Zeng Guofan once wrote in a letter to his family:
With harmony as the first, the family and everything prospers, and the family and happiness are self-sufficient. ”
The way to make peace in the family is not to treat others as yourself.
In everything, we should consider problems from the perspective of the other party, understand each other, and tolerate each other.
People can be close, and the family and everything is prosperous. It's not easy for your family to understand me, and I know your difficulties.
In a family, if someone doesn't know how to understand, doesn't know gratitude, and doesn't want to be motivated, then the probability of the family getting better is very low.
Turgenev said
He who does not tolerate others does not deserve to be tolerated by others. ”
Understanding is a two-way street, only asking others to understand themselves, and never taking the initiative to understand others, such people are selfish and domineering.
The best relationship is not easy to understand each other, especially between relatives.
I once met a pair of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law who got along very well:
A woman who loves cleanliness and fashionable foreign style married a rural guy, and her mother-in-law is an old lady who has lived in the countryside all her life.
However, two people with such a different environment and personality get along very harmoniously.
When the family was eating together, the young man gulped down the noodles, and the daughter-in-law looked surprised.
The mother-in-law saw her daughter-in-law's surprise and hurriedly kicked her son with her feet, signaling him not to make a sound.
When the daughter-in-law saw her mother-in-law's actions, she hurriedly said:
It doesn't matter. And, following her husband's example, she gulped down the noodles.
One day, when my daughter-in-law went out to work, she happened to bump into her mother-in-law with a large mouthful of water in her mouth and sprayed it vigorously on the quilt.
When the mother-in-law saw her daughter-in-law, she quickly explained:
The quilt dried in this way is smooth, and the rural hometown is dried like this. ”
The daughter-in-law did not get angry, but comforted her mother-in-law:
Mom, how happy you are, just follow your rules. ”
The mother-in-law finally relaxed, she knew that her daughter-in-law was understanding herself, and she was even more heartfelt to her daughter-in-law.
She patiently gave her daughter-in-law a pair of embroidered shoes and made a red belly pocket, but her son joked on the side:
Who still wears this now? ”
The daughter-in-law was very happy, holding the clothes and not letting go, and shouted repeatedly:
Good looking, good looking. ”
Once, in a casual conversation with neighbors, my mother-in-law heard their criticism of her daughter-in-law
How can such a delicate flower like our earthen pot?
Don't look for a delicate porcelain pot! ”
The mother-in-law was very angry, and immediately went back and reduced her contact with them.
It is in this mutual understanding and tolerance that the relationship between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law is getting better and better, and it is becoming more and more harmonious.
Jixing" has a saying:
*No foot color, white bi with slight flaws. ”
No one is perfect.
No one is perfect, without shortcomings, and the most important thing is to understand and tolerate each other.
You respect me for three points, and I pay you back.
People are in the process of you coming and going, deepening feelings, turning the combination of strangers into a happy family, and such a family will become more and more prosperous.
As the saying goes: the crow has the righteousness of feeding, and the sheep has the grace of kneeling. ”
Gratitude is not only for parents and benefactors, but also for husband and wife.
I once heard from the elders that there was a "good man" in their village, who was warm-hearted and helpful.
Such a "good person" is very indifferent when he treats his wife, and he is not as enthusiastic as outsiders.
Once, when a man came back from the field with a hoe on his shoulder, he saw a cold pot and a cold stove, and there was no hot food, and he was very angry and sat down on a stool and smoked.
The child stared at him and cried out that he was hungry. He said in a rough voice
Bear with it and wait for your mom to come back and cook. ”
After a long time, the woman who had gone out came back in a hurry, and as soon as she entered the door, she did not care about resting, so she rushed into the kitchen, busy with the family's food.
Seeing this, the man did not come forward to help, but just complained about his wife on the side, accusing her of being irresponsible and making him and the child hungry.
Everyday life is like this, and men are also stingy when it comes to spending money.
There is a bazaar in the town where women want to buy a new dress.
The man only gave her some change, and said:
What new clothes do we croppers wear, they have wasted their money. ”
He was reluctant to buy clothes for his wife, but his wife used the only change she had to buy tobacco leaves that her husband loved to smoke and snacks that her children liked to eat.
The neighbor often saw the woman with a stomachache, and he said to the neighbor:
She has always had a stomachache, it's okay, just take some medicine. ”
Later, the woman was in unbearable pain, and after being taken to the hospital, the doctor told her that she had advanced bowel cancer and that there was no possibility of cure.
Hearing this, the man suddenly felt remorse, but no matter how much he regretted it, he could not save his wife's life.
As the old saying goes: late affection is cheaper than grass, and late sincerity is not as good as soil. ”
When you have it, you take it for granted, don't take it seriously, and think that this is what the other person should do.
By the time I woke up, it was too late, and it was too late to regret it.
What husband and wife are most afraid of is not suffering and poverty, but that the warmth that should be replaced by indifference, not knowing how to understand each other's difficulties, and not seeing each other's contributions.
As the old saying goes: When the hearts of the people are united, Mount Tai moves. ”
If you compare home to a boat, you need everyone to work hard and row in the same direction.
If we can't work together, the family boat will just spin in place, or even be submerged.
A man and a taciturn son live in the neighbors of my friend's hometown, and the two of them depend on each other for their lives.
The man married a wife when he was young, and during that time, his family, like ordinary people, was full of laughter and excitement.
With the development of the economy, more and more people in the village went out to fight and seek a way to survive.
His wife said to him:
You can also go out to work with your neighbors, earn more, and our family life will be better. ”
But the man didn't want to be too tired and insisted on not going out.
Even if a man from the same village came to invite him to go out with him, the answer he got was a refusal.
As the days went on, everyone understood what he meant and stopped coming to him.
Gradually, the people in the village earned money and slowly moved to the city to live, but the man, as always, guarded his one-third of an acre of land and was at ease.
The woman watched other people's lives get better and better, and her heart was itching, and she urged her husband to go out and earn money again.
But the man was unwilling, and he still had a heartbeat:
How can they go out to stay at home comfortably, although we didn't go out, but we didn't worry about eating and drinking, and we didn't live well. ”
Seeing that men are so stubborn, women don't say much.
Once, a woman from a neighboring village came to her and went out with her, saying that there was a good opportunity to make money, and when the woman heard about it, she wanted to try it.
In the end, he decided to partner with a woman from a neighboring village and go out to earn money together.
But the woman left and never came back.
With the passage of time, the child gradually became sensible, because his mother was not around, he was ridiculed by the children, and even became the object of "bullying" by the children.
Later, the child was often alone in a daze, and passers-by greeted him, but he didn't say a word and ignored him.
The Bible says:
If people do not have different hearts, how can they walk together? ”
People should pay attention to the same frequency and the same road, and husbands and wives need to work together with one heart and one mind.
If the husband and wife cannot be united, when they reach a fork in the road, they will inevitably disagree.
A good relationship between husband and wife is to work together, support each other, and build a harmonious and beautiful life together.
As the old saying goes: things are made in harmony, and strength is born in unity. ”
Only when the family is harmonious and united can we fight against the torrent of life and go further and further.
If a family wants to prosper, it needs to understand each other, know how to be grateful, work hard, and live a prosperous life together.
May every home be filled with the warmth of love, caress the tired soul wandering outside, and have a plain and happy beautiful life.
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