Psychologist Zhang Peijuan Three critical periods of children s growth

Mondo Parenting Updated on 2024-02-01

Behind the excellent children is the excellent family education model, and the different education methods of parents give the children a different life. Grasp the three stages of children's growth: 0-6 years old with heart, 6-12 years old to cultivate ability, 12-18 years old respect children. Children will benefit for a lifetime.

0-6 years old is a key stage in the formation of children's personality characteristics, living habits, and values. Zhang Peijuan, a teacher from the research center, said: The most important period in life is the period of 0-6 years old. Not only is human intelligence formed at this stage, but also human psychology is finalized at this stage.

Therefore, the sooner parents know about the following two suggestions, the sooner their children will benefit.

1. Establish a sense of security

0-3 years old is a critical period for children to establish a sense of security, during this period whether parents can establish a sense of security for children, determines the child's lifelong emotional connection with the outside world.

After the child is born, everything around him is unknown. Through their parents' expressions, demeanor, and voices, they gradually build up their understanding of the world. It can be said that children before the age of 3 are mentally and psychologically symbiotic with their mothers. During this time, if the child is well cared for, he will feel comfortable and content, establishing an initial sense of security.

2. Character training

When the child reaches about 3 years old, his personality is also revealed. During this period, many things can change a child's personality. In the first few years of life, if a child is subjected to injury, violence, or other obstacles, his personality development will deviate.

If the child's character defects are formed after birth, then 3-6 years old can **. Because 3-6 years old is the best period for the adjustment and correction of a child's personality. Therefore, the effective companionship of parents can not only allow the child to build a good character, but also correct it in time if the child's personality deviates.

Children between the ages of 6 and 12 are an important period for parents to develop good habits and qualities. Therefore, parents should pay special attention to the cultivation of children's habits. Before the age of 12, children must develop excellent living habits and study habits.

The first is lifestyle habits. Some time ago, the "fairy child-Jiang Yao" who swiped the screen in the circle of parents was admitted to Tsinghua University at the age of 16 and graduated with a doctorate at the age of 24. This teenager not only has good study habits, but also has strong self-discipline. The first thing I do when I get home from school is to do my homework, study, and not only that, but I also do more housework, so I don't have to worry about my parents at all. "People**" also listed the age comparison table of children doing housework, and pointed out that housework is an indispensable part of children's growth.

Looking at those children with excellent grades, they all have good habits of life in their parents' hearts, not only love to learn, but also know how to do housework, and their self-care ability does not need to worry about their parents.

The second is study habits. The biggest educational event in 2022 is that the class time of Chinese has reached 20%-22%, which is the absolute top priority. This requires children to read more broadly, and the more they read, the wider the world they see.

Those stories that have been read, the insights that have been harvested, and the temperament that have been impregnated are like a seed that will slowly sprout and grow in the child's body and constantly improve their cognition. For most children, reading and learning is still the best way to change their fate, enhance their personal value, and even reverse family poverty. A good study habit is the key to a child's excellence in the future.

12-18 years old, respect children. Children, regardless of their age, yearn for equality of thought and feelings. Children are independent individuals, and the last thing parents should do on the road of educating children is to use parental authority to oppress their children. After becoming parents, we began to learn and introspect, and understood the truth that "children are independent individuals and should be respected by us".

The first key to respecting children is to respect their feelings. There is a saying: a child is the way his parents treat him to the world. The way a child perceives the world is how parents react to their children.

The second key to respect is to respect the law of children's growth. "Three points of teaching, seven points and so on", educating and nurturing a child is a long-term and difficult process. It takes time for children to grow and develop, and parents and teachers should be patient and wait for their children to grow.

Adolescent children are prone to rebellion and have a rebellious mentality, which is related to the fact that children at these two stages are in a very unstable stage of psychology. Therefore, when the child enters puberty, parents must know how to respect the child, correct the way of education, and stop yelling at the child.

As a parent, it is important to remember: the validity period of parents is very short, only ten years. Don't wait for your child to grow up and then discipline and make amends, when it's too late.

The best family education is to be a good parent in these three stages: 0-6 years old companion, 6-12 years old coach, 12-18 years old respect.

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Fish & Sea Education, is an institution that focuses on adolescent psychological counseling. In the past 8 years, it has provided high-quality services to more than 38,000 families. The exclusive research and development of "Concentric Circles Family Education Ecosystem" has been upgraded to the seventh generation; The "581 Dual System Dynamic Adjustment Method" based on "concentric circles" has been highly praised by a large number of parents.

The predecessor of Fish and Sea Education is the "Fish and Sea Psychology Exchange Group", which was established in 2015, and the eight co-sponsors are education leaders, primary and secondary school teachers, college teachers, hospital psychiatrists, and experts in the psychological counseling industry. After the establishment of the studio, andIn 2019, it was operated as a company, with the research center located in Beijing and the operation center set up in Zhengzhou.

Fish & Sea Education has always attached great importance to product research and development. Its subordinate [Fish and Sea Family Education Research Center] regularly holds product seminars, and there are more than 100 seminars at present. At the same time, the center cooperates with colleges and universities, and invites a number of university psychology professors and psychology doctors to serve as researchers.

Yuhehai Education explored the guidance model of "offline + online" earlier, and became a pioneer in the field of adolescent psychology in March 2020. The online guidance service, which was launched due to the sudden epidemic, has been very popular due to its privacy, convenience and efficiency, and has unique advantages, and has achieved significantly more guidance results than offline.

Adhere to refined service. In 2020, Yuhehai launched the "2020-2025 Fine Project", proposing to be before 2025"Only 3,000 families are served each year".

Stick to warm actions. In 2016, "Fish and Sea Public Welfare" was established. In the past 6 years, "Fish and Sea Charity" has affected more than 1,000 families and touched 10,000+ children.

Continue to output original content. Up to now, the top platforms of Yuhehai Education have published original youth psychological science articlesarticle, Zhihu answeredArticle, popular science**, the total number of views has exceeded one million.

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Editor-in-chief of the column: Qin Zhiyu.

Interview editor Ye Qinghe.

Produced by Fish and Sea Family Education Research Center.

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