1A beautiful woman asked me, "Sister, I guess you have twenty-seven or eight, right?"”
Hehe, I'm in my thirties, do I look quite young?”
Well, the childish clothes you wear look young!”
2 In a teahouse in Fuzhou, an old gentleman was playing Go seriously, but every time he played chess, he forgot to put on his reading glasses. As a result, he accidentally made the wrong move, which led to his own trouble. His chess buddies couldn't help but laugh out loud and reminded him to put on his glasses. After putting on his glasses, the old gentleman saw the chessboard clearly and laughed along. The people around were amused by this warm and humorous scene.
3 A student offended someone, and when school was out at night, he was blocked in the playground by a group of people.
Although there are many people on the other side, this student has no fear!strode forward and shouted menacingly, "You dare to hit me?"Do you know who my second uncle is......”
Before he finished speaking, the kid was knocked down by everyone and kicked ...... in a circle
After kicking, this kid was still there humming and chirping: "It's useless for you to beat me, my second uncle ......."”
What did your second uncle do?”
My second uncle is a doctor, and if you beat me like this, I don't spend money to see a doctor.
4I remember breaking up with my ex-girlfriend when I was in college, she retaliated against me and said that I was gay, and then it spread very bloody, and the three roommates in the same dormitory, both of them moved off-campus, and only one roommate insisted on accompanying me, and then I also moved off-campus. I'll go. I'm messing with someone!
5A drunkard was drinking in the hotel when he suddenly saw a man carrying a duck towards the kitchen.
The drunken man asked, "What are you doing with that pig?"”
The man scoffed, "It's not a pig, it's a duck!".”
The drunk said angrily, "Don't interject!".I'm talking to ducks. ”
6 sister's boyfriend is Japanese, yesterday my sister took her boyfriend home for dinner, the whole family on my sister can speak Japanese, as a result of the food when my sister has something to go out, my family tradition is that the guests do not move we can't move, as a result of my sister's boyfriend has not moved, my dad was hungry and couldn't stand it and said "Taijun, Missy-Mixi!".”
7And an old man went to see a doctor, and the doctor prescribed him a pair of medicines, and said unto him:"The effect of the drug is twelve hours". The old man nodded and walked away with a smile, and the old man laughed as he walked, and when he got home, he kept laughing and laughing. The old man said, "What kind of medicine did this doctor prescribe, I have to laugh for 12 hours, and I am almost tired of laughing."
8. After my parents knew that I had talked about my boyfriend, they kept urging me to take him home for dinner. As a result, before the day arrived, my parents didn't know why they quarreled, and the more noisy they became, the more fierce they became, and it was not easy for anyone to persuade them. When my boyfriend came over, he ate with his head down, and his parents didn't care about him even if they quarreled. After a meal, my mother suddenly asked me: Hey, I had a quarrel with your father, who was the young man who just sat here to eat?
9 dad just called** anxiously asked, "Are you okay?".”
I said, "That's good!."What's wrong?”
He said: "I received a text message saying that you have been kidnapped, and I want to call him 200,000 within 3 days, or tear up the ticket!."”
I hurriedly comforted my father: "Don't worry, I'm fine, that's a **!."When did you receive the text message?”
He hesitated for a moment and said, "Last month, as soon as I got busy, I forgot about it......”
10 Once I went shopping for clothes, I saw an electronic scale at the door as soon as I arrived at the store, and recently I just wanted to measure my weight, so I didn't hesitate to stand up, but I couldn't see my weight.
I asked my boss, "Is your electronic scale broken, why is there no reading?"”
When the boss heard this, he shouted: "You hurry up and get me down, that's our sweeping robot."
11 Our daughter's brain is not good, let's have another one.
When I was in the second grade of elementary school, I wanted to hug my mother. My mom said, "No, unless you eat the chicken manure on the ground." I immediately picked it up and stuffed it in my mouth. My mom was so frightened that she slapped it off and carried me home .........I've been proud of this for a long time, and you see my mother can't screw me ......And I don't know, my mother discussed with my father on many nights and said that our daughter's brain is not good, let's have another one!