Two days ago, I saw a question like this on the Internet: How to tell if a man loves you or not? There is an answer at the bottom, I am quite impressed, saying that it depends on whether this man wants to have a relationship with you.
To be honest, as an emotional counselor, this is really the dumbest answer I've ever heard. Men who love you do have lust for you, but in the cases we handled, many men separated sex and love. Just because a man wants to have sex with you doesn't mean he loves you, and the two can't be equated. So she's right, not quite.
There are also some girls who may think that men like virtuous and considerate and empathetic, so after getting married, they put the family first and put all their focus on their husbands and children, but they were let down, and the man didn't cherish it, and he made a situation outside.
So what kind of woman does a man love the most? Actually, there are two points:"Independent" "Little bad", which can be said to be an "independent bad woman". Let's talk about them one by one.
I interviewed a male student before, and he said this: "I have been married to my wife for almost seven years, and after giving birth to a child, she has not gone to work, she takes care of the children full-time at home, does not dress herself, dresses very casually, takes care of the children every day, does housework, and shouts tired every day."
Later, I couldn't help it, and cheated on a female subordinate of the company, because this girl is young and beautiful, can care about people, and has strong work ability, although I don't like it much, but I think it's better than my wife, and we slowly developed into physical partners. ”
In fact, from this man's words, it is obvious that he is very reasonable and does not feel that there is anything wrong with his cheating. To put it mildly, it's completely like treating your wife as a free babysitter, and when you get tired of it, you will find another lover outside.
So through this case, what does the teacher want to tell you? It is necessary to have your own independent life, and have your own career as much as possible, don't just revolve around the stove, around your husband and children.
Take me and my wife as an example, in fact, I can say to my wife now: "Wife, you don't have to go to work, I have the ability to support you, you can chase dramas at home every day, and you can do housework."
But I won't, why? Because I don't want her to lose herself after marrying me, I know that she also has her own ambition and her own pursuits, and I can't decide her lifestyle for her.
For a good marriage, or a good relationship, the pace of two people should be the same, and two people should make progress together. I see that she is busy with work every day and shines in the field she loves, and I am very happy for her. Usually when something goes wrong for her at work, I will encourage her, just like she unconditionally supports my career.
A man who really loves you, he definitely doesn't want you to pour all your energy and all your love into him, he wants you to love yourself well while loving him.
If you can always remain independent, live your own life, and live your life to the fullest, men will also be attracted by your high energy and value, and admire you, and at the same time, you will be more confident in this relationship.
Okay, this is what we call "independence", and then "little bad". Attention, what about the "bad" that the teacher is talking about here is not to let everyone be a scumbag, but what?
You can't be too well-behaved in your relationship, you have to have a little bit of your own little badness, you can't obey men in everything, the feeling that a man wants to get but can't get it, will make him very good.
In fact, the charm of Sun Yining, a girl, in addition to her appearance, lies in her unique "bad spirit".
For a man like Wang Sicong, who is invincible in his relationship, pursuing Sun Yining is a challenge for him, which can well arouse his desire to conquer, men are like this, the more they can't get it, the more they want it.
What we usually hear is "men are not bad, women are not loved", but in fact, women are the same, women are a little bad, and men will love more. It's not that good girls are bad, but men mostly seek thrills.
In the previous lesson, I also told you that the more role you play in a man's heart, the more important you are to him, and the more he will be inseparable from you.
For example, you can play the three roles of saint, comrade-in-arms, and "goblin" at the same time, and become a combination of these roles, you can be gentle and considerate to a man, support him, and be his interpreter flower, or you can occasionally show your rebellion and have your own life mood, so that men can't fully figure it out. Feelings are different from other things, it's not how much you pay for him, how much he will repay you.
If a woman is too well-behaved, frames herself in a box, and only knows how to be good to men and pay for men, then after a long time, the man may feel that it is not interesting, and he may even abandon you because other women treat him better.
If you want to keep a man's heart, it's not that you think about how to be good to him every day, and you want to keep his stomach and kidneys, but what?
It is that you must first love yourself, put your own needs first, and love yourself first before you can be loved. At the same time, a little bad, make yourself the most special and valuable person in a man's heart, so that he will be willing to be a "good man" for you.