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Dry Chai Pavilion
When I went out to eat with my boyfriend at night, I saw the neon lights flashing in a store, and I looked at it with my humble eyes, and three words loomed: "Ganchai Pavilion." ”
I pulled my boyfriend and pointed to it, and said, "Look at the name of that store, Ganchaige, it's so strange, why don't we go and have a look." ”
My boyfriend glanced at the flashing words, slowly approached me, held my face with both hands, and looked at me affectionately, I thought he was going to kiss me, my boyfriend said to me: "You are blind, that is Qianzi Pavilion!" After speaking, he laughed and mocked me: "Ganchaige." Haha, I'm laughing to death. ”
The husband and the family stood at the door of the delivery room, waiting for the wife to go into labor.
The door opened, and the cry of a child was heard, and the whole family rushed up. The husband couldn't wait to reach out and touch it, touched a thin pillar of flesh, and shouted happily, "Wow! It's a boy, it's a boy! ”
Who knew that ** pushed him, and said angrily: "What boy?" You hold my fingers, let go! ”
I paid a bunch of expenses for my daughter, such as tuition, accommodation fees, and health fees, and on the way back, I said to her: You have spent me a lot of money! Daughter: Dad, you're an investment! Me: How much can I get in return? Her: Dad, don't you know that investment is risky??! Well, I know now.
I accidentally bumped into a woman and happened to touch the sugar gourd she was holding in her hand, and I immediately apologized and told her that I would buy her a new one. But she was very arrogant and pointed to the sugar gourds scattered on the ground and said: "If you have red dates in the hawthorn, you must compensate me for the same one." I smiled, calmly went to the place that sold sugar gourds to buy one, brought it to her and said, "Look at it." Then when she fell to the ground in front of her, she said, "Exactly the same." Woman: "I'll go, what a handsome move!" ”
An old couple was waiting for the bus, and they didn't come for a long time, so they lit a cigarette and just took a puff, and the bus came! The old woman complained on the side: "Let you bear with it, this is a waste of a cigarette." "The old man is in a hurry, this is a Chinese cigarette, it costs two yuan a cigarette, and it can't be wasted. So, he started to suck a lot, trying to finish it before the car arrived. The old woman looked at the car and encouraged him: "There is still a piece of eight, and there is still a piece of five, one piece." ”
One day, a young couple was walking on the road. Passing by a cold drink shop, the man bought an ice cream for his wife.
At this time, a little girl next to him kept staring at him. The man smiled and asked, "Little sister, do you want to eat ice cream?" The little girl nodded. The man said, "Then I will buy you the one that sounds good!" ”
The little girl thought for a while, and called sweetly: "Husband! ”
When my girlfriend first came to my house, there were three rooms in the house, and my girlfriend insisted on sleeping alone.
Who knew that my parents, who had never quarreled in the middle of the night, quarreled because of a trivial matter, smashed things, completely disregarded the image in front of my girlfriend, and spoke viciously to each other, losing all my face!
What's even worse is that my dad actually wants to do it! So my mom ran to my room crying, and I had no choice but to go to my girlfriend's room and squeeze it!
Later, I learned that this was my parents' strategy, and sure enough, ginger was still old and spicy!
At an electronics store in Shanghai, a customer tries out the latest virtual reality equipment. He got too involved and started walking around the store, crashing into the display shelves, causing a bit of confusion. The surrounding customers and clerks couldn't help but laugh, and the customers joined in the laughter after taking off their helmets.
My wife's cooking is always salty, but tonight it tasted surprisingly good, and I asked, "Why isn't it salty today?" The wife said, "There is no salt in the house." I wondered, "I don't think it tastes light without salt!" My wife said, "I didn't wash the dishes at noon." ”
Lying in bed at night, I asked my daughter-in-law: "Should a man focus on his career or his family?" ”
My daughter-in-law was silent, and then I remembered the classic line: "I can't hold you when I carry bricks, and I won't have the hands to move bricks when I hold you." ”
Then the daughter-in-law came and said, "You can carry me to move bricks!" ”
Is this a daughter-in-law? )
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