When you reach middle age, if you have single parents, please do these three filial things

Mondo Social Updated on 2024-03-02

When a person reaches middle age, the house is full of people who rely on him, but there is no one he can rely on.

If you think about it carefully, we are not helpless, but we have less financial dependence and no less spiritual dependence.

Mencius said, "Only filial piety to one's parents can relieve one's worries." ”

Take good care of your parents, you will leave infinite concern, no matter how far you go, you can find your way home, and a light in your hometown will be lit for you.

However, parents grow old, and one of them will always go first. There are also some parents who divorced when they were middle-aged, and they have not remarried since then, and they have been dependent on their children for their lives.

Elderly parents rely on each other, and their children are relieved to go to the **. But single parents are a hurdle in the hearts of their children, and filial piety is also a problem.

Today, I will talk to you about how to be filial to single parents. Here are three things you can do well.

First, learn to communicate with your parents and respect their retirement plans.

In the TV series "Thirty Only", Gu Jia's father lost his partner many years ago. Father and daughter have survived a hard life together.

After Gu Jia got married, her father lived alone. One day, Gu Jia dreamed that her father was sick and there was no one to take care of her, so she decisively decided to take her father to live at home.

The father refused, and offered the idea of going to a nursing home. He said: "You must not cause trouble for your daughter. ”

There is a way to pity the hearts of parents all over the world.

All parents want their children to do well. And when the children are happy, they stand silently aside, watching. If you become a burden to your children because you are old, you will feel very uncomfortable in your heart.

How to convince parents? How are parents arranged? How to make parents happy? The key is to "communicate well", don't look at your parents with a blush, and don't arrange what your parents do with wishful thinking.

You can often think like this: What is the state of mind of an old man walking alone, looking at the streets where people come and go, or facing the mountains and villages alone, but unwilling to tell his children about his inner suffering?

It's not unlove, it's impatience. Middle-aged people are difficult to manage even their own small family, and they are also very irritable at work, and they don't have much patience to take care of their parents, so communication becomes concise and even rude.

Lawyer Holmes once said, "Speaking is like playing a harp: you need to pluck the strings to play the **, and you need to hold the strings with your hands to keep them from making a sound." ”

When communicating with parents, you must fully express yourself, and you must learn to listen. After understanding the wishes of the parents, speak their own opinions and try to accommodate the wishes of the parents as much as possible.

There is nothing wrong with accompanying children to travel far away, spend time in their hometown, parents and siblings to care for the elderly, in nursing homes, etc., and when parents need to change the way they care for the elderly, they should make timely adjustments, instead of complaining and blaming.

Second, do not blindly oppose twilight love, and do not quietly protect your family, family property, and uphold justice.

When it comes to twilight love, many children will object. Because in the family, an irrelevant person suddenly appears, and you have to be called "uncle and aunt".

If the "uncle and aunt" still have children who are not adults, you will be even more uncomfortable. In addition, it is not impossible to prevent the elderly who are greedy for money.

In fact, parents who have been single for a long time, they want to have a wife, but it is difficult to talk about it, or if they have a relationship, they will hide it from their children and are afraid of being opposed.

In the TV series "North and South", Mr. Bai and Dr. Lu are an elderly couple. They go dancing together and make dumplings together for the New Year.

When they counseled with their children, they were enlightened and agreed.

In the end, because of the death of Mr. Bai, he did not enter the palace of marriage, but in the last years of his life, he left a true love and walked less lonely.

As you can imagine, middle-aged people will find ways to accompany their parents for the holidays, but there is no guarantee that all the holidays will be able to rush to the parents' house. Especially those who travel from south to north, the distance from their hometown is very long.

How disappointed was an old man, waiting for an empty house, looking at the door several times, but not seeing his children come home? The cooked dumplings are cold, hot, and finally cold, who can know the sadness behind them?

In fact, many people, when they pick up the household registration book, when they see the words "divorced and widowed", they will "chuckle" in their hearts, and they are uncomfortable, but they try their best to cover it up in front of their children.

As children, be good at reading words and feelings. It is necessary to know about the relationship between single parents in line with the principle of protecting family wealth, but not to interfere with it.

Give the old man the right to fall in love, and the children will suffer a certain amount of grievances, but they will be happy after all.

Third, work hard, repay parents with excellent results, and create better conditions for parents to provide for the elderly.

Think about it, what is the greatest wish of a parent? It's not that you eat and drink well, but that your children have a chance.

Some single-parent families, on the surface, lack father's or mother's love, but in fact, love is more precious. It is touching that single parents do their best to bring up their children.

Yuan Lifan, a thinker of the Ming Dynasty, died when he was very young. Her mother, Lee, took care of five children on her own, two of whom were not biological.

Yuan's Family Motto records that Li waited for the children to fall asleep every day, and she got up before the children got up. Day and night, weaving and sewing, and taking care of the land at home.

Later, the five children were very competitive, some studied medicine, some farmed, and some became officials.

I often hear the saying, "When you grow up, I will be blessed." ”

However, if the children are not angry, what about the blessings of the parents? No, the family is starving, and they have to say "so happy" happily.

Your parents send you to school, find a job for you, and help you start a business, which is basically expecting you to have achievements and make everyone feel relieved.

When people reach middle age, filial piety is put on their lips, they must be integrated into the sweat, and they must give their parents the capital of pride. Perhaps, if they can show off for you, they will be happy.

I have heard such a sentence: "Middle-aged and elderly people should enjoy their old age, they should eat, drink, and don't put anything in their hearts."

Everyone has different experiences and different opportunities。In fact, how can you not have a heart? It's just that it's hard to find a "confidant" who can't say it.

Because the parents are single, the children receive double the love that one person gives; Because the parents are single, the children need to redouble their love.

Reality tells us that filial piety should be realistic, not only to provide for parents' meals, but also to take care of parents' feelings and spirit.

The ancients said: "Filial piety is flowing water, the previous generation intercepts the flow, and the next generation dries up." ”

From now on, love will spring up from generation to generation.

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