Hello, I'm Xiaodan
Leo Tolstoy wrote:"Only love can make marriage sacred, and only a marriage that makes love sacred is a true marriage. ”
For many people, marriage is a way to pursue happiness. Having a warm family, a caring partner, tends to bring happiness and satisfaction.
It's a pity that the relationship between men and women is always complicated and tortuous, which makes many marriages cold and desperate. If you want to have a stable marital relationship, you need a healthy way of getting along, and you need to take responsibility.
A marriage that does not take responsibility is full of complaints
Xiaoxuan and her husband Li Wei, I don't know when they started to have no feelings.
Maybe it was because after the child was born, Li Wei disliked her milk-stained home clothes, her unkempt appearance all day long, and the messy living room after returning home, or maybe it was because the child slept in separate beds on the day ......
Traditionally, men are seen as the breadwinners of the family, while women are seen as the main caregivers of the family. Li Wei, who was deeply affected by this concept, believed that he did not need to participate in the care of the children, but only needed to give money.
He often used the excuse that he was busy with work and pushed all the tasks of taking care of the children to Xiaoxuan, becoming a real "hands-off shopkeeper".
As Xiaoxuan's emotional focus gradually shifts, the relationship between the two becomes more and more strained, often arguing over the care of the children and housework, and lacking understanding and communication between each other.
Li Wei thinks that Xiaoxuan has become too critical and demanding, while Xiaoxuan thinks that Li Wei lacks a sense of family responsibility and care.
"Obligation is the foundation of a happy and lasting marriage. ”—Florence IsaacsIf the partner does not know how to take on the responsibilities of the family, the marriage will be full of complaints.
The lack of marital responsibility is the main cause of tension in their relationship. When in a marital relationship, there is not a commitment but too much taking, no matter how one party gives, the other party will always be dissatisfied, such a mode of getting along is pathological, and it is easy to hurt each other's feelings.
Someone who understands your behavior will take on family responsibilities
The people who truly love you are often the ones who can understand what you are thinking and feeling.
Tingting is free by nature, does not like the traditional cumbersome rituals, every New Year's holiday, always does not buy gifts to visit the elderly on both sides, this kind of etiquette things, naturally fall on the husband. This made her husband feel a little uncomfortable, and he always nagged her.
But when the nagging is over, the husband happily goes to give gifts.
He knows that no one is perfect. In the wife's cognition, real care does not need more cumbersome rituals, but more importantly, she cares more about the elderly in daily life and gives them practical things.
Although the wife does not pay attention to the expression of festivals, she is using practical actions to express her love and concern for the elderly.
A stable marriage relationship is not about two people with perfect marks together, but about being willing to understand different ideas, see and understand each other's behavior, and silently supplement and protect their partners where the other party is not perfect.
When two people are willing to take responsibility, grievances in the marital relationship can be easily resolved.
Marriage is a long-term commitment, and taking responsibility is essential for the marital relationship, and facing the joys and sorrows of life together can build a deep trusting relationship, which is the cornerstone of the stability of the marital relationship.
A stable marital relationship will not be delivered by God, but requires a healthy mode of getting along.
Taking responsibility is a healthy way to get along with each other and deepen the emotional bond between each other. Providing an environment for both parties to support each other and grow together is a kind of happiness and satisfaction for the partner.
I am Xiao Dan, who has been an emotional counselor for three years, has trained 90+ emotional listeners, and received visits for 200 hours. Now he is a professional writing therapy sharer, providing reliable emotional counseling and writing therapy services. If you are also emotionally confused, welcome to talk to me about the list of high-quality authors