People, do you want to be gregarious or not?
There is no standard answer, after all, everyone's way of life is different, and their perception of the outside world is also different.
"The Courage to Be Hated" says: "It's not that we're limited and can't do it——— but our own choice, it's our choice not to do." ”The choice of who you are with is always yours.
When we were young, we had to deal with people for a few taels of silver, and we had to give a smile to those we hated. When we are old and have withdrawn from the workplace, we don't have to worry about money, we should completely put the choice in our own hands.
Whatever you choose to socialize, it's what you want for the rest of your life.
The people who consume you, need to stay away.
The more a person lives, the more uncomfortable it becomes, first, there is internal friction, and he can't figure it out; The second is that there is external friction, and someone is torturing you.
My neighbor Lao Fei, after retiring, often went to square dance.
Lao Fei is not tall, and he is not fat, so he stands in a group of aunts and is very coordinated.
But Lao Fei has stopped square dancing since the end of last year. It turned out that some aunts disliked Lao Fei and said that he was "neither male nor female".
Lao Fei found a few old colleagues and went fishing together.
He was a newcomer and didn't know how to fish, so he returned empty-handed for several days on end. His wife blamed him for spending money indiscriminately, and his colleagues laughed at him for being "unskilled".
As soon as the fishing rod is lost, the old fee will be decadent.
It can be seen that no matter what Lao Fei does, he is bored with himself. Those who consume him have three characteristics: picky, sarcastic, and all kinds of incomprehension and intolerance.
In many martial arts films, we will hear such a sentence "vitality is greatly damaged". When you experience a "great injury to your vitality", your life will either be nirvana or collapse. As an old man, it should be the latter who is more likely.
Old people really don't want to be gregarious for the sake of being gregarious. Even if you like something, you can do it alone, don't call friends.
The machine is consumed and needs to be replaced with parts, which is not too difficult. When a person's spirit is consumed, he needs to be self-reliant and self-reliant, forcing himself to live like spring.
Stay away from the people who consume you, and have the courage to be hated, and life will be free.
The people who nourish you are precious.
Writer Mo Yan, why did he succeed?
He admits that most of his early works are based on personal experienceThe experiences of neighbors, relatives and friends, and some of the stories told by the elderly, are some of the most original and valuable materials.
For example, when he was describing his childhood, he wrote about the neighbor's aunt and did not hesitate to borrow a bowl of rice from his family. Later, my mother returned a bowl of rice that had been piled up.
A detail made Mo Yan learn the truth of being a man and see the brilliance of human nature.
When people are old, you don't want to start a business and get rich, but you have to maintain your spirit and let yourself live younger. This is the desire to "nourish".
If you want to socialize, the following kinds of people are more reliable.
First, walk with people of light and nourish your heart.
With the help of other people's light, not only will you not get lost, but you will also see the scenery.
Pu Songling, who has spent most of his life in the examination room, has not seen hope in his seventies.
On the way to study, he dealt with ordinary people and collected a lot of folk tales. Therefore, he wrote "Strange Tales from the Past". When he was very old, he found that it was the people who made him successful. It is the fame and hope they bring.
Wang Guozhen wrote in the article: "As long as spring is still there, I will not be sad;Even though the night swallows everything, the sun can come back. ”When people get old, they will inevitably have back pain and get sick, but you can't be pessimistic. Cherish those who encourage you and take you to see the sun. The mood has improved, and all the sickness is a floating cloud;Age can also be forgotten.
Second, get along with people of the same frequency and be comfortable.
Lin Huiyin said: "Only people with the same heart can resonate to see the ebb and flow of the world;Only people with similar souls can see the beauty hidden in each other's hearts. ”
We often feel that it is difficult to find a confidant. Workers will intrigue, and relatives and friends will calculate each other. When people are old, who else can understand themselves?People who are very utilitarian have basically left.
Actually, let's not worry. The so-called same frequency is not that several people have been on the same channel, but that at a certain time period, everyone understands and encourages each other.
Let's say an elderly person is always coughing, and the people around him feel very irritable. But when he goes to the clinic, he meets someone with the same symptom, and the two of them can talk about how to stay away from coughing. Some methods can be shared, and some pits can be reminded of each other.
A person with similar characteristics and a person who encounters a certain difficulty is worth approaching, and a circle of positive energy can be formed.
Third, be with the people who love you, and be pleasant.
Someone who loves you, has been helping you, and expects you to get better. Maybe he can't speak and makes you uncomfortable, but "love" can't be discarded.
Many couples have been noisy for a lifetime, but they have also loved for a lifetime. Quarrels are also a way to be happy. Your own family and love each other is the confidence to support the elderly.
Nourishing each other is the self-discipline that the elderly should have.
To be nourished by others, don't take it for granted, and learn to give back.
Any emotion goes both ways. The same goes for nourishment.
The flowers and plants in the home, which are often watered and fertilized, are therefore rewarded with flowers and fragrances, which are examples of mutual nourishment.
My mother used to say, "If you're poor, at least remember the names of the people who help you." ”
In ordinary life, you remember each other's names, and when you meet again, take the initiative to say hello; Say "thank you" to the person who helped; To his family, he often says "hard work"; Passing on love to the community. They are all the embodiment of mutual nourishment.
People respect me, I respect people, and this way of life will never go out of style.
Don't let the person who nourishes you chill, otherwise you won't meet it next time.
If a person is like a rainbow, he knows it when he meets it.
For the rest of your life, invite those who nourish you into your life, and kick out those who consume you.
Being gregarious or not being gregarious cannot become a forced fate, but learning to choose.
When people are old, they may lose their strength in their arms, but the power of the heart is infinite.
Don't let yourself be an empty shell waiting to grow old.