Introduction: A child has not been expected by his parents since he was born, and has been ignored and neglected by his parents since he was a child, and his life is full of ups and downs and setbacks. Only children who grow up in a loving environment can face life more calmly, more confidently, and more confidently in the future. Parents' care, understanding and respect for their children is an important prerequisite for their healthy growth. Tong Duoduo is an ill-fated child, she behaves frivolously and rebelliously, but in her life, all she really needs is the deep care and love of her parents.
Tong Duoduo is the third in the family, she is the youngest daughter of Wen Li and Tong Zhi, and she is also the least expected child. Wen Li has always longed for a boy, but unexpectedly has a girl. When Duoduo was born, due to the family's financial difficulties, Wen Li originally planned to pass it on to her eldest sister. But later, Tong Zhi lied about Duoduo's age when applying for a household registration, and deceived her into obtaining a special food stamp for the national urban household registration, which is also the reason why Wen Li decided to keep Duoduo.
Duoduo has spent his childhood in the neglect of his parents and the aura of Dabao, and has experienced endless pain and suffering. The eldest sister Yanni and her younger brother Dabao are deeply loved by their parents, while the second sister Nanfang is cared for by her grandmother, and she is the only one who grows up in the predicament.
Even though Duoduo's parents never provided her with food and clothing, they never really cared for her spiritually. She has been a clean-loving child since she was a child. When Duoduo was a child, her parents didn't care much about her, and even when she was studying Xi and exams, her parents cared little about her. Duoduo lacks love in the family, so he can only look for it outside. She mingled with some bad people and eventually got pregnant.
Eventually, it was because she felt insecure and empty that she desperately wanted to find a new home and home for herself. However, she didn't expect that those bad people were irresponsible, which made Duoduo suffer.
In the year of the Duoduo high school entrance examination, Wen Li and Tong Zhi were in the turmoil of divorce. Duoduo returned home with tears in his eyes and asked Wen Li and Tong Zhi if they planned to divorce.
Wen Li tried to reassure her with a heavy heart, but Duoduo continued to ask: "Since you all know the importance of my high school entrance examination, why do you still file for divorce at the critical moment of my high school entrance examination?"”
Wen Li reluctantly tells Duoduo that she does not plan to divorce, but after receiving Wen Li's clear answer, Duoduo returns to school with both nervousness and joy.
Unfortunately, although Tong Zhi and Wen Li did not officially divorce, they still chose to separate. Duoduo stayed at home to take care of Tong Zhi's daily life, but due to the separation, Tong Zhi seemed absent-minded every day, often smoking and drinking, and caring relatively little about Duoduo.
Once, because Duoduo was pregnant, he had a fierce argument with her boyfriend in **. When she got home, Tong Zhi curiously asked her if she was looking for a boyfriend. Duoduo jokingly said with a confused expression: "During the ten days and half of your business trip, you always treated me as an adult, and when you came back from a business trip, you treated me as a child, I really don't know my current age." ”
Wen Li later found out that Duoduo was pregnant because she was unmarried, and the two had another quarrel in the conversation, Wen Li angrily asked: "What did I owe you in my previous life, are you here to seek revenge?"Seeing Wen Li's heartache on her face, although Duoduo verbally showed that he did not admit defeat, he was actually full of pain in his heart, but it was too long and heavy to backlog, so he didn't care.
As they grew older, Duoduo became more and more rebellious and willful, which often made Wen Li and Tong Zhi feel heartbroken and sad. Although Wen Li didn't care much about Duoduo before, seeing Duoduo doing nonsense every day, her heart became extremely heavy.
However, Wen Li and Tong Zhi often subjectively believe that Duoduo is willing to be depraved and rebellious and willful, but never consider who caused all this. Therefore, Wen Li kept asking questions, and Duoduo kept dodging, which made the estrangement between the two gradually deepen, becoming more and more difficult to approach.
Wouldn't it be nice if Duoduo could experience this kind of care sooner when he was a child?Her parents were insignificant in her life, but they left her with a shadow that can never be erased. When Duoduo was young, they needed the most care and care as parents, but when Duoduo grew up, they intervened in her daily life as parents, but at this moment Duoduo no longer has too many expectations.
When she was young, she was still full of energy to express her grievances and grievances to her parents. However, as the years go by, she has gradually adapted to such grievances, and she has become numb to the neglect of her parents, but her heart has become more and more closed.
However, constant avoidance is not the solution to the problem, and when faced with a dilemma from which there is no turning back, there is still a need to face inner trouble.
Wen Li later found something in the trash can, which shocked her, Wen Li's heart was like a knife, and she couldn't help but stop Duoduo, who was about to leave home, and planned to have a deep conversation with her.
Let's review this passage of dialogue that is considered a classic:
Toto: I've told you many times, please don't interfere with me!
Wen Li: How old are you, you dare to say such things that have no moral bottom line. Even if you had a lot of children when you were a child, your family was not financially well-off, and your parents didn't take good care of you enough, did your parents do anything to be sorry for you?Why don't you treat yourself like a man. Why are you so hostile to your parents?
Toto: Who are you to accuse me of being hostile to you?
Wen Li: From the way you look at you to the tone of your voice, you really hurt my feelings!
TOTO: Frankly, from the moment you got pregnant, you didn't want me anymore, and even the moment I was born, you didn't want me anymore. If it weren't for that month's food stamp, you would have given me to someone else, look at my name, Duoduo, it's redundant, right, Mom?
Wen Li said: "You let me finish speaking, and after you finish speaking, you will leave this house." You should never come to me. I will never have the opportunity to see you again. You'll never be able to talk to me again!You should never be in my sight.
Duoduo: I understand that you have never regarded me as your own daughter, I understand that you have always doted on Dabao and Yanni, but there is such a nasty guy as me, you always say that I make you angry, so how have you treated me since I was a child?What did I do to you?In your hearts, I was not even as good as trash, and at that time I was trying to learn Xi every day, hoping that you would pamper me as much as you dote on Dabao and Yanni, but when did you really care about me?
Wen Li said: Even if your mother is not good enough to you, you should not hurt yourself, and you should not use this way to retaliate against us!Did you know ?..
It was the first time in their lives that a mother and daughter were genuinely confronted with each other, and although they unleashed a long backlog of conflict, the feelings of hurting others and themselves were much deeper, and the most serious consequences could simply be the damage to both parties.
After hearing these words, Duoduo felt that staying at home was really boring, and originally planned to pick up her things and leave, but she didn't expect that as soon as she walked to the door, her stomach felt a sharp pain. In this emergency, she still had to compromise with her parents. Wen Li and Tong Zhi noticed this and quickly sent Duoduo to the hospital.
For Duoduo, it was the first time her parents accompanied her to the doctor, and it was also the first time she realized that she was also pampered by her parents. Through this hospitalization experience, Duoduo deeply felt the deep concern of her parents. Although she had previously built a heart for herself, she eventually reconciled with her parents and reconciled due to her parents' occasional care and care.
Actually, it's the nature of parents. Even if the child says a lot, they will not hold a grudge against the child. No matter how much resentment a child has towards their parents, they always turn to their parents first when they are in trouble. There is nothing between family affection that cannot be resolved, this is the nature of parents and children.
Analysis: Duoduo has lived in a lack of caring environment since childhood, but unfortunately, Wen Li and Tong Zhi never realized that in their hearts, as long as they do not let their children eat less and wear less, it is enough to meet their needs. But when children grow up and find out that their parents' thinking is wrong, they start complaining, thinking that their parents gave them all this.
In fact, in real life, many parents hold the same view, believing that as long as their child's basic life needs are met, it is enough. However, they often ignore the fact that the barrenness of the spiritual world is far more frightening than the barrenness of real life, and Duoduo is such a barren person in the spiritual world.
In a family of four children, it is the fault of the parents that they do not suffer from inequality, because the preference for any one child is the fault of the parents. Especially Wen Li and Tong Zhi, their degree of eccentricity is very serious. To make matters worse, many parents have a common trait, which is that it is difficult to admit their partiality, and they usually blame their children for their own shortcomings.
Duoduo is a child who is not pampered by her parents, she has grown up alone since she was a child, and she is not liked by anyone. Her parents are both working in other places and rarely return home, and she lives alone in this world like a left-behind child. Duoduo has experienced many miscarriages, all because of her rebelliousness and willfulness in her youth, which is not only a release of her own hurt and emotions, but also a dissatisfaction and accusation against her parents.
I have a strong interest in "Golden Wedding", and I have thought carefully about why Duoduo is so painful and caused her to miscarry many times. It is only now that I truly understand what Duoduo is experiencing, which is actually a straightforward and strong accusation against her family of origin.
First of all, because her parents were not involved in her upbringing, she was never able to effectively protect herself in this regard. Growing up, she encountered many difficulties and suffered many setbacks, but she never turned to her parents for help. Being hurt for a long time and reluctant to share it with their parents after the injury, they have to bear it alone.
Furthermore, the damage does not gradually decrease over time, but becomes more and more difficult to eliminate. Again, once the damage is revealed, it will leave you in deep pain from which you cannot extricate yourself and cannot be relieved, which will eventually lead to physical and mental destruction. Some people are calmer on the outside, but they are unusually hot on the inside, and if accidentally exposed, it can cause deep damage.
Again, the psychological barriers between parents and children that are difficult to resolve are largely due to the means of communication. In our opinion, there should be a relationship of trust between parents. Wen Li and Tong Zhi did not have time management when they were young, but as they grew older and their lives stabilized, they began to consider exercising their rights as parents. They often question and blame their child's behavior, claiming that the child has done something wrong, but rarely reflect on their own behavior.
In the end, the educational concept of this drama also sounded the alarm for all parents and children, excessive doting and lack of love may lead children to embark on a road of no return. In our society, many families are over-pampered and tragedy occurs. Dabao and Duoduo are the most outstanding representatives. They have been pampered by their parents since they were children, and when they grow up, they are pampered by their parents to death, and their upbringing experience is also full of pain and bitterness. One of them sacrificed his life, while the other gave half of his life.
Although Duoduo is not traditionally seen as a good woman, she is indeed a good girl full of tenacity, optimism, ease and frankness. Although she is the most daughter, she is the most valuable and considerate daughter.
When his parents were old, in order to rescue Dabao and reduce the burden on his parents, Duoduo silently took out the 80,000 yuan he had saved.
After the loss of Dabao, Tong Zhi was deeply grieved, but his sincere words made him regain his fighting spirit.
In addition, when Tong Zhi was reluctant to put on a suit, Wen Li was also persuaded by Duoduo to persuade him to give in with words full of sincerity and tears.
In the end, at the golden wedding party, I also kept the guarantee letter for my parents very carefully.
Duoduo is undoubtedly a young woman of extraordinary bearing and open-mindedness, and her care and filial piety to her parents, sometimes even surpassing that of Yanni and Nanfang, she is undoubtedly a good girl who deserves our deep respect.
In short, life is like a play, and drama is like life itself. Through the work "Golden Wedding", I deeply realized the biggest "evil" of being a parent, that is, being born without raising, raising without teaching. What is the time in our lives when we need our parents the most?In the first half of our lives, when we need our parents the most, they will leave willfully, but when we no longer have too many expectations, they will reappear as parents. As comical as it may seem, the deep relationship between parents and children always defuses all misunderstandings and hatreds.
I'm really glad that everything is still going on, that it's not too late, that the rest of my life is full of happiness and that I have a good husband. I think that Duoduo, who is full of innocence and longs for the care of her parents, has gone through countless difficulties and tribulations to finally fulfill her wish!