Caigen Tan once said: "Fu Mo is blessed with few things, and disaster is not bad for many hearts." ”
This statement is profound and expresses the true meaning of life.
If you have less to do, you will be calm, and if you have more, you will be worried. In life, if you are tired of trivial things every day, your soul will inevitably be as heavy as lead.
Carrying a tired soul on our backs, we will only drift away from happiness.
In this complex world, some people are destined to pass us by, and some things are already destined to be unchangeable.
Therefore, we need to learn to let go of the four things that we cannot control.
In this way, we can live a chic and calm life, not burdened by the world, and not burdened by worries.
What has passed is no longer concernedIn the long road of life, everyone will have a few heart knots that are difficult to untie and memories that are difficult to let go.
However, revisiting the past again and again is like pouring salt on the wounds of the old days again and again, and becoming one's biggest tormentor.
In fact, there are no hurdles in life that cannot be overcome.
When we truly learn to let go, time will become the gentlest **, quietly healing all the scars.
Simon Hao in "Fatigue of Life and Death", the former hard-working and kind landlord, his life was full of grievances and injustices.
He had never done anything unreasonable, but he was killed for no reason, and the resentment in his heart was as hard to quench as fire.
In the underworld, he shouted injustices every day, which made the king of Hades annoyed, and finally was beaten into the animal path, and went through the suffering of the sixth reincarnation.
In the reincarnation of the sixth world, Simon tasted the ups and downs of the world.
He threw himself into the form of a donkey, biting and beating people in anger, but in the end he ended up being eaten by the villagers.
Reincarnated as an ox, the grievances in his heart were deeper, but he was betrayed by his son and tortured to death;
When he became a pig, he gradually forgot his past grievances and learned to enjoy the peace of the present;
Transformed into a dog, he faithfully guards the home for his master, and the anger in his heart dissipates;
And when he transforms into a monkey, he finally lets go of his hatred completely, and his heart regains peace.
Balzac once profoundly pointed out that if life is burdened by the past, it is difficult to move forward.
Indeed, sometimes, we suffer precisely because we are trapped in the shadows of the past.
Always dwelling on the pain of the past, we are like trapped in the cage of memories and unable to break free.
Entanglement with past grievances will only allow you to struggle with endless grievances.
However, life is not all about memories, we also have the present and the future.
The only thing you can do is to learn to turn the page and forget if you can.
No longer repeatedly uncover the scar that has healed, and give the wound a chance to truly heal.
Wang Yangming once admonished**:
If the grass is in the way, it is advisable to go, just go; Even if you don't go immediately, you won't be tired. ”
In the same way, we should remove the weeds from our hearts and free ourselves from the shackles of memory.
Cherish the people in front of you, cherish the things in front of you, and live every moment wholeheartedly.
Don't worry about things that haven't happened yetDeep in the vast Sahara Desert, there is an earthy grey gerbil with peculiar habits.
As the dry season approaches, these gerbils begin their busy life of hoarding grassroots.
They toiled day and night, as if they were stockpiling endless energy for the impending crisis.
Yet, inexplicably, even when the grass roots are piling up more than they need, the gerbils still don't stop.
They searched against the clock, as if they could never fill their fears and uneasiness.
Eventually, most of the grass roots that have been hoarded have rotted under the erosion of time and become useless waste.
While other animals enjoy their leisurely time, gerbils live tired and anxious.
They are always worried about the unknown disaster, as if the next second will be the end of the catastrophe.
This catastrophic thought, like an invisible shackle, binds their minds and makes them miss out on moments that should be full of happiness.
In life, it is not difficult for us to find people who resemble gerbils.
They spend their days in fear and worry, as if the end of the world was near.
They are controlled by catastrophic thoughts and are unable to enjoy the good times of the moment.
Such people often live a very tired life, because they are always burdened with a heavy psychological burden and cannot move forward easily.
The Harvard Family Motto treasures a story from the days of World War II.
It tells the story of a gentleman named Jaime whose life is plagued by endless worries.
Whenever he thought of his son, who was far away in the army, an indescribable worry surged in his heart, for fear that he would not be able to return safely;
Whenever he thinks about the old house that is about to be demolished, he worries about whether the compensation he will receive will be enough to buy a new home;
The newly established business school made him even more worried, worried that he would not be able to recruit enough students to maintain the operation ......
Jaime's wife, seeing that her husband was losing weight because of his worries, advised him to write them down and seal them in a box.
A year later, Jaime stumbled through the dusty box and was surprised to find that none of the worries that had kept him awake at night had happened.
There is a saying in Positive Psychology:
Ninety percent of what humanity fears has never come true. ”
Life is like a tortuous river, full of unknown variables, and we cannot predict where the future train will go.
Too much worry will only leave us in endless pain.
Instead of thinking about the unattainable tomorrow, it is better to do the things in front of you in a down-to-earth manner.
As long as we have no worries in our hearts, our mood will naturally turn from cloudy to sunny.
Don't worry about what can't be changedOn the site of an old church in the Netherlands, there is an inscription like this:
This is the end of the matter, and nothing can be changed. ”
These few short words speak the true meaning of life.
On the road of life, there are always many unsatisfactory things.
Birth, old age, sickness and death, gathering and dispersing, these are the normal state of life, no matter how unwilling we are, we cannot change its established facts.
If we persist in resisting, we will only make a mess of our peaceful life, and even plunge ourselves into endless collapse.
However, if we learn to accept and break free from despair, then a better future will quietly come to us.
In the book, Carnegie shares the story of his friend Elizabeth, a woman who is deeply tormented by the death of her nephew in war.
Unable to accept reality, she immersed herself in grief all day long, allowing resentment to erode her heart, leading to the waste of work and the alienation of friendships.
She even planned to give up everything and end the rest of her life.
However, while tidying up her desk, she stumbles upon a letter written to her by her nephew.
In the letter, the nephew told her that no matter where he was, no matter how far apart, he would remember that she taught him to be a brave man, to be brave enough to accept whatever happened.
The letter was like a beam of light that shone into Elizabeth's heart.
She seemed to hear her nephew's call, telling her to hide her sadness behind her smile and live bravely.
So, she began to try to let go of her pain and resentment, devote herself to work, keep in touch with her nephew's comrades-in-arms, participate in ** educational courses, and find new pleasures.
Gradually, she no longer wastes her mind on things that cannot be changed, but welcomes each new day with a peaceful heart.
She accepted the arrangement of fate and reached a reconciliation with herself.
The Virtues of Human Nature wrote: "I do not force the moon that is out of reach, nor do I mourn the tears of the milk that has been spilled. ”
Life is like a play, full of unknowns and variables, and some things are destined to be beyond our control.
We may have tried our best, or we may have stayed awake at night, but the reality is always unmistakably in front of us, and there is no doubt about it.
However, a truly wise man knows how to accept everything that happens, whether it is happy or bad, and he is calm and calm.
They let go of their fear of impermanence and learned to reconcile with their fate and with themselves.
In such a state of mind, they were able to free themselves and live more calmly and freely.
Don't worry about the rights and wrongs of othersAdler once said: "Man's troubles often arise from excessive interference in the affairs of others." ”
This insight is profound and thought-provoking.
We are often tempted to intervene in mediation because we see disputes between others, but the result is often the opposite, and we are not human inside and out.
In the same way, when we hear other people's dissenting opinions, we can't help but intervene, which often leads to trouble.
Everyone has their own life trajectory, and their successes and failures need to be borne by themselves in the end.
When we care too much about other people's affairs, we often not only do not get their appreciation, but we may also get ourselves into endless troubles.
Some netizens shared a true story that resonated deeply with me.
That day, the netizen's father was on his way home from grocery shopping when he encountered two cars in a stalemate at a narrow intersection.
In the spirit of helping others, he plans to mediate, hoping that the two sides can be courteous to each other to resolve the dispute.
However, things didn't go as smoothly as he thought.
The owners of the two sides insisted on their own words, refused to give in to each other, and ignored his persuasion.
My father was angry for a while and began to reason with them, only to be abused by them.
My father was full of grievances, and when he returned home, he was depressed and fell ill.
The father, who was lying in the hospital bed, began to reflect on his actions.
Only then did he realize that the reason why he was in such a predicament was precisely because he cared too much about the rights and wrongs that had nothing to do with him.
His kindness became the target of others to vent their emotions, and finally made himself suffer unnecessary pain.
As the old saying goes, "Every man sweeps the snow in front of his own door, and does not care about the frost on the tiles of others." ”
This sentence profoundly expresses a kind of wisdom in life: focus on your own life and less interference in the affairs of others.
Everyone has their own stage and destiny, and we don't need to pay too much attention to the gains and losses of others.
In your spare time, you should calm down and examine your inner world, thinking about your situation and future.
Because it's only when we truly understand our needs that we can take a better grasp of our lives.
Sometimes, our kindness can become a burden to others.
Everyone's growth path is full of twists and turns, and they need to face and solve problems on their own.
Our intervention may upset their original balance and plunge them into a deeper predicament.
Therefore, respecting the choices of others and giving them enough space is also a kind of kindness and wisdom.
The philosopher Feng Youlan once gave this advice to those who "love to worry":
People will naturally go the right way, and you don't need to worry about it. When encountering problems, you will respond with your feelings, and this will respond to your feelings, which is usually right. ”
In this long journey of life, we will meet all kinds of people and experience all kinds of things.
If we are too concerned about everything, we are destined to drain our minds and plunge us into endless depression.
True wisdom lies in learning to go with the flow.
Let the past become the past, and no longer dwell on the time that has passed;
Let the future come naturally, and no longer worry about the unknown tomorrow.
When our hearts are free of obstacles, we are no longer entangled by distracting trivial matters.
We can enjoy every moment of life with a happy heart and embrace every beauty of the rest of our lives.
Therefore, let's learn to let go of excessive worries and face the ups and downs of life with a peaceful mind.
Only in this way can we truly live our lives and live wonderfully.
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