1 I suspected that my husband had another woman outside, and my husband said that I was okay to find trouble, so we had a big fight, and I went back to my parents' house in a fit of anger. As soon as I arrived on the front foot, he followed on the back foot, so anxious that I was sweating profusely, I was secretly proud in my heart, I knew that he would come to pick me up, and he still cared about me. When my husband saw me, I said, "I saw that you didn't bring a change of clothes, so I brought them to you, you can dissipate your anger and go home in a few days!".”
2. Shopping with ***, passers-by have praised the two of us for being a good match. ** smiled and asked me: "Brother-in-law, do others praise me so much when you come out with my sister?"I said, "No, they all say I'm so blessed to marry a daughter-in-law who is more than a decade younger than me!"*'s face darkened all of a sudden.
3. When I was buying something and paying for it, I accidentally dropped five yuan on the ground, and I was about to pick it up, when a five or six-year-old child rushed over to pick it up and ran, saying as he ran, "I'm going to hand it over to the policeman's uncle." ”
I stood there for a while and said, "Little friend, give it to my uncle, who is in plain clothes." ”
4. In a company's payslip, it is common to have a caption that reads: "Your salary is your private matter, please do not disclose it to others." One new employee signed his pay stub with the following words: "I'm not going to mention it to anyone, I'm ashamed like you." ”
5When I was working in a garment factory, I had a good impression of each other with a girl.
Suddenly, one day the girl said that she had resigned, and the resignation letter had been submitted.
I told my sister that I would accompany you, and I would go if you went**, and then I decisively submitted my resignation.
As a result, hers is not accurate, but mine is accurate.
6 I had a girlfriend in high school, and she said that if I wanted to play with her, I would go downstairs to her house and learn how to cry pigs, and she would come down when she heard it. I said that learning to bark a pig is too ugly, can you learn to bark a cat?She said no. At that time, I thought she was joking and deliberately embarrassing me. Later, I learned that there were people who learned cats, dogs, and cuckoos.
7My friend and I went to the flower shop to buy flowers, and when we saw a pot of mimosa, we poked it with our hands and found that it was not moving, so I asked the boss what was the matter.
The boss said calmly: "Maybe this tree has a thicker skin......."”
8The first time I went to his house with my boyfriend, I just saw his mother, I hurriedly said hello: "Hello Auntie" His mother took my hand and said kindly: "What is your name Auntie, call Mom." I shyly called out, "Mom." His mother said happily: "Hey, I will recognize you as a daughter, and I will have the opportunity to introduce you to a better partner in the future." ”。Then, we were divided!
9 At night, I said to my wife: "Wife, the 20 yuan of pocket money I gave last week was used up, and I didn't want to buy a pack of cigarettes at a friend's party this week." ”
Wife: "Wait until the day of your party." ”
At this time, the son said, "Mom, the school asked me to pay 200 yuan for the materials." ”
The wife gave it to her son without saying a word, and the wife went to take a bath.
My son stuffed the money into me and said, "Dad, I lent it to you, and when I grow up and get married, you must help me!"”
10 I worked overtime last night, and it was almost zero o'clock when I came out of the company, and it was raining heavily, so I couldn't call a car, and I didn't bring an umbrella. So I sent a message to my dad: "Dad, it's raining heavily outside, I don't have an umbrella, can you come and pick me up?"I couldn't stop the car. My dad replied, "No, I'm already asleep." ”
In less than two minutes, I saw my dad post in the circle of friends: "Children without umbrellas must learn to run".
11 The city routine is deep, I want to go back to the countryside!
Next door, Lao Wang made an appointment with a sister on the Internet, and chatted for a few days. Suddenly asked Lao Wang to go to her house, Lao Wang said what to do if your husband came back suddenly, she said it's okay, generally won't come back suddenly, in case you want to come back, you say that you are hired by me to clean the glass, it's almost the New Year, and my husband won't doubt it. As a result, after staying at her house for a few minutes, her husband came back and wiped the glass all afternoon in order to pretend to be realistic.
On the way home, the more Wang thought about it, the more wrong it became...I'm going to be fooled!The city routine is deep, I want to go back to the countryside!