Yan Lei and I have been in love for three years, and when we were about to talk about marriage, we were very unhappy because of the bride price!
Yan Lei means that we are married because of love, and there should be no bride price or dowry. He said: Only people who are emotionally unstable or don't love deeply enough will feel that the bride price is their confidence.
My idea is the opposite of his, that the bride price is the importance of the man to the woman, and the dowry is the blessing of the woman's parents to the daughter, no matter how much, it is the support of the two families for the newborn family!
I insisted on asking for a bride price, and at that time we had a bride price of about 100,000 yuan, and I asked for 100,000 yuan, and my father said that they would marry 100,000 yuan, and the bride price would be given to me.
100,000 yuan Yan Lei said that he could take it out, but he just didn't want to give it, saying that if he gave this money, he felt that our marriage would change and become a marriage because of money.
I don't think he really cares about me at all, doesn't really love me. For this reason, the two of us quarreled and quarreled, and after more than half a year, I said that if we want to get married, we must have a bride price.
Yan Lei's parents also agreed, saying that the bride price is not unique to our family, which is a normal thing. Friends also said, the relationship between the two of you is so good, isn't the bride price a trivial matter?
In the end, Yan Lei's family gave 100,000 dowry, and our wedding date was set, and I thought we would live happily for the rest of our lives, but as a result, the wedding day was very unpleasant.
The bridesmaids I invited were all my best friends, and we usually knew each other well, and I didn't make much trouble, but when I asked him for red envelopes, he took two and refused to give them again, and the bridesmaids had four.
The other two bridesmaids who didn't have red envelopes stopped him from entering, and he said with a straight face: How much more do you have to cost? It made both bridesmaids very embarrassed, and I also felt a little embarrassed.
The day after we got married, we had dinner at my in-laws' place, and Yan Lei would support me to do this, and then to do that, but he sat there motionless.
I said, don't just talk about it, do it yourself! He said, "I paid for your marriage, and if you want money, you have to work."
I was stunned for a moment and said what are you talking about? Mother-in-law was on the sidelines: There should be a degree of joking, don't talk nonsense.
I asked him again what he meant, but he was silent, and said, "You have to show more on your first day as a new daughter-in-law, I am creating opportunities for you!"
We had a separate marriage room, and I thought the world would be very happy, but a few days after we got married, we had a big fight, and I completely understood what he really thought.
We both went to work, he got off work earlier than me, and every time I got home, he was lying on the couch and doing nothing.
At first, I thought it was just two people, and it was okay at night, who would do it differently? When I come back, I cook and wash, clean up the housework, he eats when I cook, and leaves when I finish eating, and I don't wash the dishes!
I said to him: You can wash the dishes if you don't cook, right? If you don't do the laundry, can you dry it for me?
He said, "It's all you have to do, why should I do it?" ”
I said, what should I do as a family, shouldn't you do it?
He said something I'll never forget: "Because you took the money, it's up to you to do all the housework!" ”
I was stunned by what he said: I collected money, what money did I collect?
He said that you received the bride price, 100,000 yuan! I was furious: my parents brought back the bride price money, don't you know?
He: It's yours to bring back, the bride price comes to your house, and it becomes a dowry when you come back! The dowry is your own money, and it has nothing to do with me!
I had a fight with him, and he said one of my most memorable words: If you get married and receive money from my family, you will sell yourself to our family!
I thought I understood the knot in his heart, so I tried to communicate with him, and I took out the 200,000 yuan my parents gave me, saying that this has a bride price and a dowry, and it is the common property of our small family.
He said I wasn't in it for the money, and I didn't care about 100,000 yuan.
I think I am sincere to you, but you have to let me use the bride price to prove my love for you, and use money to give you a sense of security, I think in your heart, money is more important than me!
I said, "I have my thoughts, and if you think it's wrong for me to do this, I apologize to you." ”
I took out the money and handed it to him: "From this moment on, this money is not a bride price or a dowry, it is the support of our original family for our small family!" ”
He was a little awkward at first, seeing that I was sincere, he said that the economic power of our family is in your hands, and you can just hold it yourself!
I told him my thoughts again, saying that I am not for the sake of face, nor for the sake of security, and that our thoughts may be different, but I believe that you will give me happiness and will give you happiness!
Yan Lei said that he had figured it out and would not bother with this matter anymore! Even if we had different ideas at the beginning, the matter would be over, and we would just be able to live a good life in the future.
I think that even if people love each other again, sometimes there will be differences, as long as you talk about it, there will be no barriers in the future life, and it will lead to happiness!