At the graduate level, getting along with your supervisor is seen as a delicate technical task. Our mentors are not only our academic partners, but also our elders and teachers, who have provided us with a lot of academic and life help. However, private interactions need to be handled with caution to ensure that professional relationships are maintained while maintaining an appropriate sense of proportion and distance.
Recently, a large number of graduate students have said that their relationship with their supervisors may be a little ambiguous, because some hints can be seen from some of the supervisor's words. However, when these chat records were posted, it was found that this was just the result of over-interpretation by graduate students, which made people wonder what is the mental state of graduate students now?This over-interpretation is also known as "over-understanding".
Suppose the instructor sends four words"I've been there"。If you don't connect the context, this sentence seems to be said by the male protagonist in ** to the female protagonist. However, this is your teacher. Originally, the teacher wanted to express that if the first draft of the student was written at the end of the week and he wanted to ask for advice and guidance, the teacher would always wait in the office. These four short words almost ruined the innocent mentor's reputation, which made people cry and laugh. Of course, this is understandable that graduate students are under a lot of pressure to study and work, and they appropriately use jokes to relieve this pressure.
1. The teacher's concern is misinterpreted as ambiguous
Some graduate supervisors express their concern for their students during chats, but they are misunderstood by students as ambiguous. For example, the tutor asks the student if he is okay when he hears that he has a coldThe children were touched by the care of the tutor and thought that the tutor really cared about their physical condition and wanted to say thank you. However, the instructor then said, "I'm afraid that you will infect everyone, so you won't use it", and the student's smile immediately froze. Such a misunderstanding makes people sigh that it is really not easy to be a tutor, not only to have academic strength but also to pay attention to everyday words, otherwise it is really easy to be misunderstood.
2. Ordinary words are misinterpreted as unusual innuendos
Sometimes, graduate students misinterpret ordinary words into unusual hints, further increasing the likelihood of misunderstanding. For example, the tutor only points out the student's shortcomings, but the student sees it as the tutor's criticism of him/her, creating unnecessary tension. The tutor may just want to tease the student with the word "stupid", and there is no malicious intent, but when it is screenshotted alone, it makes people feel that the atmosphere is a little weird.
3. Daily communication is amplified into ambiguous behavior
Sometimes, an ordinary sentence in daily communication can also be amplified into ambiguous behavior, further aggravating the misunderstanding. For example, a graduate student said that the supervisor patted something on his own and asked, "Can I eat it?"In fact, this is just a very ordinary way of expression, but it has been exaggerated and interpreted by graduate students, which makes people feel that the atmosphere of this scene is not quite right.
1. A sense of proportion
When dealing with mentors, pay attention to your sense of proportion. We should respect the status of the mentor and use respectful addresses such as "teacher", "you". Use polite language and show sincerity and gentleness in your communication. Avoid being too low-key or arrogant, and maintain a sincere, generous, humble and gentle image. Demonstrate an attitude towards academic knowledge and learning.
2. Comfort
In communication with the instructor, it is important to reflect a sense of comfort and security. Comfort is reflected in the proportions of what we say, on the premise of respecting the teacher, and avoiding the use of expressions with low emotional intelligence. Ask questions from your mentor, respect your advisor's opinions, and show sincerity and gentleness.
3. A sense of security
The way to feel safe is to be responsive to everything. Whether it's when completing a task or encountering a problem, report it to the mentor in a timely manner and demonstrate a proactive effort to solve the problem. By responding to the assignments of our mentors in a timely manner, we demonstrate our honesty and responsibility. When you encounter a problem that cannot be solved, you should ask the tutor for advice and report the progress in time.
Relationships with mentors require us to maintain a sense of proportion and distance. Over-reading the words of the guru often leads to misunderstandings, so we need to be more rational about the words and actions of the guru. In communication, express your opinions and needs in a respectful and polite manner, and show sincerity and eagerness to learn. At the same time, maintain a sense of security, always report and ask questions to your mentor, and show your honesty and responsibility. Relationships with mentors require us to be mindful of our sense of proportion, comfort, and security, and to avoid misunderstandings that can lead to over-interpretation. Only by maintaining a good professional relationship in cooperation with our supervisors can we better develop our academic abilities and conduct academic research.