Hello everyone, I'm "he said", welcome to watch "Campus Jokes Collection" (Attached: The weather is getting cold, everyone pay attention to keep warm!）
The female teacher was correcting the English essay and suddenly became angry: "I have never seen such a bad English essay!."”
Seeing this, the male teacher asked, "What is written?"”
Teacher: "Write a story about a prince and a princess." ”
The male teacher said, "That's good!."”
The female teacher said speechlessly: "He actually wrote at the beginning that the prince asked the princess: 'Can you speak Chinese?'The princess replied: 'Yes.'All that follows is Chinese......”
When I was in junior high school, I met a classmate who ran very fast when he went to school, and I quickly asked him, "Why do you run so fast in school?"Grab and eat it?“
The classmate said, "Because I have a poor memory." “
I wondered, "What does this have to do with memory?"“
A classmate said: "I just memorized a text at home, and I was worried that I would forget the text if I was delayed on the road for a long time. “
Hey, you're a fucking genius!
There are a few classmates in the class who like to give their classmates nicknames, and if your surname is Zhang, you will be called "Lao Zhang";If the surname is Li, you will be called "Lao Li", a universal match, as long as you add the word "old" in front.
One day, the female classmate I had a crush on for two years also called me by my nickname: "Old Gong, lend me your pen." “
Ah, I feel so nostalgic for that feeling, this nickname has surprised me for three years, and now I want to go back to junior high school, what a group of wives and concubines.
Wow!Lao Gong, husband, hehe, it's a little interesting)
Today I finally became the most famous fool in the school, and the teacher said in the open class: "If you don't study hard, you will find a fill-in-the-blank question in the future, and if you study hard now, you will find a multiple-choice question in the future." “
The teacher then asked me, "Zhang Qiang, do you want to do multiple-choice questions or fill-in-the-blank questions in the future......?"“
I didn't even think about it and said, "Teacher, I like to do fill-in-the-blank questions so that I can write Zhang Ziyi's name!"“
Hahahaha, in an instant, the laughter of the whole classroom echoed throughout the campus!
When I was in junior high school, because my English was not good with my tablemates, we discussed it, and I chose A and he chose D. I scored 11 points and he got a beating.
The teacher slammed his head with that paper and said continuously, "Is there an option D?"Is there a d option?”
In chemistry class, the teacher explained the relationship between solvents and solutes, and the teacher said: "A certain amount of solvent can only dissolve a certain amount of solvent, for example, solvents are like stomachs, solutes are like meals, you can eat a second bowl if you eat one bowl, but the third bowl is full after eating, can you still eat it?"“
Suddenly, a student asked the teacher, "Teacher, do you still have any food?"“
The teacher ...... blanklyAnd thenThe whole class burst into laughter!」
Such girlfriends.
Before the exam, I said to my girlfriend at the front desk, "When I kick your stool during the exam, you can give me a look." “
She readily agreed.
After a while of the exam, after I kicked my best friend's stool, I only heard the best friend in front of me make a faint voice, "Meow meow."
I really wanted to ......I don't know if she did it on purpose orPretend
At the sports meeting, there was a classmate who had cramps in his running leg and was lying on the ground half-dead, and the classmate ran over to rub his leg, good guy, it was a fierce rub and rubbing, rubbing for about five or six minutes, the classmate lying on the ground slowly opened his eyes and said six words: "It was that leg that was pumped." ”
Math class. The student asks, "Teacher, why is the distance between two points the shortest in a straight line?"”
The teacher said, "You throw a bone out, do you say the dog went around in a circle to pick it up or just ran over to pick it up." ”
Student: "Of course I just ran to pick it up." ”
Teacher: "You still ask questions that even dogs know." ”
The English teacher asked the students to translate, "What does it mean to share rose and get fun?"”
Xiao Ming raised his hand and replied, "You share roses and fun." ”
The teacher said, "No!."”
At this time, my table mate whispered to me, "The answer is fish-flavored shredded pork and rice bowls!"”
I glanced at her, and I thought that the English class representative would not lie to me, and I just wanted to show it in class, so I raised my hand and replied, "Teacher, it's fish-flavored shredded pork and rice bowls!."”
As a result, the whole class laughed.
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