but on the night of New Year's Day, my husband came back late when he was drunk, and he walked staggeringly, smelling of alcohol, and I was angry when I saw it. However, being angry is angry, thinking that it is better to cook him some porridge or something like that to warm his stomach. Just after boiling the bowl and about to serve it over, my husband seemed to have woken up, fell from the sofa and fell to the ground, kneeling and shouting while crawling: "Daughter-in-law, I know it's wrong, I don't dare anymore, don't be ** husband, one day husband and wife for a hundred days, you spare me!" ”
At that time, I laughed so much that I couldn't breathe, and I dared to love this husband who regarded himself as a martial artist.
Oops, my mother, I'm laughing to death! 」
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