In recent years, the complexity of family relationships has been lamented. The connection between every relative seems to be an ever-increasing responsibility, and every aspect of life, from finding a job, buying a house, getting married, to having children go to school, needs our care and support. In this vast network of relatives, it may seem natural to help each other, but how do we deal with it when it becomes a heavy financial burden?
Time passes inadvertently, and we find ourselves caught up in a money entanglement between relatives. In the mother-in-law's family, the differences between the five siblings are jaw-dropping. When you are rich, you eat and drink well, and once you are in trouble, the voice of borrowing is endless. My mother-in-law used to provide for her niece to go to school, but now she has to pay for her sister's cancer. This huge economic pressure makes it impossible not to feel tired.
In another story, a simple New Year's greeting from my cousin turned into the responsibility of buying a pair of **ugg shoes. This seems to have become a popular way to use material luxury to reflect the value of family affection, and people can't help but feel helpless about such expectations.
In the family, the scene of borrowing is not uncommon. My father-in-law lent tens of thousands of dollars to his nephew, and there has been no sign of repayment for many years, has such selfless assistance become a kind of helplessness? Dad was financially constrained, but he had to pay for his relatives' medical expenses and living expenses, and the price of this kind of family affection was really heart-wrenching. What makes people even more distressed is that my aunt's MLM road actually involved my dad and became an "investor" of tens of thousands. Is all this a continuation of family affection, or an economic bottomless pit?
In the midst of the demands of poor relatives, borrowing money has become an "obligation" that cannot be refused. However, these debts often turn into "loss-making businesses" that can never be recovered. Some relatives have borrowed money for 20 years and still haven't repaid it, how can such family affection be "useful"?
In my personal family, except for my father, everyone else is a farmer. However, the differences between relatives bothered me. In the city, their every move has become an unavoidable responsibility for me. Shopping, traveling, eating, all the expenses have become a burden for me alone. Especially when they were sick, I had to devote myself to all the expenses during my hospitalization. Can this kind of unrequited dedication be truly understood?
My mother's poor relatives gave me more trouble. Every time my uncle's family came to the city, it was almost a "plunder" of my family, and I couldn't do without my support for eating, drinking, and Lazar. This is especially true when returning to his hometown, where the excuse of "illiterate" has become a reason not to spend a penny. Is such a relative a real "relative"?
Compared with my husband's family, I felt the heaviness of the differences between relatives more deeply. They have been living in the system since their grandparents and grandparents, and they have never been stingy in family dinners, and they are even more extravagant in banquets. On the other hand, I had never had such an upscale dining experience before I spent time with them. However, even in such a wealthy family, the relationship between relatives is still full of contradictions and challenges, just like ordinary people.
Looking back, is all this a continuation of family affection, or a kind of economic oppression? When the relationship between relatives turns into a money exchange, can we find a more reasonable way to get along with each other? Perhaps, it is just a conundrum about family and money, which requires us to think deeply and find a more balanced lifestyle.
In this challenging network of relatives, will we be able to find a way to not only maintain family affection, but also solve financial problems? Perhaps, through these trivial family experiences, we can better understand the true meaning of family affection and find a healthier and more balanced way to get along.
February** Dynamic Incentive Program