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The son was playing in the community at home when he heard someone talking: "Xiao Ming's mother is a shrew!" ”
When the son came home, he asked his mother curiously, "Mom, why do so many people say that you are a shrew?" ”
Mother: "That's when they praised your mother for being a lively woman."
Unexpectedly, when my son went to his grandmother's house, when he saw his grandmother, he asked, "Grandma, are you a shrew?" ”
My boyfriend said on my birthday that he was going to give me 99 roses, which I was looking forward to!
As a result, on his birthday, he gave a bag of rose tea!
The boyfriend said: "It's not just more than that, you don't have to worry about withering here, it's beautiful and beautiful!" The key is cheap! ”“
This is really a good boyfriend in China!
The tortoise invites the hare to race, and the hare is that your ancestors have beaten us once, so don't be delusional. The turtle throws out a hundred-dollar bill: this is your appearance fee! The rabbit suddenly laughed and said, "Master Turtle, I will run as much as you tell me to run."
I said to the Goddess: I want to take care of you for the rest of my life.
The goddess thought for a moment and said, "Good!
Then she took me to meet her mother: Mom, I'll introduce you to a partner, and if I like you, I'll get married.
Am I surprised? Goddess Dao: Didn't you say that you want to take care of me for the rest of my life, if I am my husband, in case of divorce, I can't take care of me for a lifetime, and when I am a father, it will be different, I will definitely be able to take care of me for a lifetime!
I once went shopping with my foodie cousin, and there were a lot of people, and her clothes were rubbed with oil by the people next to her. It's her new coat! My cousin was about to lose her temper in an instant, and when she turned her head to look, the man was holding a few big meat skewers, she smelled it hard, Mom, it was so fragrant, and my cousin immediately smiled and asked: Big brother, where did you buy it?
Yesterday I had dinner at my parents' house, and my parents fried several dishes for me, and I also bought hairy crabs!
My parents saw that I didn't move my chopsticks, and unanimously advised me: "Eat!" Eat! ”
I was so embarrassed: "Dad! Mom! You eat first, and I'll eat what you have left!" ”
My mother praised me: "I can't imagine that you are so sensible when you get married and go out to live!" ”
Dad's nose was sour: "You tell me the truth, how long has your daughter-in-law abused you like this!" ”
We often boil water in our dormitory.
One night, my roommate had just plugged in the heat when he heard a "bang" and the room went dark.
At this time, the trembling voice of my roommate came: "Am I blinded by the bombing?" ”
Turn on the computer to write something, the first word is typed "no", but it always shows "Pi", no matter how you try.
In the end, after four or five minutes of tossing, I used my wits to find out the root cause: who turned on the underline state!
I cleaned my son's room and found my son's diary on the desk, I flipped through it at the time, and there was a diary that read:
Today, Uncle Chen came to my house to play, so he picked up my mother, told my uncle to be careful, my uncle said it was okay, and kissed me again, and my mother said to hurry up and go to homework.
I went to the living room angrily and confronted my wife: "You loser, you actually steal behind my back." “
My wife was puzzled, and I took my son's diary and read:
Today, Uncle Chen came to my house to play, so he picked up my mother, told my uncle to be careful, my uncle said it was okay, and kissed me again, and my mother said to hurry up and go to homework.
Disgusting, still doing homework, phew, shameless. I pointed to my daughter-in-law's nose and scolded, "Divorce." “
His wife is a monk with a question mark on her face.
My son ran over and snatched the diary from my hand and said, "Dad, you peeked at my diary again, and besides, what was written in my diary was: 'Today, Uncle Chen came to my house to play, so he picked me up, and my mother told my uncle to be careful, and my uncle said it was okay and kissed me again, and my mother said, 'Hurry up and do your homework.'" Don't blame Mom, it's me who didn't punctuate it. “
After saying that, my son cried!
At that time, I was embarrassed and quickly apologized to my daughter-in-law.
Well? Hahaha, you're fucking laughing at me!
The first checkered pajamas in the department store have numbers in the checkered box.
I wondered and asked, "What kind of design is this?" ”
The saleswoman said, "This is a new product, if the back is itchy, you can tell your wife and scratch it in square 17." ”
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