01
I always wanted to find someone who was literate and could talk with me about things in books and books, which was also my dream when I was young. ”
This is Lao Ding's confession to Jiang Defu, and it is also helplessness to reality.
He wanted to marry a literate woman all his life and enter the door, but unfortunately the heavens did not fulfill people's wishes.
Lao Ding married Wang Xiu'e involuntarily and was helpless, because it was an arranged marriage arranged by the family, so he couldn't refuse, so he could only marry her step by step.
After marriage, Lao Ding's dislike for her was overflowing, and the sentence "You are the best, don't say anything, let my ears be quiet and quiet" is enough to see Lao Ding's impatience with Wang Xiu'e.
After Wang Xiu'e died, Lao Ding finally had the opportunity to marry a literate person, first Wu Yizhu and then Teacher Ge, all of whom were just one foot away.
The reason for this result is that he has been waiting for pie to fall from the sky, wanting but not wanting to give.
Jiang Defu was willing to cut off his future for An Jie, and An Jie, a capitalist lady, was also willing to go to the countryside for him, and Lao Ding, when he saw that his future would be threatened by marrying Mr. Ge, he gave up decisively;
When he wanted to marry Wu Yizhu, he saw that the family was married for the second time, and the two immediately broke up.
Maybe he just didn't have that life.
He can't marry a literate woman, but he needs a woman to help him take care of the family.
In this case, he still bowed his head to reality and was "forced" to marry Dehua, a rural woman who was wholeheartedly good to him.
He said to Dehua, "Otherwise, if we get married, we won't trouble others", a sentence revealing helplessness and breaking jars.
In fact, the moment when Lao Ding decided to marry Jiang Dehua was the greatest sorrow in his life.
One,Lao Ding was forced to marry Dehua, in fact, it was more of the most ruthless compromise and revenge on fate.
It was because of compromise that he wiped out his happiness and future with his own hands.
Although Dehua is an extremely good woman, she loves Lao Ding to the core, but Lao Ding doesn't love her.
After marriage, the two seem to have a good life, but in fact, no one understands Lao Ding's "pain", and he has not realized the dream of "chatting with his beloved and talking about books in his spare time".
There is no doubt that his heart is bitter!
Second,Lao Ding married Dehua, and he was destined to never fulfill his wish to marry a literate person in his life.
He married Dehua out of desperation and necessity, and it was a compromise with reality.
Just like when he said to Jiang Defu at the beginning: "In the past, my parents had no choice, but now I am free, and I have the final say, but I can look for it, and finally I find someone who is uneducated, do you think I am this fate?" I'm destined to have nothing to do with a cultured woman? ”
And he compromised because he didn't think he had a choice.
But in fact, Lao Ding has the ability and opportunity to realize his dream of marrying a literate person.
But he didn't grasp it.
InAt the beginning, he and Mr. Ge were close to becoming husband and wife, but in the face of the choice of love, marriage and career future, he was timid and cowardly and lacked courage, but he chose his career future and decisively gave up love.
He said: "I have my seventy or eighty-year-old father and mother to support, and now I have four wolf-like sons to raise, what should I do when I go home?" ”
It's very realistic but also very helpless, but if he can have the courage to marry An Jie like Jiang Defu at the beginning, maybe he can also tie the knot with Teacher Ge.
Although the official position will be demoted in that way, Jiang Defu, as a good brother, will definitely not stand idly by.
It's just that he didn't, he didn't even have the courage to take a step.
Lao Ding envied Jiang Defu's life, marrying a cultural woman was a fulfillment he had never obtained in his life, and after marrying Dehua, this wish was destined to be unfulfillable in this life.
Thirdly,Lao Ding is reluctant to marry Dehua, but he enjoys everything that Dehua brings him with peace of mind, and he is not willing to face Dehua's feelings head-on, he is not only selfish but also very selfish.
He wants both the perfect career and the perfect love, but he can't have both.
Just like Jiang Defu said: Where can I let me do any good thing!
So that's itThe reason why Lao Ding's marriage has regrets is actually part of this reason: too greedy!
However, although Lao Ding's marriage is the pain and regret of his life, after he married Dehua, the quality of life has not decreased but increased, and in life, he has no regrets.
The biggest sorrow in Lao Ding's life is the imperfection of his marriage, he longs to talk about the world like Jiang Defu Anjie, and longs to have a topic to talk about with his wife and figure it out spiritually.
As the saying goes, three points of destiny, seven points of people! Because of some of his own reasons, he only achieved worry-free food and clothing, but did not achieve spiritual happiness.
He is regretful, but there will always be regrets in a person's life, and it is precisely because of regrets that there are years to look back on.