1Me: Mom, I won't be in danger of going to the hotel to apply for the front desk, I heard that many hotels have irregular services.
Mom: Don't worry, no, there is a light at the front desk, you can see your appearance clearly. And if you are willing to hire someone like you, it is estimated that there are no requirements for appearance, and it must be very formal.
2. My friend often travels on business, and once he was afraid of falling asleep before taking the car, so he poured tea with a mineral water bottle and took it, and suddenly braked during the car, and his bottle of tea flew out and rolled in the aisle.
Many people are looking at this bottle, because the liquid inside is yellow and foamy, my friend is extremely embarrassed, and I don't want people to misunderstand, so I picked it up and drank a few sips, leaving the frightened eyes of others!
3 My sister's child was just one year old and five months old, once I asked him if you love your mother or your aunt, she replied that she loved her aunt, she loved her grandmother or her aunt, she also said she loved her aunt, and after asking a circle, she said that she loved her aunt, beautiful me, but later my sister asked her, do you love your aunt or love your mother, but she said she loves her mother, and later I learned that she would only answer the last name she heard, I was really speechless.
4. My sister is thirty years old and still single, and today she just came home and her mother started nagging again.
My sister muttered impatiently: "Mom, how many times have I said it, I spend money lavishly, I don't marry if I don't have money, I can't hurt people!."”
I couldn't listen anymore: "If you can't get married, you can get rid of a money worshipper!."”
When my mother heard this, she turned to me and yelled, "Shut up, you poor boy, who is qualified to make fun of a person who fights for his ideals!".”
5 A few years ago, I went to play with a friend in Qixia, Yantai, and saw a lotus leaf on the edge of the ground, the key is not in the water, but in the dry land, I blurted out: Why is there no water in this lotus?My friend also blurted out: Dear, this is taro!
6Every time I put my arms around my dad's neck and was coquettish, trying to cheat two dollars to spend, my mother would point at me and say, stay away from your dad!
7I just saw a couple on the bus, the woman called the man a miserable, I cast a contemptuous look at the man, who knew that the woman saw it, and actually yelled at me: "Look at it!".I'll hit you again!"I was so grumpy, I wasn't happy at the time. To be honest, if it weren't for the severe shaking of my legs, I would have really had a fight with her!
8 Two days ago, my father suddenly woke up in the middle of the night and found that my mother didn't snore, usually very loud, and after waiting for a while, I still didn't, I suddenly felt a chill down my spine, and I chuckled in my heart, and called my mother's name at the top of my voice, and my mother was woken up and said:"What are you shouting, you think I'm dead. "After saying that, go back to sleep.
9 As soon as I entered the elevator, a lady followed me with a big and strong Demu. The dog has a lot of strength, and the lady holds the leash with both hands very hard and does not dare to let go. I said gentlemanly, "Hello, what floor are you on?"Would you like me to press it for you?The lady said, "15th floor, thank you." I nodded, pushed the dog to the ground with all my might, and said to the lady, "Quick, I'll hold it, you can press the 15th floor!."”
10 A group of men are drinking, and someone has a whim, and they meet to send a text message to their wives, writing "I love you", to see how women of all ages react, but the result is very different!
The woman in her 20s replied, "I love you too!".”
The woman in her 30s replied, "Did you drink too much?"”
The woman in her 40s replied, "You're not sick, are you?"”
The woman in her 50s replied, "Did you send it to the wrong person?"Let's see how I clean you up!”
The woman in her 60s replied, "Retired and idle, isn't it?"Let's get some exercise!”
The woman in her 70s didn't reply, and directly called her son**, "Your dad may not be in a few days, hurry up and prepare for the future!."”
The woman in her 80s said to herself, "Alas, I must have forgotten to take Alzheimer's medicine today!".”
11Is it true that the daughter is the lover of her father's last life?
My daughter came to me and asked: Is it true that my mother said that my daughter was my father's lover in my last life?
I said, "Yes."You're Dad's baby lover in his last life!
Daughter: Liar, you are so ugly, how could I have taken a fancy to you in my last life!