1And an old man went to see a doctor, and the doctor prescribed him a pair of medicines, and said unto him:"The effect of the drug is twelve hours".
The old man nodded and walked away with a smile, and the old man laughed as he walked, and when he got home, he kept laughing and laughing.
The family asked strangely, "What's the matter with you?"The old man said, "What kind of medicine is this doctor prescribes, I have to laugh for twelve hours, and I am almost tired of laughing!"”
On the way, I met a high school classmate who I hadn't seen for many years and asked him what he had been doing in the past few years and what he was studying in collegeHe said, "I haven't done anything in the past few years, I can eat and wear, and I have studied law for a few years." I exclaimed, "Yes!".Jurisprudence is not easy!He nodded and pondered for a moment and said, "It's a bit difficult, but now I've learned to do a few simple rituals......."”
3 My mother gave me a decree, from now on the salary will be in her hands, unless when I can find a girlfriend, and then let my girlfriend take over, I said then I don't look for a girlfriend, my dad flew over with a slipper......Get out!
4 I went out to buy breakfast this morning, and I heard someone say that I was black, so I went home and asked my wife, am I really that dark?Wife: "It's hard to say, I can only say that God wants to give you a pair of beautiful black eyes, and accidentally pressed all!."”
5 and my brother went to the beach to swim, my brother is backswimming, very comfortable!My brother laughed wildly on the shore and said that he had just heard three girls pointing at me and discussing, was that person drowning, his belly was so big, and he was floating?!
6 Recently, I just learned to cook, and my husband happened to have a friend, so I had to show my hand. Because it was the first time to cook for outsiders, I was nervous, and I tried it for a while, whether it would be too light, and then I tasted whether it would be too salty, and then I tasted the dish and it was gone. I embarrassed and shouted to my husband: "You go out to eat, I won't go." ”
7 On my way to work today, I saw a very beautiful little girl, and I followed her, and she seemed to notice that I was following her, so she trotted two steps. I thought to myself, if I don't grasp this fate, I may regret it for the rest of my life, so I chased after it and said, "Beauty, can you give me your **?".With trembling hands, she shoved her phone into my hand and ran away in a panic.
8 I accidentally touched a girl's face with a briefcase on the bus, and I quickly said to her that I was embarrassed, but the girl shouted: "You pay attention to me, I eat with my face, and if you scratch my face, you can't afford to pay for it."
I answered: "I also eat with my face, give face, don't care." The girl actually looked at me with a surprised face, including many people next to me who looked at me with suspicious eyes......I quickly explained: "I rely on shamelessness."
9. The female classmate who had just obtained her driver's license was stopped by the traffic police for illegal driving some time ago, and the traffic police asked her for a driver's license at that time. As a result, the female classmate said, "I didn't bring it." ”
The traffic police asked in disbelief: "How can you drive out without a driver's license, do you have it?"”
The female classmate replied cutely: "People finally got the test, so if you lose it, bring it out." ”
Traffic police ......Think about life!
10 This morning, the leader came to inspect the work. When he came to work, he suddenly asked me, "What is the first article of the company system?"‘’
I replied aloud: "Dress neatly and smile all the time......
Leader: "Then don't hurry up and zip up your pants!''"’
11 Say I love you, different reactions of women of all ages!
A group of men are drinking, and someone has a whim, and they meet to send a text message to their wives, writing "I love you", to see how women of all ages react, but the results are very different!
The woman in her 20s replied, "I love you too!".”
The woman in her 30s replied, "Did you drink too much?"”
The woman in her 40s replied, "You're not sick, are you?"”
The woman in her 50s replied, "Did you send it to the wrong person?"Let's see how I clean you up!”
The woman in her 60s replied, "Retired and idle, isn't it?"Let's get some exercise!”
The woman in her 70s didn't reply, and directly called her son**, "Your dad may not be in a few days, hurry up and prepare for the future!."”
The woman in her 80s said to herself, "Alas, I must have forgotten to take Alzheimer's medicine today!".”